


The Howling Canyon

by DrownedOutStars



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: A Lot of Plot, A lot a lot of plot, Actual Wolf Pack Dynamics, Age Difference, Alternate Universe - Werewolf, Alternate Universe - Western, Bandits & Outlaws, Biting, Blood, Blood Kink, Blood and Gore, Blow Jobs, Breeding Kink, Cannibalism, Cannibalistic Thoughts, Character Death, Choking, F/M, Gore, Graphic Description of Corpses, Gun Violence, I am constantly editing this because I'm a perfectionist, Imprinting, Kind of mating kind of not mating, Kylo Ren has a southern accent, Obsessive Behavior, Obsessive Kylo Ren, Old Western AU, Oral Sex, Outdoor Sex, Outlaw Kylo Ren, Porn With Plot, Possessive Behavior, Possessive Kylo Ren, Praise Kink, Protective Kylo Ren, Rough Kissing, Rough Oral Sex, Rough Sex, Saloon girl Rey, Shootouts, Size Kink, So many old western sayings, Techincally mating, These are the terrifying type of werewolves, Traditional werewolves, Vaginal Fingering, Werewolves, so much plot
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-03
Updated: 2020-07-29
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:21:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 22
Words: 62,456
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23462374
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DrownedOutStars/pseuds/DrownedOutStars
Summary: At first she thought they were coyote attacks, but it turned out to be something much more gruesome.(Old Western werewolf Reylo AU set in the 1870s)
Relationships: Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 135
Kudos: 327





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Strap in folks, this here is an old western werewolf Reylo AU and it _will_ get messy. I'm not entirely sure how many chapters this will have, but I've been wanting to do an Old West AU for months and I'm finally getting around to it.

It was an early June morning and Rey stirred in her small bed as her eyes fluttered open, the young girl groaning softly as she closed them. She could tell it was barely five in the morning from how it was still dark out, the coyotes still howling distantly in the rocky canyons that her town resided in.

The name of her town was Niima Outpost located in the very heart of Nevada. It was a quiet town--well, on Sundays it was, at least. It was home to various thieving scum, outlaws known for being born here and a murder in the square at least three times a week. There was no sheriff here, everyone knew how to use a gun and the law barely existed. Everyone was for themselves here when it all came down to survival, including Kira Rey Kenobi.

Her parents had abandoned her at an exceptionally young age, having left her on the steps of the church with a note that only had her name and a thin, ratty blanket wrapped around her tiny, frail body. She was underfed, starving to death, and Reverend Ben Kenobi had instantly taken her in. He was a kind old man, a man of God and faith, and Rey had seen him as her paternal father. 

Sadly, he had died when she was but thirteen. A coyote attack, they had said, but she had been there when he died. No coyote could make scratches that deep, no coyote could maul a body that brutally. The Devil himself had killed him, and day after day she wished he had taken her instead. 

"Rey, darling," Rey was snapped out of her thoughts as Madame Holdo rapped her knuckles on her open bedroom door, the brunette instantly sitting up with an alert expression. "It's your turn to set up the saloon this morning." Madame Holdo smiled brightly, the corner of her eyes wrinkling as she did so. Madame Holdo was basically Rey's mother, and she knew better than to say no.

Madame Amilyn Holdo had taken her in when Ben died, having instantly given her a bed and the only certain type of warmth a mother could give. She owed her life and very gratitude to the Madame, and Rey had loved her relentlessly for five years now.

"Yes, ma'am," Rey softly smiled back and the older woman nodded happily, her short blonde hair bouncing as she did so. Rey once had the strangest dream where Madame Holdo's hair was purple like a lavender field, and she could never look at her hair the same since. "We open at seven?"

"Of course, my love," Madame Holdo winked before walking off and Rey sighed as she got out of bed while stretching her arms up into the air, a yawn escaping her lips as she did so. 

It took her about an hour to get dressed and ready, Kaydel having come in around five forty-five to lace up her corset as the two giggled about the group of handsome cowboys that had come in the day before. 

"I'm tellin' you, Rey, that one with the gray hat was starin' at you like you were somethin' mighty fine!" Kaydel laughed and Rey snorted loudly before hissing under her breath as the blonde tightened her corset even more so. "He was lookin' at you like a you were a river in a desert!"

"We practically are out in the desert, Del, have you seen the red canyons around here?" Rey chuckled breathlessly as Kaydel finished lacing up her corset, the blonde clapping her hands together as she stepped back with a grin. Kaydel Connix was one of her fellow saloon girls and hailed from Texas and she had the thickest western accent Rey had ever heard with her own two ears. It was sweet like fresh marmalade, and she was popular with almost every single man that came into the saloon.

"Yes, well, I think he made do with you just fine, hmm?" Rey turned around to smirk at her and Kaydel snorted loudly before the two girls burst into laughter. 

"No, he was God _awful_ in bed! I felt like I was bein' fucked by a fish or somethin'!"

"Spare me the details, Del," Rey gagged and Kaydel burst into another fit of giggles. "Is Poe already up?" Poe Dameron was the saloon's bartender and one of Rey's closest friends. He was the smuggest son of a bitch she ever did meet and she _lived_ for the moments they would bicker and jab at each other.

"Mhm, and he's lookin' _delicious_ today!"

"You do know that he swings the other way, right?"

"A girl can dream," Kaydel sighed loudly and Rey shook her head with a smile as she rolled her eyes playfully. 

Rey made her way down into the saloon, her heels clicking against the wooden steps to alert Poe of his presence.

"Wild thing, is that you?" 

"You know it, Dameron!" She called out to him as she got to the last step, Poe chuckling quietly as he straightened out the numerous alcohol bottles on the shelf behind the bar countertop. 

"How's Beebee this morning? Should I go out and catch more rabbits for him?" Rey smiled as she approached the bar, Poe looking up at her with an equal smile as he rested his elbows on the countertop.

"You spoil my dog too much, wild thing, you know that? I think he's beginning to love you more than me,"

"Oh, is that so? He can move in with me any time," Rey smirked and Poe scoffed with a smile as he shook his head, his black curls moving along with the movement of his head. "I'm going to help you set up if that's alright?"

"Like I could give a shit if you move the chairs," Poe snorted loudly and Rey laughed as she began to tidy up the saloon. It was a quaint little building, save for the numerous bullet holes in the walls and windows. The walls were painted cream years ago, and everything else was made of pure wood. She loved the saloon, it was her home, and so she cleaned it like it was. She was just thankful there was no dried blood on any surfaces this morning to scrub off of. 

An hour passed and she was in the back of the saloon dusting off the organ, humming to herself quietly as she heard Kaydel and Poe chattering up at the front.

She paused as she heard both Kaydel and Poe fall silent, the sound of the saloon doors swinging open and heavy boots on the wooden floor filling the building.

"Hi there," A deep southern voice drawled out and Rey involuntarily shuddered as she heard it. It was thick and sweet like molasses, like honey. But Rey knew there were bees where there was honey, and she had a bad feeling that this bee stung. "You wouldn't happen to know if there was any lodgin' here?"

"...Oh, my Lord, I know who you are," Rey heard Kaydel breathe out and Rey slowly reached for the shotgun behind the organ. "You're Kylo Ren, you're the Black Mamba..."

Well, _shit_. If he was here, that meant his two partners, Hux and Phasma, weren't far off. 

"Aren't you cute?" The same voice purred out and Rey sucked in her breath as her hand wrapped around the gun, the brunette waiting to run out there and start blazing if the fucker made a move. "You've seen my wanted posters, I assume?" _Kaydel, don't you dare start flirting with a mass murdering snake of an outlaw._

"Yeah," She heard Kaydel reply quietly and Rey clenched her jaw. "They're everywhere 'round these parts..."

"We're not looking for trouble," That was Poe. "And Amilyn won't let you stay here--"

"You see, I don't really like that answer," She heard a pistol click and she cursed under her breath as she instantly ran out to the main room.

Kylo paused as he heard a shotgun being cocked behind him, the man slowly raising his eyebrows as he looked over his shoulder. 

And there she was. 

Her brown hair was up in the traditional saloon girl style, but he couldn't help but notice a few wild flyaway stray hairs that stuck out. Her skin was lightly golden, kissed by the sun ever so gently, but it was her eyes that stuck out to him. They were blazing hazel, vivid green with flecks of warm brown that he could just melt into like hot butter out in the sun.

"...Well, salutations, ma'am," He smirked and Rey surprised him by smirking smugly back, her finger hovering right over the trigger of the shotgun. "That's an awfully unpleasant way to greet a stranger, ain't it?"

He was...strangely beautiful in his very own unique way. She could see the black tresses underneath his black ten-gallon hat that reached his lower neck, his amber (she swore they looked more gold than anything) eyes burning brightly into hers as they stared each other down. Beauty marks dusted his face, and--good God, the man had the fullest lips she had ever seen.

"Oh, Mister Ren, I can assure you that this is one of the more pleasant ways we greet guests like you," Rey practically purred out and Kylo felt a shiver run down his spine at her surprisingly posh accent.

"And what is a lovely young thing like you doin' out here in Nevada? Was London no longer good enough?"

"My past is none of your concern, Mister Ren, now is it?" She tilted the gun up so it was pointed directly between his eyes, Kylo chuckling softly. "Now, I suggest you go back outside with your gang of wild hooligans, who I assume aren't far off, and ride off now, you hear?"

"And if I don't?"

"The wall behind you would look lovely red," She drawled and Kylo instantly became smitten with those eight words. His cock twitched in his pants at the thought of bending her over a table and taking her right then and there, taking his cock like she had been made to do. Even her scent heavily appealed to him, thick waves of summer honey and harsh spices. "I don't think Madame Holdo would mind a new paint job."

"I suppose we'll get out of your hair then, hmm? Is there any way you could hook a man up with a bottle of whiskey before he goes?"

"You have a dollar?" Rey raised a brow and Kylo licked his lips before clicking his tongue. Oh, yes, he was smitten. "The infamous Black Mamba has to pay too, you're not special in these parts, and you're especially not special to me."

 _I'd like to be_ , he whispered in the back of his mind. _I'd like to be the only thing you ever care about again._

"I think I have a dollar in my pocket, yeah," He hummed as he slowly turned around, Rey never lowering the shotgun. "Will you be a sweetheart and grab it for me, darlin'?"

"First of all, I am not your sweetheart nor your darling," Rey took one hand off of the shotgun, her hand reaching down and going into his left pants pocket. "And second of all, I don't want you back in my town."

"Your town, huh? I didn't know you were mayor,"

"Oh, believe me, I'm not," She pulled the dollar from his pocket, waving it in the air so Poe could see it. "But I live here, don't I? I would assume that makes it my town."

"You're not wrong there," Kylo grinned and Rey scoffed loudly before lowering the shotgun, motioning her head towards the saloon doors for him to get out. 

"I will put your precious bottle of whiskey outside, you will take it, and then you will leave. Do I make myself clear, Mister Ren?"

"Crystal as the Gila River," He tipped his infamous black hat towards her, the brunette looking him up and down with an intrigued expression before a small smirk painted itself on her petal like lips. God, what a sight she was to him. He could only think how much more beautiful she would be with amber eyes and her belly round with his pups.

"Hmph, I would assume you were here for the gold,"

"On the contrary, ma'am, I'm here for an experience," He winked at her and Rey snorted loudly in annoyed amusement. "And so far, you've given me a hell of one."

"Get out, Mister Ren. My offer on the wall being painted still stands." She once again gestured towards the saloon doors (although this time with the shotgun), and Kylo looked her up and down one final time before putting his pistol back in his holster and putting his hands up as he walked backwards towards the swinging doors. 

"Keep the dollar and the whiskey, darlin'. I think the experience you gave me is much better than liquid fire in a bottle." He grinned before disappearing out the doors, Rey not putting the gun down until he heard his horse ninny and gallop away.

"Jesus Christ, you just held a gun to _the_ Black Mamba's face and got away with it!" Poe wheezed as he let out the breath he'd been holding in, Rey rolling her eyes before walking over to him at the bar and slamming the dollar down on the wooden countertop. Kaydel instantly clung to her, chattering excitedly about how brave she was and how she was now her very own personal hero.

Little did she know that Kylo now had no intentions of leaving whatsoever, and she was in for a hell of an experience as well.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I had to change the time period from the 1850s to the 1870s because the Black Mamba hadn't been discovered until the 1860s, and I'm trying to make this as historically accurate as possible.  
> The Gold Rush was still happening in the 1870s, all around the world actually, but the California/Nevada Gold Rush did end in 1855 (but gold was still being found and mined in the 1870s).

"Back so soon? And without food? Tsk, tsk, Ren," Phasma clicked her tongue as Kylo rode up to their campsite, the blonde woman huddled in front of the dead campfire with a blanket wrapped around her shoulders. Her face, hands, and upper body were caked with dried blood, even her hair had numerous strands coated in the sinful red substance. 

"Seems like you already found food by the amount of blood splattered on your face," Kylo chuckled as he hopped off his horse, gently slapping the black stallion's flank and the horse took off with a loud neigh. He'd come back, he always did. "Where's Hux?"

"Mmn, you don't wish to know," Phasma brought the tin cup in her hands to her lips, Kylo not even having to smell the air to know it was dead blood. "He took some girl last night...I didn't catch her name. Some saloon girl." 

"Is that so?" Kylo sighed as he sat beside her, holding his hand out and Phasma instantly handed him the cup. 

"I thought you went out to get food and booze, what happened?"

 _She happened._ "I got distracted, simply put."

"You? Distracted?" Phasma raised a pale brow as she smirked and Kylo simply shrugged as he took a sip from the cup. " _The_ Black Mamba doesn't get distracted so easily, what happened?" 

He glanced over at her, her amber eyes burning intensely into his. She hailed from the same country as that beautiful, fiery saloon girl--he should really learn her name, shouldn't he? He'd find out later. "And why is it you wish to know, Cottonmouth?" He sneered slightly and Phasma huffed as she looked away with an annoyed expression on her face. 

"Just curious to what could possibly distract you," She muttered and Kylo took another sip before handing her back the cup and standing up. 

"It's none of your concern, Gwen. Are there parts of that saloon girl still here?" He asked and Phasma raised the cup with a smirk. Ah, he had been drinking what was left then. Pity, he was hungry. "Let me guess," He sighed loudly as he brushed the dust from his black slacks. "Hux decided to be greedy and gobble up the entire body?"

"Yes, sir," She snickered and Kylo clenched his jaw. He regretted ever biting and turning that redheaded priss. His appetite was tenacious, and he would normally have to shove him down against the ground during a feeding just so he could eat. Phasma didn't care, but that's because Phasma hunted also on her own besides with them. "Save for the head that he left somewhere up in the canyons."

"Damn bitch of a man," Kylo spat, the man angry enough to swallow a horn-toad backwards. "He's worse than a starved coyote during the winter." 

"What did you expect? You went off, he got peckish,"

"No, no, no," Kylo waved his hands as he laughed bitterly. "No, the man doesn't get 'peckish', he gets _ravenous_. He's as dead as a can of corned beef when he comes back 'round." He hissed out and Phasma whistled loudly in amusement at how much he was bristling over Hux. He was grittin’ his teeth like he could bite the sites off a six-gun, the man looking around the deep canyon they had taken camp in for any signs of the troublesome redhead. He had wanted proper lodging in this state, but it appeared that camping out was the only option after the showdown in the saloon. 

"You and your funny western sayings," Phasma snorted and Kylo looked down at her. "Sometimes it really is like you're speaking an entirely different language."

"Oh, my apologies, ma'am, would you prefer if I used 'proper' English like you Brits?" He smirked and Phasma deadpanned before shaking her head as a small smile crept up on her lips.

"Nah, it wouldn't sound right coming from you," She grinned and Kylo snorted as looked back up and out at the canyon. The canyon was deep, the rocks and cliffs red with rich iron oxide--or was it hematite? It could be either, he didn't care enough to dwell on what lay beneath the minerals. He blamed his late uncle for having an interest in rocks in the first place. Damn geologist.

"How far up was that stream, Cottonmouth?"

"Mmn, about a good mile or two, I'd say. You finally going to strip off all that leather? It's incredibly hot out here, I don't even know why you wear all black in the--the Black Mamba. I get it now. You and your damned aesthetics," Phasma grunted before tossing the cup back and gulping down the rest of the slowly coagulating blood, Kylo rolling his eyes as he brought his fingers to his mouth and whistled for Starkiller to come back. 

The black stallion came galloping towards him from the end of the canyon, Kylo hopping on him as he came closer. He rode to the end of the canyon, the sun on his back and the wind caressing his face harshly like a scorned, bitter lover. 

He couldn't stop thinking about her, about the saloon girl, and his obsession was growing with each passing second. She had threatened him, held a shotgun to his face, and she had done so without a shred of fear. She was beyond fearless to even look at him the way she did, and he grinned to himself as he thought about how he could make her permanently his.

 _"You'll always be doomed to be alone, Ren,"_ Snoke's cold voice hissed at the back of his mind. _"Doomed to be a tragedy."_

"Not anymore," Kylo purred out. "Not with her."

\--------------------------------------

"Hey, sweetie, have you seen Brandy? She wasn't up in her room nor is she anywhere on the lower floor..." Kaydel frowned in Rey's doorway, Rey looking up at her as she slipped on her pantyhose. She had just had a customer (he had been kind enough to leave three dollars, and Rey couldn't stop staring down at it on her dresser like it was pure gold) and she was redressing herself. 

"No, I haven't seen her. I'm sure she's out with Jack, right? The banker from down the road? I heard he's in love with her and that they're planning to get hitched at some point,"

"Mmn, maybe," Kaydel twirled a strand of her hair as she looked out Rey's window, Rey huffing as she fluffed her hair in the dresser mirror. "It's just not like her to run off, ya know? She's always here,"

"Well, it'll be evening soon, and I'm sure she'll come running through the saloon doors any moment. Don't worry about her, Brandy is a very responsible woman." Rey smiled comfortingly over at Kaydel, the blonde looking at her with a slight frown. She could see the nervous energy practically radiating off of her friend, her warm brown eyes shining with uneasiness. 

"Okay, sugar, if you really think she will..." Kaydel sighed as she left and went back down the stairs down to the lower part of the saloon, Rey walking over to her window and pushing it up to let the summer air in. 

Those eyes, she couldn't stop thinking about his eyes. Those blazing golden amber irises shimmering with murderous danger, with ill intent, and yet she had not seen that ill intent aimed at her. No, his almost inhuman gaze had been one of intense peak curiosity. It had been as if he was studying her, trying to figure out who she very was just by staring at her.

"Murderous snake..." She muttered as she wrapped her shawl tighter around her shoulders, a shiver running up her spine as she spoke. Of course she had known who he was, almost everyone in all the states knew who he was as well as his two partners. Kylo Ren, the Black Mamba, was notorious for shooting innocents just for the hell of it. His two partners, Armitage Hux, Copperhead, was even worse than he was, and Gwendolyn Phasma, Cottonmouth, was known for her quick shots. If all three of them had been there that morning, she was almost positive Madame Holdo would be cleaning Poe's, Kaydel's, and her blood off the walls.

But his _eyes_. His wanted posters couldn't have captured that brilliant gold if they even dared to try. It was the very gold rush in the irises of one man, and she found it highly disturbing how she couldn't get him out of her head. She wondered if she'd ever seen a man that tall and built in her life, and she couldn't recall that she had. The man was built like a steam locomotive, and she thanked her lucky stars that he had not torn her in two right then and there with his bare hands.

A slightly cold (which was incredibly odd) breeze blew through her window, Rey shuddering yet again before slamming the window closed and cursing softly under her breath as she looked down at the floor. She turned and left her room, her heels clicking against the wooden floorboards as she approached the stairs. She could hear the loud chatter of customers and fellow saloon girls, Kaydel's bell like laugh highly distinguishable from the other laughter that rang out. This was a joyous place, if you ignored the murders and shootouts that happened frequently, but Rey felt...empty. Hollow.

It was times like these where she thought of the late Reverend, thinking of the times where she would sit with him on the church pews as they read the Bible together. _"God has a plan for you, Rey,_ " he would say, _"He will guide you when you feel the most lost."_

"I feel lost now," She whispered to herself as she made her way down the stairs. "And He is nowhere to be found." She whispered yet again, her tone much more solemn this time, and she began to descend down the stairs. 

"Rey," She stopped as Finn, one of her very dear childhood friends, stood at the bottom of the stairs with his hat in his hand and a frightened look in his dark eyes. "There's been another coyote attack."

Rey nearly fell down the stairs, grabbing the handrail of the stairs tightly as she stared at him with wide eyes. "...Who was it, Finn? Whose body did you find?" Her voice was dead quiet, her tone wavering with hidden fear. 

"Brandy," He swallowed and Rey slowly sank down, a loud curse escaping her lips as she did so. "I found her...head out in the canyons while I was taking Beebee out for a run."

"Just her head?" Rey whispered and Finn nodded quickly as he hung his head sadly.

"Half of her face was gone, Rey. I--I don't think these are coyote attacks--"

"No, it's the Devil. The Devil must be back," She breathed shakily as she smoothed her skirt out shakily, her hands trembling as she did so. "He's back for more innocents."

"The Devil isn't real, Rey," Finn muttered and Rey let out a dry laugh in return. Of course the Devil was real, he was much more real than God in her mind. "I think we might have...wolves,"

" _Wolves_?" She looked at him strangely before shaking her head in disbelief. "Wolves aren't in these regions, Finn. They're an extreme rarity, you know that! These aren't wolves, it can't be!" She stood up and Finn sucked in his breath as he shrugged halfheartedly. 

"It's pure carnage, Rey. I nearly threw up, she--she was missing _both_ of her eyes. They'd been clawed out mercilessly, and her mouth was twisted in a permanent scream, it was--it was one of the worst things I've ever seen..." He looked ready to break down and Rey quickly walked down to him, putting her hand on his cheek as her expression softened. 

"I'll tell Madame Holdo, alright? Go back out there and keep talking to your beau. He talks about you constantly, you know that?" Rey smiled softly and Finn forced a smile as he nodded. He and Poe had been together for at least a couple years now, only having sanctuary in the upstairs saloon to express their love.

"Rey," Finn sighed as he turned to walk away and Rey looked at him. "Be safe, yeah?"

"I always am." Rey smiled and Finn nodded once more before walking away, Rey sitting back down on the stairs as she held her head in her hands.

The attacks had started again, and she wondered just how many casualties there would be this time.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> God, I absolutely love writing psychotic, delusional characters.
> 
> Edit: Also, yes, I made BB-8 a beagle!!!! It fits his color scheme perfectly and I also believe a beagle fits his personality perfectly! Beagles are incredibly intelligent, sweet dogs who are highly determined and excitable! Plus, beagles are adorable and so is BB-8 :')

Rey stood out on the porch of saloon at sunset, the wind gently rustling her hair as she stared out at the horizon. The sky was brilliantly blinding with different shades of orange, yellow, and red, but instead of it being a beautiful sight to her, it was a sign of the upcoming hell. She swore she could smell the distinct scent of brimstone in the air, even.

"Finn told me," Poe came up behind her and Rey quietly hummed to acknowledge his presence. "Have you told Amilyn yet?"

"No," She looked over her shoulder at him as she crossed her arms. "I haven't, not yet. I will later, it's just--she was close with Brandy, we all were. She was basically everyone's older sister, she used to sit with me during thunderstorms and we'd count how many pauses there was before lightning struck. It's going to be hard, Poe--"

"And yet it seems like you're not grieving at all," Poe arched a dark brow and Rey ran her tongue over her teeth before clicking her tongue and letting out a quiet, dry laugh. He was right, she wasn't really grieving over the older woman whatsoever. "He also told me you were back on that Devil talk--"

"It is the Devil," She muttered as she looked back to the sunset. "The Devil takes many forms, Poe, and it's taken the form of rabid coyotes." 

"Finn said it could be wolves--"

"That's a load of horseshit," Rey scoffed and Poe stepped forward to stand beside her. "We don't get wolves around these parts, you know that. The last wolf sighting was a good fifty years ago."

"Maybe they come every fifty years then?" Poe rubbed the back of his neck nervously and Rey pursed her lips as she thought about his words. Poe could be right, but then again...what type of wolf pack migrates once every fifty years? 

"I'm going to go to the church, alright?" Rey sighed and Poe looked at her uneasily. "What? Come on now, you know I'm armed." Rey lifted her skirt up slightly to reveal the knife holster strapped on her thigh, her hunting knife snug as a bug within it. "Do you actually think I would let coyotes attack me and get away with it?"

"No, wild thing, I don't," Poe gently placed his hand on the small of her back with a sad smile. "But be careful, yeah? You're honestly one of the only people 'round here that makes a lick of sense to me--besides Finn, of course,"

"Of course." Rey winked before walking down the porch steps, the young female making her way down to the church that sat at the very end of Niima Outpost.

The church was in shambles, in all honesty. The paint was chipping, the wood slowly rotting and there never seemed to be an ounce of light in sight within its decrepit walls. It began to decay shortly after the Reverend died, and the only person who still visited the grounds was Rey herself.

The rumor was that it was haunted by the Devil himself, for how else could it begin to decay so quickly? No one dared to go near, no one dared to step inside, but that was the funny thing about Rey. She didn't see it as cursed or haunted, she saw it as her home still. She would tidy things up, sweep the floors and dust off the pews. She would talk out loud as if he was still there, as if he was standing behind her and listening to every word she spoke.

"Hello, Father," Rey spoke softly as she stepped inside the church, the sound of silence greeting her like an old friend. "I wonder what Bible story we'll read today?" Rey smiled sadly as she walked by the numerous rows of pews slowly, the only sound the sound of her heels on the creaking wood beneath her. "Shall I read today, do you think?"

Some would call it sad that she was speaking to a man who was not there, to a man who was long dead, but to Rey it was the only time she truly felt relaxed anymore. It was always something at the saloon, always a customer or a gunfight or a good old fashion tustling, but here it was quiet. Here she could think, she could breathe, and she could speak all the things on her mind that she dare not tell anyone but the Reverend himself. It was peaceful, in her mind. A true form of sanctuary.

She walked over to the church podium, running her fingers along the spine of the old Bible that lay upon it. It was once his, and he had never gone anywhere without it. It was always in his pocket, or his hand, and the smell of its pages had become Rey's most favorite scent in the entire world. 

She slowly opened the Bible, flipping through its yellowed pages as she hummed quietly to herself. The air around her seemed to fill with the ambiance of sweet melancholy, a bittersweet sadness that consumed the very church. She slowly read a passage, her hand reaching down to her thigh as she saw a shadow looming in the church doorway.

"Either you're a dense fool or the bravest person in existence to walk in here," She spoke in a bitter tone without looking up, the shadow chuckling softly. Her head whipped up to see Kylo standing there, his golden eyes burning into her very soul as he slowly smiled.

"I've been called a fool once or twice, yes," He smirked and Rey's expression hardened as she withdrew the hunting knife from its sheath, pointing it at him with a murderous glare in her eyes. He laughed in amusement at this, leaning in the church entryway. "Will you point a weapon at me each time we meet, perhaps?"

"Get. Out." She ground out each word individually, a fiery hatred burning brightly within her tone. She would not have a murderer step foot inside the only place she had left that had the Reverend's presence in it. "Get out now or so help me God--"

"God?" Kylo smiled and Rey narrowed her eyes. "Oh, darlin', there ain't a God here. No, no," He laughed as he took a step forward and Rey let out a low hiss as she gripped her knife tighter. "I'm more acquainted with the Devil."

"The Devil is not allowed on these grounds--"

"And yet," He was approaching her now, Rey's chest quietly heaving as his eyes continued to burn into hers. "Here I am." He was getting closer and Rey felt trapped in the very place where she was supposed to be the safest. It was the cruelest irony God could ever throw upon her.

"I never got your name, you know that? Here you are, threatenin' me yet again, and I don't even know your name," He was too close. " _Angel_." He purred the nickname out and Rey let out a quiet snarl as she stood her ground. 

"Get. Out. _Now_!" She practically shouted the last word and he was in front of her now, the man slowly pushing her hand down so the knife was no longer pointed at him.

"I will if you tell me your name," He spoke softly and Rey inhaled shakily, unable to tear her eyes away from his. "You're hauntin' me, and I don't even have a name to address the phantom." His voice was quieter this time and Rey gasped softly as he gently brushed her hair away from her eyes. 

"W-what are you...?" She breathed out and he scoffed with a smile as he brushed her hair to the side so her neck was visible to him. "Are you really the Devil?"

"Would you really like me to answer that?" He replied in the same soft tone and Rey felt like she was in a strange trance. She felt like she wasn't even in her own body, that he had taken control and he was puppeting her very emotions and actions. Yet she still forced herself to feel rage, she still forced herself to glare at him.

"You're a monster..." She whispered with the same murderous look in her eyes and Kylo chuckled softly as he leaned in and inhaled the sweet scent of the skin of her throat. Her aroma was pure honey, one of sweetness with a kick of earthly spices. He had guessed right, she most certainly was meant for him, and he had imprinted upon her the moment he lay his eyes on her. She was _his_.

"I have been searchin' for you for so long, darlin', you can't even begin to fathom how... _lonely_ I've been without you," He wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her closely against him with the most maniacal smile Rey had ever seen on a man. "And now that you're here--well, I could just very well cry." He purred out and Rey felt her eyelashes flutter as her grip on the knife slowly loosened. "Give yourself to me, will you? The things we could do together, you can't even imagine." He began to lean down towards her throat and Rey slowly began to let her head fall back before she paused.

No. No, she would not fall to the Devil's charms. She quickly raised the knife, slashing the right side of his face vertically all the way down to his lower chest, and Kylo let out a scream as he stumbled backwards. She had nearly cut down to the pearly whiteness of his bone, his flesh splayed and revealing the red muscles of flesh beneath his skin. He clutched the heavily bleeding side of his face with a shocked (and betrayed?) expression, Rey running right past him only to hear him suddenly _laughing_ in the purest delight. It was by far the scariest thing she had ever heard. If the Devil had a laugh, this was it.

"Oh, darlin', I didn't know you felt the same!" He laughed louder as she fled the church, hot tears of terror pricking her eyes as she ran as fast as she could. His laughter would haunt her dreams forever, she was sure of that, and out of the corner of her eye she saw his horse. 

She had two decisions here. Either she could run back to the saloon, which he could very well run after her, or she could steal his horse and flee to the canyons in which Finn lived in a small house he had built himself. 

"REY!" Her head whipped towards the saloon where she saw Poe standing, Rey looking back at the church to see Kylo standing in the doorway with the most twisted grin as blood poured down his face from his gaping wound. 

She quickly jumped on his horse, the black stallion letting out a loud neigh as it reared back, only for Rey to let out a loud shout as the horse began to run towards the canyons. She heard Kylo laughing again, then the sounds of gunshots, and she prayed to God that Poe wasn't the one shooting back. 

She shouted again and the horse picked up speed, Rey holding the reins tightly as she tried her best not to break down. His blood stained her face, her soul, and the very church floor. He had desecrated the only holy place she had left, and for that she hated him. 

All around her was red. Red rocks, red sand...and she felt like she was in her very own personal hell. His laughter echoed in her ears and she hastily wiped her eyes with the back of her eyes as they entered the canyons. She attempted to steer the horse to the left towards Finn's house, bit for some odd reason, it continued to gallop forward.

"No, no, left! Left!" She cried out as she tried to steer the horse again but he let out a loud ninny as he began to gallop even faster. "L-LEFT!" She screamed and the horse halted so quickly that she fell off, Rey crying out as she landed on her back. She gasped loudly for air as the wind was knocked out of her, the young girl clutching her chest as she looked up at the quickly darkening sky. 

With darkness came coyotes, and Rey feared that this was how she would die. She heard the horse run off and she let out a hoarse scream up at the sky in a panicked rage. She was stupid to have thought that the horse would even listen to her in the first place, but she had needed to get away from him. She had needed to get away from Kylo Ren, the Black Mamba, the--the _Devil himself_. 

She let out another scream before beginning to cry, flashes of the Reverend's corpse playing in her mind on repeat. The claw marks, the blood, his blue eyes staring up into the sky lifelessly as she--

The sensation of a tongue on her cheek made her eyes fly open and she saw Beebee standing over her, the beagle whimpering softly as he continued to lick her tears away with what she could only describe as love. 

"B-Beebee? What are you--"

"Rey, is that you?" Rey sat up as soon as she heard Finn's voice, relief flooding her system as she let out a small, choked sound of joy. "Good Lord, what are you doing out here in the canyons so close to dark?! Didn't I tell you to be safe?!" 

"Oh, God--Finn!" She shot up, running over to him and throwing her arms around him as she let out a quiet sob. 

"Rey, sweetheart, you're shaking," Finn spoke softly as he wrapped his arms around her in return, Rey burying her face in her shoulder as she tried her best to not start crying again. She hated crying, it always drained her energy and made her eyes sting. "What happened? Are you okay? Did someone hurt you?" His voice was full of worry and Rey pulled back, wiping her eyes as she sniffled.

"Rey, tell me that's not your blood splattered all over your face--"

"It's Kylo's," She sniffled again and Beebee came running over, the beagle barking as he stood on his hind legs while putting his paws on her left leg. "He came into the church, he--I slashed his face up pretty good, but I got blood all over Father's church--"

"Okay, come on. Come on, let's go to my house, alright? I'll make you coffee with whiskey, but we need to get out of the dark now." She began to hurriedly rush with him to his small house, Beebee happily running along with her with a huge grin on his adorable face. 

\---------------------------------

"Tell us what happened, Rey!" Poe slammed his hands down on Finn's table in his kitchen, he having got there about fifteen minutes ago on horseback. "I saw that wound, what did you do?! How did he even let you--"

"He's not human, he can't be," She whispered as she stared out the window at the inky black night. "No human has those eyes, that presence."

"Rey, you could've _died_!" Poe snapped harshly and she turned her head to look at him. "You could've fuckin' died, and then where would you be?! In a wooden coffin, that's where, and I'll be damned if I ever have to bury you!"

"Poe," Finn spoke quietly as he gently placed his hand on the small of his lover's back, Poe spitting out a broken curse as he looked away. "She's still here, we're lucky for that."

"I don't know what it is he wants with me, but it seems as if he...I can't even begin to tell you the strangeness of his words," Rey furrowed her brows as she stared down at the table. She was trying to make sense of it all, but she found that she just simply couldn't. "He said he'd been searching for me--"

"Oh, great, he probably wants to--to defile you in some horrid way!" Poe nearly shouted and Rey bit her lower lip as she continued to think. "What if he wants to kill you--"

"That's not the case," She stated bluntly. "The air he gave off around me wasn't murderous, it was... _possessive_. I felt like he saw me as this angel, this personal guide to--to something, I don't know! I don't want to think about him anymore!" She slammed her hands down on the table as she stood up, Poe clenching his jaw tightly and Finn looking at her with a sympathetic expression. "None of it makes any sense, and I'm tired and hungry and--"

"I can cook for you!" Finn suddenly chirped and Rey sighed as she hung her head. "I can make chili and I made bread just yesterday!"

"...Sure, Finn, I'd love some chili." She forced a smile and Finn flashed her two thumbs up with a brilliant smile before rushing over to the stove.

\------------------------------

She had scarred him. She had left her permanent mark on him, and he couldn't be happier. 

"You've been staring at the horrendous wound on your face for a good hour now, Ren," Hux sneered and Kylo looked over at him with a pleased expression. "Who'd you let best you in a knife fight?"

"The love of my life, of course," Kylo drawled and Hux looked at him strangely as he slowly sat down beside him on the cot in Kylo's tent. 

"I'm not even going to ask what that possibly even means, but you need to let it heal. I brought food." Hux sighed and Kylo hummed quietly as he looked back down at the hand mirror. To scar someone was to truly love them, and he couldn't he more ecstatic about her love proposal. He was staring at her love proposal right now, and he wanted her to scar him even more. 

"Who did you bring?"

"Another saloon girl, I believe her name is Kaydel. She's currently tied up in my tent crying, if you can't hear her,"

"Oh, that's that annoying sound?" Kylo hummed quietly and Hux stared at him with a displeased expression. 

"Just come eat, will you? I purposely didn't kill her because Gwen told me you were complaining about me again--"

"Because you're a greedy little bastard who never knows when to stop." Kylo put the mirror down and Hux huffed loudly in annoyance. "Am I wrong? Tell me I'm wrong and I'll back off."

"...Shut up, Ren," Hux growled lowly as he got off the cot and booked it out of his tent, Kylo slowly smiling as his thoughts went back to her.

To _Rey_. 

He knew her name now, and he'd never think of another ever again.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I genuinely researched real wolf pack dynamics and ranks for like a good hour and a half for this fic. I used various different websites and articles for my research, and I believe I ranked Phasma and Hux properly ^^ I tried my best to, haha
> 
> Also, this chapter is _exceptionally_ dark. I do apologize-- (corpses are described, please be warned)

He was watching her. He was secretly watching her in the darkness of the canyon, his eyes casting an eerie, reflective golden sheen as he stared up at her form in the window of the small house she had escaped him to. She was smiling and laughing with a beagle in her arms, two men in the room with her who seemed to be laughing as well. He recognized the man from the saloon, but the other he couldn't place at all. Who were they to her? Did she love them?

He had never wanted to kill two people so badly in his entire life. 

It should be him in that room with her, making her laugh and smile. It should be him, not them. Perhaps he could lure them out when she leaves in the morning, perhaps he could tear them to proper shreds and hide the bodies so she thinks they abandoned her.

He'd never abandon her, though, and he was going to make sure he was the only person she'd ever need again. He was going to bite her, ignite the painful turning process in which he'd stay by her side the entire time, and then they could live happily ever after together just like those stories his mother used to read to him when he was but a half pint. 

"Kylo," Phasma hissed quietly from a few feet away while crouching down, Kylo glaring angrily over at her while letting a low growl rumble menacingly in the back of his throat. 

Phasma blinked in shock for a moment before looking towards the house and then back at him, confusion written all over her face.

 _Not a threat_ , his instincts bellowed and Kylo slowly relaxed. _She's not a threat to what is yours._

"...What are you doing here? We already ate," Phasma whispered and Kylo inhaled sharply before looking at her once again. "Was it because the flesh was bitter? Are you looking for seconds?"

"No, my wife is in there," He pointed up at the window and Phasma slowly made her way over there, crouching down beside him as she looked up at Rey through the window. 

"You got _married_? In the few hours you were gone?" Her tone was one of utter shock and her expression matched her tone perfectly. 

"Not yet," Kylo smiled as Rey laughed again, and he thanked his inhuman sense of hearing to be able to hear it as clearly as if she was standing right in front of him. "But in the near future, yes. I've imprinted upon her--"

"You _what_?!" Phasma hissed and Kylo glanced over at her with a dark look in his eyes. "Christ, Kylo, how even old is she?! She looks barely twenty!"

"She's eighteen, can you not smell her age in her blood? On her skin?" Kylo scoffed in annoyance and Phasma glared angrily at him. Phasma was once almost forced into an arranged marriage at seventeen back in England, agreed upon by her parents without her, and her parents were the first people she ever killed. She had then fled to America, where she had run into Kylo numerous years later when she was thirty-two, and he had bitten her in his beast form without even a warning.

"What makes her special?" But Phasma knew werewolves had no control over imprinting, and she'd be damned if she went against her leader's words and decisions. She wasn't looking to get mauled when the full moon came upon them tomorrow. 

"When we first met, she held a shotgun to my face with the most delightful fire in her eyes," Kylo sighed happily and Phasma looked at him with an extremely strange expression. "And the second time we met, she proposed her love by scarring me permanently."

" _She's_ the one that did that to your face?" Phasma gaped and Kylo grinned ecstatically while nodding excitedly. He was too proud, much too proud, of Rey for creating the deepest wound that's ever been on his body. He was as pleased as a pup with two tails, as chipper as a jaybird.

"Ain't she as pretty as a speckled pup?" Kylo smiled over at Phasma and Phasma forced a smile as she nodded. She had never seen him like this before. She knew he was crazy, 'crazy enough to eat the Devil with horns on' as one out here in the West would say, but this was a whole new entire level of crazy. Was this what imprinting did? Or was this just what imprinting did to _him_? 

"She'll be my Luna," Kylo cooed out and Phasma swallowed thickly at the wolf terminology. If they were actual wolves, he would be the Alpha, and he had finally found his mate. Phasma was clearly the Beta, she knew Kylo preferred her as his second (although Betas are seen as third, and she knew she would be third soon) in command over Hux (Hux was most certainly a Delta), but now that he'd found his Luna...what would this mean for their incredibly small pack? Should Phasma be expecting to babysit and care after pups soon? Oh, God, she _despised_ children.

"That's...wonderful, Kylo," Phasma spoke slowly and Kylo nodded quickly with the same excited enthusiasm from before. She could practically see his tail thumping against the ground, and if he was in beast form she was almost certain his tail _would_ be thumping against the ground. "But she's very young, perhaps you could ease into a relationship with her--"

"No, no, no, I can't have anyone else try to claim her," He shook his head vigorously and Phasma hung her head in defeat. Why did she even attempt to reason with him? She had guessed that it was better to try to reason with him than to tell him a straight, flat 'no', because, once again, she really didn't wish to be mauled. 

"I have to get her, I have to bring her back to the campsite and--"

"I don't think she'll come willingly with you, Kylo--I mean...have you seen what she did to your face?"

"Of course, it was her proposal of love. I told you this." Kylo arched a brow and Phasma cursed quietly under her breath. That was the final nail in the coffin for her to realize that he most certainly couldn't be reasoned with on this matter. 

"Besides, she likes me. I know she does, she almost gave herself to me willingly before giving me the ultimate proposal--"

"If you think slashing your face to ribbons is a proposal, I'm terrified to see what the marriage ceremony will bring." Phasma muttered and Kylo only grinned in response as he wiggled his shoulders happily, the man thrilled at the very idea of Rey leaving more wounds on his body. 

"You think she will?" 

"...You're so incredibly strange, you know that? Do you have any idea how psychotic you're coming off right now?"

"Mmn, I don't think 'psychotic' is the right terminology, Cottonmouth," Kylo smirked and Phasma bit the inside of her cheek as she looked up at the window again. The girl was lovely, sure, but what would happen if she didn't survive the bite? Phasma had barely even survived it, and she was just as equally as strong as Kylo. If this girl didn't survive...well, Phasma tried not to think about it.

"Are you going to stay here and watch her until dawn?" Phasma asked and Kylo quickly nodded, Phasma deadpanning in response. Wonderful, now he was going to deprive himself of sleep for this girl, and Phasma was _not_ looking forward to his violent mood swings brought on by his exhaustion the coming morning. 

"Alright, well," She sighed as she ruffled her short platinum blonde hair. "Come back at some point, alright?"

"Mhm," He mumbled and Phasma rolled her eyes before sneaking off back into the shadows of the canyon.

\-------------------------------

_"F-Father, it's okay! It's okay, I've got you!" Rey choked out as she held Reverend Kenobi's body in her arms as she sat on the desert ground on her knees, her entire body trembling as she pressed a hand down against one of the extremely deep claw marks on his chest. "I-I've got you--"_

_"Kira," He breathed out hoarsely with a smile, blood spilling from his lips and staining his white beard. He only used her first name in serious situations, and Rey feared that he was giving up on trying to stay alive. "It may have been the Devil who has taken me, but it is God I shall go to."_

_"No!" She choked out, his warm blood staining her small hands as she desperately tried to stop the bleeding. She could see his internal wounds, his lower intestines hanging out of his stomach and Rey tried to shove them back in a panic. They were steaming with unexplainable heat, the organs wet to the touch. "No, no, you're going to be okay! Father, please!"_

_"My child..." He coughed and Rey couldn't hold back the tears any longer. "It's time."_

Rey woke up nearly screaming, bolting up with her mouth hanging open as a few tears slid down her cheeks. He was just in her arms, he was just...he was just...

Rey breathed shakily as she ran a hand through her hair, looking around the room and naming off every single color she saw silently to calm herself down and to distract her from the nightmare. 

Beebee silently hopped up on the bed and laid down in front of her on his back, letting out a small gruff. "Oh, what's this? You want belly rubs this early?" Rey smiled softly and Beebee let out another gruff, the girl chuckling quietly as she rubbed his belly before gently patting it and getting out of bed. 

Today would be a good day, today was going to be okay. There was no way Kylo could even think of approaching--well, maybe he would. He was by far the craziest man she had ever encountered, and she supposed she should've known from the start because of how he was the most feared outlaw in America. She wondered if Kaydel saw the whole scene go down, and she knew the blonde would exclaim how Rey was her personal hero yet again after telling her that she sliced his face in half.

"Come on, Beebee, I'll take you out." Rey slipped on her dressing gown that lay in the wooden chair besides the small guest bed Finn had let her sleep in. Rey almost always slept nude, she liked having her body be able to breathe at night as she slept. Corsets were so constricting and, at the end of the day, all she wanted was to feel no cloth against her skin whatsoever. 

She quickly left the room after pulling on the dressing gown with Beebee hot on her tail, Rey running down the stairs and opening the screen door with a small smile on her lips. The sun was just coming up, and the air smelled just like it did every early morning. Beebee ran right past her before halting, the beagle looking up at the top of the canyon and growling loudly as he bared his teeth.

"Baby, what is it?" Rey asked as she looked up at the top of the canyon to see--was that a _figure_? "...Go back inside, go wake up Poe and Finn. Go on, go wake up your Papas." Rey spoke lowly and Beebee darted back inside as she slowly walked forward.

Yes, that was a figure, and she knew it was him without even seeing his face. He had _followed_ her here. He had invaded yet another personal sanctuary, and she was simply _not_ having it this time.

"MONSTER!" She screamed. "DEVIL!" Her fists were clenched, her chest heaving as exploding rage consumed her very mind. 

He grinned down at her, crouching down as the grin turned into a smirk. Yes, he adored her anger, and he wanted all of it aimed directly at him. He wanted everything of hers directly aimed at him, he wanted _her_. 

He turned and left the moment he saw the other two men come barreling out of the door with guns in their hands, Kylo growling loudly in anger as he did so.

He really needed to kill them, and he needed to do it soon.

He needed to get Rey alone with him once again so she could feel the intensity of the imprinting, so she could understand that they were and always have meant to be together. She was to be his Luna, and he _needed_ her by his side soon.

 _We could expand the pack_ , He thought as he ran. _We could get Omegas and another Beta and another Delta. We're going to have so many pups, and you're going to be the most wonderful mother to our--_ His thoughts were cut off by a loud gunshot echoing in the air, his ears recognizing it as a warning shot to exclusively him and him alone. 

He hoped it was her firing that gun, he hoped she cared enough to threaten him for a third time.

He looked down and hoped to see her running down beneath him, trying to catch up with him, but she wasn't there. She wasn't coming, she wasn't going to follow him, and a strange pain tugged at his heart that made him whine softly. 

He needed to get her alone.

\----------------------------------------

"What do you mean Kaydel wasn't here last night?" Rey asked with a frightened expression as she stood in front of Madame Holdo at the saloon. It was late afternoon now, Rey having just gotten into the saloon with yesterday's (slightly bloody) outfit on and was heading upstairs to change before her mother figure stopped her.

"She went out last night for a brief walk, but--but she didn't come back," Madame Holdo looked near tears and Rey felt terror clutch her heart tightly in its ghastly claws. "I was hoping she had gone to Finn's to see you, but...I suppose that isn't the case, and--and what if the coyotes--"

"I'm going out right now to find her." Rey's expression hardened as determination settled over her, Madame Holdo frowning before slowly nodding. Rey still needed to tell her about Brandy, and she regretted not telling her earlier because now was _definitely_ not the time. "If Kylo or his gang come in here, I need you to shoot them, Amilyn. Do you understand?"

"I think that's a given," Madame Holdo sighed and Rey quickly nodded. "Please, my darling, be safe for me. Promise me?" Her smile was sad and Rey hesitated before hugging her tightly, the older woman wrapping her arms around her and giving her an equally tight hug. 

"Nothing can kill me, ma'am, haven't you realized that yet?" Rey laughed breathlessly and Madame Holdo only hugged her tightly. "I kill it first."

"Go find her, wild thing," Madame Holdo whispered in her ear before letting her go and Rey gave her a single nod before running out of the saloon and hopping up on Poe's horse. As she rode off, the strangest realization dawned on her.

She hadn't heard any howling whatsoever while she was in the canyons last night. 

If there were coyote attacks, wouldn't there be howling? Wouldn't they make noise? 

She shook her head as Poe's horse began to gallop faster, Rey's hand resting on the gun which lay in a holster on her hip. Finn had given her his pistol, and she most certainly wasn't afraid to use it on a coyote or any other wild animal that tried to approach her. 

Soon, she had been riding around the canyons for a few hours. She had found nothing, nothing whatsoever, and she paused to stop to rest for a moment. She hopped off the horse, going in front of him and gently patted his nose. "You're the sweetest horse ever, you know?" She cooed to the horse as she gently pet his muzzle, the painted horse pressing his muzzle into her hands. 

They were near the stream, she could hear it, and when she looked to the sky, she could see the sun was getting ready to set in thirty minutes time. "Dammit," She murmured under her breath as she pushing her hair back, she having left it down and unstyled today. "I guess we better head back, huh? Maybe Kaydel just...ran off for a few days, she's done that before," She tried to be positive about this situation, tried to not let fear grip her again. 

She looked in the direction of the stream, finding herself walking towards it without thinking. She found herself suddenly running as she saw a glimmer of blonde hair in the sunlight.

"KAYDEL!" Rey screamed as she ran faster, holding her skirt as she ran. "DEL, DEL!" She screamed louder as tears of terror pricked the corners of her eyes, the blonde hair getting closer and closer. "Kaydel, you idiot, what are you--" Rey stopped dead in her tracks as she saw what once was Kaydel in the stream.

One of her arms had been completely torn off, her chest clawed deeply into and Rey could see the broken ribs sticking out through the gaping hole. Her heart was completely missing, the girl's head almost off her body and one of her eyes had been ripped out. Her lower jaw had been ripped off, her tongue hanging limply against her throat as her singular eye stared up at the sky unmoving. 

Rey fell to her knees and vomited, coughing violently as she let out a loud scream as tears began to pour down her face. She was gagging violently, her body trembling as she looked at what was once her best friend. "K-KAYDEL!" Rey screamed as loudly as she could, pounding the ground with her fists as she sobbed uncontrollably. 

Kaydel was dead. Kaydel was _dead_. _Kaydel Ko Connix was dead._ "K-Kaydel..." Rey let out a broken sob as she forced herself to get in the river and hold the corpse tightly against her, Rey letting out yet another scream as she squeezed her eyes shut. 

"H-hug me back, Del...please...hug m-me back..." Rey pleaded in a heartbroken tone, begging God that this was just a terrible nightmare and that she'd wake up any moment. She'd wake up in her bed at the church and Reverend Kenobi would be making breakfast. She prayed that these last five years were just a cruel nightmare, that none of it had happened, but she knew better. Of course she knew better, but it was still nice to believe that this could all possibly just be a child's nightmare. 

She was hyperventilating now, clinging tightly to the corpse of the girl as she looked around frantically. "W-we're gonna go home, okay? You can--you can help me pick out my corset for tomorrow, okay? Y-you're--you're so good with colors--" The tears wouldn't stop and her words were barely even coherent. "Kaydel, Kaydel, we--I--" 

Rey stood there in the stream with her corpse for a whole thirty minutes before she heard a howl incredibly close.

She closed her eyes, and prepared for the coyotes to come. They had finally arrived, and in this moment, she was ready. Kira Rey Kenobi was finally ready to die.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Werewolf Kylo is honestly so pure when it comes to Rey and only Rey, I just--I couldn't help but write him out as a happy puppy--

Her eyes were still closed, her arms still wrapped tightly around Kaydel's corpse, and she heard the howl yet again. She only squeezed Kaydel's corpse tighter, her entire body trembling as she whispered the Lord's prayer to herself.

"O-our--our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven," Rey choked out as the howling grew closer, the young girl refusing to open her eyes. "Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our d-debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from--from e-evil." She whimpered loudly, simply refusing to let go of her best friend's limp corpse.

The howling was getting _so_ close now, and it didn't sound like any coyote she had ever heard. Perhaps she was right, perhaps it truly was the Devil come to wreck havoc upon her small world. 

She would die here, she accepted this. She would die with Kaydel in her arms, she would go to Heaven and see Reverend Kenobi again. She tried to see it as a homecoming, as the ultimate form of peace, but she was still _terrified_. She was going to be ripped apart, she was going to look like Kaydel. She was just going to be another corpse in these cursed canyons, just another body for the buzzards to eat.

She froze as she heard something enter the stream, a low growl erupting from behind her and she cried silently. She decided to be brave in her final moments, to stare her death in its face, as she slowly turned around and opened her eyes. 

She nearly screamed, but the scream died in her throat as terror paralyzed her. There was an eight foot tall _humanoid wolf_ standing over her, its golden eyes burning into hers as it seemed to _smile_ down at her. It's fur was as red as the canyons, its teeth sharp and looking like pearl daggers. Its claws, dear God, its _claws_ , were even sharper and looked even more like daggers. It stood on its hind legs, towering her over like the Devil's judgement. 

"...My God," She choked out loudly, managing to finally find her voice, and it looked down at the corpse in her arms before looking back at her with that same eerily human like smile. "It really is the Devil." Fresh tears slid down her cheeks and the beast leaned in, sniffing her before letting out a pleased growl. It must have been smelling her to see if she smelled decent enough to eat, and by its reaction she guessed she more than certainly did. 

It raised its paw up and Rey squeezed her eyes shut as she tensed up and waited for the impact, but instead she heard the beast yelp loudly as a loud splash was heard right in front of her. Her eyes flew open to see a _much_ larger beast with thick black fur, at least nine and a half feet, snarling down at the other beast loudly as it held it down.

She swore to God that she heard it scream ' _mine_ '. 

The other beast thrashed around violently as it snapped its jaws, the black furred beast looking up at her and blowing air out of its nose in what seemed like an annoyed fashion. She slowly began to back away with Kaydel still in her arms, the black furred beast looking at the corpse and then back at her. It let the rust colored beast up, it jumping out of the stream and taking off quickly. 

The other creature snapped its head back towards her after a moment, its golden eyes glowing brightly in the darkness as it growled loudly. 

Rey nearly dropped Kaydel's corpse, her knees almost giving out as she felt bile burn the back of her throat. 

She knew those eyes. She could _never_ forget those eyes, and the wound on the right side of its face was also a dead giveaway.

"Ky--Kylo--" She choked out and the beast paused in its advances at the sound of its-- _his_ name. "You--you're actually--" Rey felt like she was going to vomit again from pure fear, her stomach churning as she gasped loudly for fresh air. She felt so nauseous, she felt so, so, _so_ sick, and she wanted to collapse into the shallow stream. 

It-- _he_ sniffed the air in her direction, his eyes flicking down to Kaydel's corpse in her arms. He snarled quietly before his eyes flicked back up to hers, Rey's bottom lip quivering as more tears streamed down her cheeks. 

Once again, she had two options. She could either stand there, have him kill/eat her, or she could run as fast as she could back to town. Both options were complete horseshit, but she didn't really have any others. 

She began to back up slowly, each step backwards quickening, and he just stared her down with a curious look in his eyes. The corpse was still in her arms, and she hated that she had to do what she was about to do.

She dropped Kaydel's corpse into the stream, her heart shattering as she did so, before whirling around and running through the stream as fast as she could. It was only seconds before she heard him chasing after her, Rey letting out a panicked scream as she scrambled out of the stream and continued to run on the canyon ground.

She was soaking wet, her clothes sticking uncomfortably to her skin and her heeled boots filled with water, but she wasn't paying attention to that.

She was paying attention to the sound of him barreling after her, the sound of him growling and snarling almost practically right behind her. 

And then she tripped. 

She fell directly on her stomach, gasping loudly as she did so, and in a panic she began to frantically crawl forward. She felt his paw slam down on her back, another scream escaping her lips as he flipped her over.

She stared up into those unearthly golden eyes, his chest heaving as he growled softly down at her.

"J-just do it," She choked out and his eyes seemingly flashed excitedly. "Just kill me," 

He suddenly looked taken aback, the werewolf snorting quietly before leaning down and inhaling the skin of her throat deeply. He sneezed loudly at the corpse scent clinging to her skin, shaking his head violently with his lips curled back to reveal those deadly teeth.

She didn't smell like her anymore, she smelled like that annoying girl he had eaten partially only hours before. He _hated_ it. Where was the honey, the earthly spices? Where was the scent of fire, the scent of unbridled rage?

"Why--why aren't you...eating me...?" Rey breathed out shakily and the werewolf paused before gently nuzzling her jaw affectionately. How could she even think he'd ever want to eat her? No, he loved her. He loved her so much and he never wanted any harm to ever come to her, that's why he had run Hux off. Why was she not understanding that?

"K-Kylo..." She whimpered and he nuzzled her again, the werewolf letting out a happy sound at her saying his name. _Keep saying my name, Rey._

"Please--please, please, please," She didn't even know what she was pleading for. For him to let her go? For him to finally put her out of her misery? She didn't know, she had absolutely no clue, but she was pleading for _something_. Something, anything. Anything at all. Just--just something to stop everything happening at once. "P-please, Kylo--"

He growled happily again and Rey squeezed her eyes shut as she felt his tongue drag up her neck to her cheek. 

_Tastes good_ , his beast like voice grumbled in the back of his mind, his need to claim her as his growing more and more as each second passed. _Luna, my Luna tastes good._ He dragged a claw down her corset, splitting it open to reveal the plain white blouse underneath it and growling louder as he heard her heartbeat pick up.

"W-wait, what are you--" He looked up at her to see fear shining in her eyes, the werewolf letting out a huff of air as he just stared down at her. 

He could take her right here if he truly wanted, he could sink his teeth into her shoulder and ignite the turning process. He could bring her back to the campsite once she passes out from the bite, place her down on the cot and wait for her to wake up. He could stay outside the tent in beast form until the sun came up, then he could go in and crawl beside her and hold her as the fever set in.

He could, but something in the back of his mind told him not to. Something told him that he had to wait, that if he did it now...it would all go wrong. He didn't want it to go wrong, he wanted her to always stay and smile at him and tell him that she loved him and--

"Kylo," She whispered, his eyes blinking as she snapped him from his thoughts. "Let--let me go." She whispered once more and his ears slowly drew back before completely drooping down. He involuntarily let out a small, sad whine and Rey inhaled quickly with wide eyes at the sound of it. Confusion spread across her face and he buried his nose into her neck while letting out another whine.

His nose was cold and wet, Rey cringing slightly at the sensation of it pressed against her skin. Why was he acting like this? Why was he suddenly... _sad_? She didn't understand, she had no clue as to what was going on, and she shakily ran a hand through the fur of his neck without thinking. 

He completely stilled at this, Rey yanking her hand back in fear that she had broken his momentary calmness.

He let out an even louder whine and began to nose her neck roughly, Rey letting out a loud squeak as she hurriedly ran her hand through his fur again. He...wanted to be _pet_? This--this couldn't possibly be happening, right? She was dreaming? She _had_ to be dreaming.

"U-um," She bit her lower lip as she tried to process the situation, but her mind kept drawing blank. "Your--your fur is...soft...?" Her pitch got higher towards the end, deciding that perhaps pleasing him was the only way for him to let her go. She couldn't very well fight him off, could she now?

His tail began to wag violently, a happy growl escaping his lips as he pulled back to look at her with the most excited eyes she had ever seen. "It's...very thick and silky," She forced a smile and he _yipped_.

 _She likes my fur!_ His tail was thumping loudly against the ground, Rey laughing nervously as he grinned. _She thinks my fur is nice, she likes my fur! She likes my fur!_

"Y-you groom yourself? You're so...good at it!" She was internally panicking, trying to think of how she could possibly escape this situation. This version of Kylo was really just an overgrown dog, in all honesty, but she was still beyond terrified of this form. She wanted to leave--no, no, she _needed_ to leave, but he was still on top of her holding her down against the ground. 

"How about you, um, let me up, and...I can see you...tomorrow?" Rey swallowed and he suddenly stilled, his ears going back once again as his eyes grew sad. "Okay?" She forced yet another smile, the werewolf whining quietly as he slowly lifted his paw off of her. 

He didn't want her to go, he wanted her to stay right here with him and keep complimenting him. Maybe she was hungry? Tired? He could go off and get her--she wouldn't really like a dead rabbit, though, would she? 

He got off of her with his ears still down, looking down and away as she quickly got up. She let out a shaky breath as she turned to run, only to stop and look back at him to see him staring longingly at her.

"...Goodbye, Kylo," She spoke softly before running off and he let out a small whimper as he plopped down on the ground.

_Rey...come back..._

\----------------------------------

The moment she had gotten back to the saloon, she had ran right up to her room and started packing what little she had (she was thankful there were only a few stragglers in the saloon and that Madame Holdo was nowhere in sight). Like hell she was sticking around until tomorrow! She wasn't going to give that psycho devil mutt a chance of seeing her face again, and she planned on hiking to the nearest railroad station and getting on a train with the farthest destination. 

She quickly scribbled a note for Finn, Poe, and Madame Holdo with a charcoal pencil before slamming it down on her dresser and running back downstairs and out the door with her back and a fresh set of clothes on.

She wasn't going to let him near her ever again.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof, I am so sorry I haven't updated this fic in a hot minute! This chapter is short, and I do apologize for that, but I promise the next one will be longer!

Rey sat in a train car filled with cargo, silently fiddling with her hair as she stared out the open door of the train car. She had snuck on around dawn, huddling up in the corner and waiting until the next stop to hop off.

She had no idea where the train was going, nor did she care. She was visibly upset that she had to leave her home, her friends, all because of... _him_. 

He had ruined everything, he had had to just come into her town and--God, she _still_ didn't understand what he wanted with her. He hadn't of even hurt her in his...'wolf' form, he had just acted like this ridiculous overgrown puppy. 

"Fucking bastard..." She muttered as she leaned her head back against the metal wall, closing her eyes as she inhaled slowly through her nose. 

Her eyes snapped open the moment she heard a horse galloping in the distance, the girl bolting up with wide eyes as she quickly hid behind a cargo box. _It's just a wild horse, there is no way in hell that he_ \--

"REY!" _Well, fuck._ That was _his_ voice, and he sounded beyond infuriated. She quickly pulled the pistol from the holster on her hip, cocking it and leaning out of the train car to shoot at him.

He dodged the bullet, his eyes wide with disbelief that she had actually shot at him. "Did you actually just try to shoot me?!"

"You're damn fucking right!" She spat as she shot again, Kylo growling loudly as he dodged it again as his horse sped up.

"You said you'd see me--"

"And you actually believed me?! Are you stupid in your Devil dog form?!" She spat again and he narrowed his eyes before jumping off his horse onto the train, landing perfectly on his feet and hands as he glared up at her.

She pointed the gun directly at his head, her chest heaving as she gave him an equal glare. He slowly grinned and laughed as he got up, brushing the dust off his clothes as he looked around. In Kaydel's words, he was grinnin' like a weasel in a hen house, and she was beginning to feel like a hen.

"You got yourself a nice little place, huh? Lookie here at all this--what is this, darlin'? Gunpowder?" He chuckled as he looked at a cargo box, Rey standing perfectly still with the gun still pointed at his head. "It seems a little dangerous for you to be shootin' off a gun in a train car full of gunpowder. I'd hate for you to blow yourself up."

"Why are you following me?" She hissed out as her vision swam with red, rage the only emotion she felt in this moment. "I held a shotgun to your head, I sliced your face in half, and I just now shot at you twice, and yet you're still here!"

"You're threatenin' me because you love me," He hummed with a smirk as he took the lid off of one of the cargo boxes, grabbing a handful of gunpowder in his black leather gloved hands as he looked over at her. "You're just not gettin' that yet, but you will in time."

"You know _nothing_ about me--"

"I know more about you than you even know yourself--"

"But I know everything I need to know about you!" She spat with venom and Kylo looked her up and down before smiling.

"You do?" He stated before chuckling and nodding as he dropped the handful of gunpowder back into the box. "Ah, you do. You have that look in your eyes. From the church. You called me a monster."

"You _are_ a monster!"

"Yes," He walked over to her, Rey tensing up as she felt frozen by his gaze just like she did in the church. "I am." He gently pushed her hand down so the gun was no longer pointed at him, Rey's breath hitching as he caressed her cheek with the most tender touch a man had ever given her. 

"W-what are you doing to me..." She breathed out and Kylo only smiled. "Stop..."

"I'm not doin' anything to you, Rey," Her eyes went wide by her name coming from his lips. "But you feel somethin', don't you? Don't be afraid, I feel it too."

"W-what--what is it I'm feeling...?" She pressed her back up against the train car, Kylo suddenly grabbing one of her legs and putting it on his hip as he slowly pushed her skirt up. God, the sensation of his leather glove against her bare skin was doing things to her she couldn't even begin to fathom. She suddenly felt as if she had been struck with a fever, like her very blood was on fire, and a soft moan escaped her lips as he gripped her inner thigh.

"I imprinted on you the moment you held a shotgun to my head," He breathed out as he leaned down to her neck, the brunette's eyes fluttering closed as she dropped the gun on the ground. "I made you _mine_ by simply just lookin' at you." 

"And what if...I don't want to be yours?" She asked breathlessly as he pushed his hips into hers, a small noise escaping her throat as he did so.

"You don't exactly have a choice." She felt him grin against her neck and the rage came over her again, the young girl letting out a scream as she pushed him away. She pounced on him, knocking him to the ground and punching him as hard as she could in the nose. 

Kylo laughed loudly as blood gushed from his nose, his tongue darting up and licking the red substance from his upper lip as his eyes flashed excitedly. "Oh, darlin', _yes_!"

"YOU'RE FUCKING INSANE!" She screamed as she punched him again and he laughed louder, throwing his head back in pure delight at her anger. "YOU'RE A PSYCHOPATH!"

"God, _yes_!" He grinned maniacally as he stared up at her, hot tears pricking the corners of her eyes as she tried her best not to hyperventilate. "Destroy me, Rey, give me every ounce of fire in you!" 

"W-WHY--why are you enjoying this?!" Her scream died down to a broken tone, a few tears escaping her eyes and sliding down her cheeks. "Do I have to kill you to make you leave me--"

"Yes," His expression grew dark, his eyes glowing golden up at her. "Yes, you'll have to kill me, because I am _never_ going to stop chasin' you."

"...Then I'll fucking kill you," She reached for the gun but he flipped her over, pinning her wrists down and glaring down at her. She flinched as the blood from his nose dripped on her face, Rey attempting to break free but all her efforts went to waste. He was too strong, there was no way she'd be able to get out from underneath him. 

"As much as I love your fire, it doesn't have to be like this. Just give in, Rey. Just give yourself to--"

"I will _never_!" She spit at him, her saliva hitting his cheek and he didn't even blink. "The only way you'll ever have me is if I'm a corpse!"

"STOP DENYING ME!" He screamed and Rey flinched once again as she hissed quietly up at him in defiance. "I ran Hux off for you, didn't I?! I made sure he didn't hurt you, didn't I?!"

"YOU KILLED KAYDEL--"

"IT IS NOT MY FAULT HUX CHOSE HER!" She swore his upper and lower canines looked sharper than usual, Rey thrashing around beneath him once again but his grip on her wrists only tightened. "God, were you--you lied about likin' my fur, didn't you?!"

Rey stilled at this as a sound of confusion escaped her lips. Was--was he actually upset about that? That's what he was pissed about? His _fur_?

"I made sure my tail was particularly fluffed up--"

Oh, my God.

"--and that my fur was clean--"

He _was_.

"A-and you just lied to my face about that?!" He snarled and Rey blinked before bursting into laughter. She couldn't help it, he was _upset_ because she had lied about liking his _fur_. "It's not funny!"

"Yes, it is!" She laughed louder and he growled loudly with an expression mixed with hurt and anger. "Y-yes, it is! You're genuinely upset because I used complimenting your fur as a tactic to get you to let me leave!"

She stopped laughing after a moment, catching her breath as she fought back dying chuckles. "You're _pathetic_."

"...Maybe I am," He spoke quietly and Rey's smile slowly disappeared as she saw the genuine hurt in his eyes. "But I'm not leavin'."

"I have a feeling you never will, no matter what I say." She huffed as she hit her head back against the floor, staring up at the ceiling with a frustrated expression.

"Don't make it like that, darlin', being imprinted can be a beautiful thing," He sighed and Rey glared at him. "It can be incredible."

"Incredibly intrusive, you mean." Rey sneered and Kylo deadpanned before leaning down and nuzzling her jaw affectionately.

"Come back to Niima Outpost with me, Rey. We'll go to my camp, and then we can pack up in the mornin' and go to wherever you want," He spoke quietly once more and Rey bit the inside of her cheek as she glared daggers up at the ceiling. "And when full moon comes next month, I can give you the bite and we won't ever have to be separated again."

Rey completely froze at this, her eyes widening in horror at his words. _The...bite...? He--he's going to make me like him?!_

"N-no," She tried to writhe around again as new tears pricked her eyes. "No, no, no, I'm not becoming like you! I-I'm not becoming like you!"

"Oh, darlin'..." He sighed as he rested his head against her shoulder. "It hurts me to see you upset like this, you know that? It hurts my own poor, little ol' heart."

She squeezed her eyes shut as she prayed that this was all a nightmare, that she'd wake up and be alone on the train car. 

"My poor Luna...you're so upset and all I wanna do is help but you're not lettin' me," Kylo sighed softly and Rey finally went limp beneath him. "Just let me help you, Rey."

She finally gave up, knowing there was nothing she could possibly do anymore, and she closed her eyes as only one thought went through her mind:

_"Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned."_


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof, is Rey catching feelings? The world may never know.

"Is this really necessary?" Rey hissed out as Kylo chuckled softly. He had tied her hands together with rope and was holding said rope as he rode his stallion, Rey walking along beside him as she glared up at him. "I'm not an outlaw nor a criminal, unlike _you_."

"I'm sorry, darlin', but I can't exactly have you tryin' to rip my throat out with your bare teeth while you sit behind me, now can I?" _I wouldn't be against that in the bedroom, though._

"This is humiliating!"

"Well then, lucky for you ain't no one 'round here to see it, huh?" He smirked down at her and she snarled in his direction before looking forward with a scowl. _Damn you, Kylo Ren. Damn you and your weird obsession with me, and damn you for imprinting on me. Whatever the hell that is in the first place._

"Do you know how many miles it is back into Niima Outpost, Kylo? You're really going to make me walk all the way there with this godawful, scratchy rope tied around my--hey!" Rey snapped as he jerked her forward, Kylo chuckling louder with the smuggest expression on his face.

"I can't have you trudgin' behind too much, Rey," She hated that she got shivers each time he said her name. "And maybe if you promise not to spook Starkiller here--"

"Starkiller? You named your horse _Starkiller_? Good God, you really do try too hard, don't you? You're so bloody pretentious!" Rey scoffed and Kylo glanced over at her. He could see the beads of sweat on her forehead, the beads gently sliding down to her temples. 

"...Here," He leaned down and handed his canteen to her, Rey hesitating and looking at it suspiciously. "Oh, come on now, it's just Adam's ale!"

"Do you mean _water_?" She arched a brow and he automatically grinned. He loved the way she said 'water', it sounded like 'wahta' coming from her lips. Her accent was just to adorable sounding to him, even when she did try to spit out venom in her tone at every God given chance she got.

"Yes, exactly that. I don't want you passin' out from the heat."

"How generous of you," Rey muttered before taking a few sips, a small bit of water sliding down the side of her mouth as she did so. He wanted to hop off of his horse and take her right there, lick the trail of water from her skin and make her scream his name up to the sky.

"You can drink it all," His voice was husky and Rey involuntarily shuddered as she slammed the cap back on, shoving the canteen back at him with defiance shining in her eyes. "Or not." He smirked as he took it back.

"So, tell me, Kylo," Rey spoke coldly as she looked back forward. "What exactly is it that you're planning on doing with me? Because I refuse to give up ever again like I did back in the train car. I think you'll find that I'm a very stubborn woman."

"Ah, but you see," Kylo grinned as he uncapped the canteen and took a swig. "That's one of the reasons why I love you."

Rey choked on her own spit as her cheeks burned red and Kylo laughed loudly as he threw his head back.

"L-love?! Jesus, are you off your wagon?! You don't _know_ me!"

"Mmn, I think I know you well enough." Kylo purred out and Rey scowled yet again as she looked away. 

An hour later and she was beyond exhausted from walking, the summer sun beating down on her and her throat felt like it had been scratched up by the dogs. She stopped for a moment before she nearly tripped, panting quietly as she looked down.

"Rey?" Kylo pulled Starkiller to a halt, the horse neighing and slamming a hoof on the ground as he did. "Rey, are you--"

"I-I'm fucking fine," Rey bit out as she glared up at him and he only stared down at her with an unreadable expression. "Just--just give a moment, will you? You haven't been walking for miles in blasted heeled boots."

"You're in pain?" He instantly hopped off his horse and he pulled her close to him by the rope, Rey gasping quietly as her body hit his. He smelled strongly of leather and earth, a mix of patchouli and paprika sprinkled in there somewhere as well, and she wondered why she was just realizing that now. 

"Do I look like I'm in pain, Kylo?" She sneered and he pressed his lips together before clicking his tongue. "I'm fine--"

"You're obviously not, and I really wish you wouldn't lie to me." He grabbed her chin between his thumb and index finger, tilting her chin up to look at him. "Tell me what you need."

"What I _need_?! What I need is to get away from you and get back on that damned train, but it's too late now!" She spat before hissing under her breath as she nearly fell to her knees, the heat getting to her. 

"Are you gonna kill me?"

"What?"

"If I undo the rope, are you gonna try and kill me?" He asked again and Rey's lips parted as she stared up at him. 

"...No," She whispered and Kylo nodded before letting go of her chin and grabbing a hunting knife from his belt, slicing the rope and it fell to the ground.

"There we go, all bet--"

She cracked him in the jaw as hard as she could, Kylo barely even flinching as he deadpanned. She hissed in pain as she shook her hand, her fist throbbing from the impact. It hadn't hurt to punch his nose this much, why was his jaw any different?

"You done?" Kylo spoke in an annoyed tone and Rey grumbled to herself before quickly nodding as she cradled her wrist in her other hand. "Good, get on the horse."

"Did that really not hurt you...?" She looked at him and he only stared back. "Christ, what is your jaw made out of? Marble?"

"If you're sayin' I got a nice jawline, I'm all about it," He got back on the horse and then proceeded to pull her up, Rey sitting behind him and crossing her arms across her chest. "But I really would appreciate it if you stopped fightin' me for one second. As much as I love it, I really, _really_ do, we need to get back to camp before dark. Now, hold on to me--"

"No." Rey stated bluntly and Kylo bit back a smile as he grabbed the reins. 

"You're gonna fall off if you don't, darlin', and believe me, you don't want to fall off of a horse. It hurts."

"...I am not putting my arms around you, so help me God." She placed her hands on his sides hesitantly and Kylo shook his head as he laughed quietly.

"You sure about that?" He gently nudged Starkiller's side with his boot (he knew better than to kick like most men with their horses because Starkiller was a force to be reckoned with) and Rey yelped loudly as the horse took off, the young girl immediately clinging to him and burying his face in his shoulder.

"I hate you, I hate you, I hate you!" Rey shouted and Kylo laughed loudly in response. 

\-----------------------------------

Rey had fallen asleep before they had gotten back to the camp, Kylo quietly getting off of the horse and pulling her off as he carried her bridal style to his tent.

"Kylo--"

"Shh," Kylo whispered as Phasma stuck her head out of her own tent, the blonde's eyes going wide at the sight before her. "She's asleep, she's had a long day."

"She come with you willingly?" Phasma whispered and Kylo nodded. "Christ...Christ, Kylo, congratulations..."

"On what?"

"I can smell her fire from here, and by the sight of your nose I can tell she put up a hell of a fight." Phasma scoffed and Kylo chuckled softly before going into his tent, laying Rey down on his cot and smoothing her hair back and out of her face.

She looked so peaceful asleep, her chest rising and falling steadily as she shifted slightly. "Shh, you're okay," He breathed out as he got on top of her, nuzzling her neck affectionately as he breathed in her scent. "You're home, Rey, you're finally home."

\-----------------------------------

Rey awoke around dawn to the tent empty, the brunette slowly sitting up and looking around. She could hear soft talking outside, both voices with accents similar to her own.

"No, no, look," This was the male's voice. "There's no way in hell she's not going to try and sneak out the moment she wakes up! You saw what she did to his nose, right? And his face? I mean, his face is already healed by now into a scar--"

"He called it a 'love proposal'," The woman's voice this time. "Can you imagine? I told him I was terrified of what the wedding ceremony would bring! What are they going to do, cut each other's hands off and then present them to each other instead of rings?"

Rey's expression soured at this, gagging silently as she shook her head. 

"Could she really be a Luna though if he bites her? Could you tell by her scent?" The male asked and Rey silently moved closer to the tent flap.

"No, I can't tell, she smells too much like him right now. His scent is _all_ over her like...what's the saying Kylo says? 'Flies on honey'?"

"Oh, God, don't even start with these ridiculous American sayings." The man muttered and Rey crouched down as she peeped out the small opening in the flap.

She could see them both and--red hair. The man had red hair. Rey saw red in that moment as Kaydel's body flashed in her mind, the young girl bolting up and grabbing the pistol near the cot. She was about to storm out when she suddenly heard Kylo speaking, Rey scowling and throwing the gun on the cot. 

The gun fired off on accident the moment it hit the cot and she let out a loud yelp, the tent flap being ripped open to reveal a frightened Kylo.

"I didn't--it just--I--the gun--" Rey stammered out and Kylo sighed in relief at her not being hurt. "I wasn't--I just saw...red hair...Kaydel..."

"Oh." Kylo blinked before pausing and exiting the tent, Rey hearing the redheaded man yelp and then the sound of dragging.

Kylo dragged Hux into Hux's tent, Hux hissing quietly as he gently pushed him away. "What the hell, Ren--"

"You killed one of her friends the other night," Kylo's voice was dangerously low and Hux instinctually cowered in front of him. "Her name was Kaydel, and you murdered her. Rey was about to go out there and shoot you, and I'd like for you to give me a reason to not let her do it."

"Are you...being serious right now...?" Hux frowned and Kylo nodded. "...Ren, that girl was just a human, and you participated in eating her as well--"

"You upset my Luna," Kylo growled loudly and Hux let out a small whine as he shrunk down. If he was in wolf form, his ears would be all the way back and down. "And when she's upset, I'm upset."

"I-I didn't know, how was I supposed to know?! Come on, Ren, this--this is what we are, you can't be mad at me for following my instincts! You made me like this, remember?" Hux breathed shakily in an irritated tone and Kylo only growled louder.

"Hey, yeah, excuse me," Phasma opened up the tent flap and both of them looked at her. "She's demanding food? She told me she'd 'kick me into next week' if she can't go and wash off in the stream?"

"Oh, that's my Luna," Kylo sighed dreamily and Hux scowled as he looked away. "She loves threatenin' people, it's adorable."

"Yeah," Phasma nodded as her voice cracked slightly. "She's, uh...super adorable with a gun in her hand, mhm."

"She's got a _gun_?! I'm going to die!" Hux sat down on his cot as he held his head in his hands, Kylo quickly leaving the tent to see Rey by the dead campfire with a gun in her hand sure enough.

"Phasma is funny, I like her." Rey sighed as she looked at him, Kylo approaching her and holding his hand out with a stern expression. "What?"

"Gun,"

"No! No way in hell, this is for my own protection against the redheaded beast of a man!"

"He ain't gonna mess with you, give me the gun. _Now_." He held his hand out further and Rey bit the inside of her cheek before groaning loudly in frustration and handing it to him. "Good girl."

 _Oh._ Those two words sent heat spiraling through her like no other, Rey clenching her jaw as she pressed her thighs together tightly and looked away. _Remember that you hate him, Rey. No matter how attractive he is, remember that you hate him._

"I'm going to the stream and you're not going to stop me," Rey breathed out and Kylo tilted his head to the side with a thoughtful expression. "Is that understood? I'm not stupid enough to run away anymore but you can't stop me from bathing--"

"I'll come with you."

"W-wha--no! No!" Rey choked as she shook her head violently and Kylo slowly smirked. "No, you're not coming with me to bathe!"

"Why not? We're technically mates, we'll see each other bare soon enough--"

" _Excuse me_?!" Rey snapped and both Phasma and Hux darted their heads out of the tent. "Are you _joking_?! If you want to fuck me, you'll have to pay like everybody else down at that goddamned saloon!"

"...No." Kylo's expression hardened and Rey clenched her fists tightly by her side as she frothed over with anger. "No, and frankly, I'm a little ticked off you even just said that."

"Oh, _you're_ ticked off?! Well, my sincerest apologies, but I'm not just going to let you fuck me for free, and I don't even want to fuck you in the first place!"

"I can't believe you let people pay you to fuck you in the first place! Your virginity should've been _mine_!"

"Oh, _fuck_ you, you pretentious," She shoved him harshly backwards. "Egotistical," Shove. "Narcissistic," Shove. "Psychopathic," Shove. "Pompous," Shove. "Psychotic devil dog man thing!" She shoved him one last time as her chest heaved, her breathing heavy and her face red with rage.

"The sexual tension is astounding," Phasma muttered and Hux stifled a laugh.

"Are you done?" Kylo hissed and Rey screamed in fury at him before turning on her heel and stomping off towards the stream.

Kylo groaned loudly before putting his hands on his hips and hanging his head. "Rey, come back here! Rey, I'm--"

"FUCK YOU, KYLO REN! FUCK YOU AND THE HORSE YOU RODE IN ON!" Rey screamed at the top of her lungs as she continued to walk quickly, Kylo shouting loudly in aggravation as he kicked the red dirt beneath him.

\-----------------------------------

When Rey had gotten to the stream, she had immediately stripped and gotten in. She nearly cried at the cool water, cupping her hands and bringing them up to her lips to take a long needed sip of the clear liquid. In that moment, that water tasted like the best thing in the entire world.

She had brought soap amongst other things with her that she had stolen from Kylo's tent, scrubbing at her body mercilessly with the soapy rag as she thought about how Phasma had said she smelled like Kylo.

She didn't want to smell like him, she wanted to smell like anything other than him, but she knew she wasn't doing herself any favors by using his soap. 

"Rey," Rey nearly screamed at Kylo's voice, quickly covering her breasts and private area as she turned her head to the side to glare at him. He was crouched down by the edge of the stream, his eyes soft and apologetic. "Darlin', I'm sorry, I said some pretty mean things back there--"

"You don't own me, Kylo! My virginity was never yours in the fucking first place!" Rey spat and Kylo inhaled sharply as he looked her up and down. "S-stop looking at me like that!"

"Lookin' at you like what?" He murmured and Rey continued to glare at him. "Like you're a five course meal and I haven't eaten in days?"

" _Yes_!" Rey bristled and Kylo hummed quietly as his eyes went to her breasts that were being shielded from his eyes by her arm. 

"But I'm starvin'." Those three words sent shivers down her spine and she instantly looked away, chewing her lower lip in a mixture between nervousness and anger.

"That...is not how you come on to women..." Rey spoke quietly and Kylo scoffed with a smile as he looked down.

"With my kind, we normally just hold down our mates and have them any way we want," Kylo looked back up at her and Rey looked at him in terror. "But I'm not gonna do that you. Not now, not ever, because you're not just another Omega to slap around or a Beta to command. You're a Luna, and you deserve respect, and I'm gonna give you that respect in every which way I can."

"...Then turn around," Rey swallowed and Kylo immediately stood up, turning around as he grinned. _This is a start, right? She's not screamin' at me to leave, I think this is a good start._

Rey began to scrub her body again while looking over at him every few minutes to see if he was looking at her, but he never was. He was sitting down now, his face pointed up to the sky with his eyes closed. With the running water and the blueness of the sky above them, Rey almost found the scene peaceful. Almost.

"I made you food," Kylo broke the silence as she turned around and grabbed the towel laying beside him as she got out of the stream. "I made you rabbit, I hope that's okay. I don't exactly think you'll like what I eat--"

"No, I wouldn't, because I'm not a cannibal." Rey huffed as she dried herself off, Kylo having to force himself to not turn around and pounce on her. "But thanks for making me food."

"Mhm..." Kylo clenched his jaw as her scent overwhelmed him, his upper and lower canines extending involuntarily as his eyes flew open. _Smells so fuckin' good. Smells so, so, so fuckin' good. Need her. Need her now._

"I, um," Rey sighed as she began to get dressed, only putting on her blouse and skirt. Screw the tights, she wanted her legs to breathe. "I'd like to go to California next, if you don't mind. I know I can't run away from you, there's absolutely no point in even trying, so...California sounds fine to me."

"Mhm." He was silently panting now, his eyes half lidded as his irises glowed. _Need. Need now. Need Luna now. Breed, mate, pups._

"...I can't believe I'm about to ask this, but are you alright?" Rey crouched down beside him and his head whipped towards her, Rey letting out a small yelp as she nearly fell backwards.

"Instincts," He mustered out and Rey quickly nodded with a slightly frightened look in her eyes. "Instincts, sorry. Instincts."

"I..." Rey hated that there was a small part of her pleading to kiss him, to feel his gloves on her thighs again, and she desperately tried to push that voice deep down where the sun don't shine, but it only went straight to her cunt. "I...okay...instincts..."

"Instincts." Kylo repeated as he looked away, Rey instantly standing up and nervously began to fiddle with the loose string on her blouse. 

"Instincts..." She echoed. 

_I'm fucked._


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The word 'promiscuous' in this context means 'reckless, careless'. 
> 
> Also, I'm so sorry this chapter is short, I promise the next one will be longer! I'm just kinda having a low on creativity right now, I do apologize ;w;
> 
> Edit: Is this chapter showing up for anyone? It's not showing up on any of my other devices unless I click 'entire work'-- Like--

Rey was sitting at the unlit campfire near sunset across from Hux, the redhead purposely ignoring her gaze as he drew circles in the dirt with his index finger. Kylo and Phasma had gone out to get food (Rey was planning on hiding in the tent when they came back and forcing herself to go to sleep) and so she was stuck with Hux.

She was stuck with the son of a bitch who had killed Kaydel.

"So, um--"

"I hate you." Rey shot out harshly and Hux pressed his lips together tightly before nodding quickly and going back to being silent.

Rey had absolutely nothing to say to this man, no words could be spoken to describe her hatred for him, and all she wanted to do was kill him. She wanted to rip apart his body just like he had done with Kaydel's.

"...Can you just--"

"I. Hate. You." Rey spoke each word individually, each word having more venom than the last. "I could kill you right now and feel positively no remorse whatsoever."

"You two really were made for each other," Hux muttered as he continued to look down, Rey sneering at him in disgust before looking away. "I wonder if you're just as mad as he is."

"I am nowhere near delusional as him, thanks," Rey hissed out and Hux glanced up at her. "In fact, I don't even want to be here in the first place! But no, no, the bastard 'imprinted' on me, and now I'm doomed to become whatever the hell it is you things are!"

"We have many names," Hux smirked and Rey glared at him. "Lycanthrope, wolfman, werewolf...and numerous others in numerous other languages."

"You're all the Devil to me," Rey narrowed her eyes angrily and Hux chuckled quietly as he looked back down. "You're all going to Hell one way or another."

"And you'll be dragged down with us, my darling."

Rey stiffened at his words and looked down, clutching the ends of her skirt so tightly in her hands that her knuckles turned white. _I'm not going to Hell. I'm never going to Hell, never. Never, never, never. I'm going to heaven to meet Father Kenobi and Kaydel when I die, and that's final._

"Aw, did I strike a nerve? Are you highly religious, Rey? Wait...you are, aren't you? You were saying the Lord's Prayer when I was coming after you on the full moon. Oh, how rich, Kylo Ren imprinted on a Christian girl! How does God love you when you sell your body to complete and utter--"

"How could you speak of God when you have fallen so far from Him?" Rey ground out as she stood up, Hux slowly grinning. "You have no say when it is you who has strayed far from the path of the righteous!"

"'The righteous'?" Hux laughed as he shook his head. "Oh, you innocent little girl, when will you realize that your holy book is utter shite?"

"At least I still have my faith!"

"But do you really?" Hux leaned forward, his amber eyes glowing with the setting sun. "Do you really still have faith in your God when you saw what the Devil was capable of to your whore of a friend?"

"FUCK YOU!" Rey screamed as she ran at him, knocking him off of the log and punching him as hard as she could in the nose. Hux screamed as blood gushed out but Rey didn't stop. She couldn't stop, she wouldn't stop. Not until he was just as dead as Kaydel was. "FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU!" 

"REY!" Kylo screamed as he came over the horizon, Rey continuing to attempt (she was slowly succeeding) beating the man beneath her to death. Kylo ran over and grabbed her off of him and she kicked and screamed as she did so, hot tears of anger streaming down her face as she twisted and turned violently in his arms.

"L-LET ME FUCKING KILL HIM! HE CALLED KAYDEL A WHORE--"

"HE'S NOT WORTH IT!" Kylo screamed back and Rey let out an animal scream as she continued to try to break away from him. 

Phasma rushed over and quickly fell to her knees beside Hux, examining his face as Hux turned his head to the side to spit out blood before growling loudly in pain. 

"Oh, shut up, Hux," Phasma sighed and Hux glared up at her. "It's just a broken nose and slightly fractured jaw...looks like she bursted quite a few blood vessels in your eyes..."

"You shut up," Hux bit out hoarsely before coughing violently, spitting up more blood as he shook with rage. "Fuck off, the lot of you!"

Kylo held Rey tighter in his arms as she began to calm down, her chest still heaving as he buried his face in her hair while shushing her comfortingly. 

"L-let me go..." Rey breathed shakily and he hesitated for a moment before reluctantly letting her go, Rey storming off to his tent and disappearing inside of it.

Kylo glared angrily over at Hux and Hux huffed loudly before groaning and closing his eyes. "It is not my fault, Ren...the truth hurts--"

"What I should do is let her kill you in whatever fashion she sees fit," Kylo snapped and Hux reopened his eyes. "But we got another problem on our hands and we need to start movin' fast."

"Another problem...?"

"We caught the scent of other werewolves in the area, we believe they've come because they've smelled us," Phasma muttered and Hux laughed before wincing in pain. "It'll be a whole territory thing and I don't think any of us are looking to engage in it."

"And we're bringing her with us, aren't we?" Hux hissed out and Kylo took a step forward with a warning growl. "Lovely."

"She's one of us now--"

"Is she, Ren? Is she _really_? Because it honestly seems to me that she doesn't wish to be here with us whatsoever. In fact, she even just told me she didn't want to be here before pummeling me like a wild animal!" Hux sneered and Phasma whacked him on the head, the redhead yelping loudly.

"He's Alpha, he knows best--"

"And she's bloody _human_! This is ridiculous! Phasma, this is ridiculous, you know it is!"

"He's _Alpha_ ," Phasma growled as she glared down at him. "And he knows _best_."

"You're only saying that because you don't want him to maul you..." Hux murmured dryly and Kylo inhaled sharply before turning on his heel and walking to his tent. 

"Hey, darlin', are you--"

"Why did you stop me?" Rey was sitting on the cot with a loaded gun in her hand, her eyes glaring daggers into his. "You know what he did, what he did to Kaydel, and you stopped me. Why did you stop me?"

"...Because now isn't the time--"

"The--the _time_?! It wasn't Kaydel's time to go either, and yet she's dead now! Her corpse is being picked away by buzzards and wild animals as we speak, where was her time?!" Rey stood up and Kylo glanced down at the gun in her hand before looking back up at her. 

"Sometimes...things happen that we don't want them to," He cautiously took a step forward and Rey stood perfectly still. "Things that are incredibly painful and dark, things that we wish are just nightmares, but you know what?" He slowly reached for the gun and Rey looked up at him warily. "We have no control over these things, and the sooner we realize that, the better."

"I have control over this gun right now," She narrowed her eyes and Kylo's hand hovered over hers. "I don't think it'd be a nightmare if I shot you, in fact, I think it'd be the best dream I've ever had."

"You say such hurtful things," Kylo muttered and Rey inhaled slowly. "You know that?"

"And you're a monster," She thrust the gun into his hand and Kylo winced. "You know that?" She stormed out of the tent and Kylo stared after her, sighing deeply as he looked down. _I really fucked up everything, didn't I?_

"Phasma!" Rey barked and Phasma cursed loudly. "Do you have any clothes you don't wear and a sewing kit?"

"I--yes?"

"Great," Rey marched over to Phasma's tent. "Let's hope whatever clothes I grab are ones you don't wear."

"Or I could just--and you're already inside the tent." Phasma sighed loudly and Hux chuckled weakly from where his head was in her lap.

\------------------------------------------------------

"I hate this," Rey whispered as she sat behind Kylo on his horse, her hands planted firmly on her thighs as she glared to the side. "I'm stealing my own horse when we get to the next town."

"You can do that, yeah," Kylo murmured and Rey looked down. 

"...I also don't appreciate how fast Hux is healing."

"It's a werewolf thing," Kylo sighed loudly and Rey felt like everything was...off. He wasn't being his obnoxiously smug self as usual, he hadn't been since the interaction in his tent, and he'd been quiet almost the entire hour they'd been on the road. Hux and Phasma were trailing behind them, Rey hearing them converse in low tones, but Kylo had barely even said one word until this moment.

"...I hemmed Phasma's pants to fit me,"

"I saw."

"Aren't you going to make some comment about how starving you are seeing me in them?"

"And why would I do that?" Kylo's tone was lifeless, like he genuinely didn't care, and it was starting to piss Rey off. She should be glad that he'd stopped being creepily obsessive, but it was honestly annoying her that he wasn't.

"...And what if I just hopped off of this horse right now?"

"You can walk, that's fine," Kylo shrugged and Rey narrowed her eyes angrily as she crossed her arms. "It's up to you."

"Fine!" Rey snapped as she hopped off of Starkiller and angrily walked ahead of him, only being able to because the horses were going a leisurely stride right now. "I'll fucking walk!"

"Great." Kylo deadpanned and Rey clenched her fists as she growled loudly in irritation.

"I believe we have trouble in paradise," Hux smirked and Phasma reached over and smacked him upside the head, Hux wincing and crying out as she did so. "What is it with you today?!"

"He's _depressed_!" Phasma hissed and Hux's face twisted in confusion. 

"Why would he--"

"Because she keeps refusing him over and over! On the inside, he's got his tail tucked between his legs and his ears are all the way back and down! Pretty soon he's going to completely give up and stop caring about everything! Don't you know how imprinting works?!" Phasma hissed again and Hux rolled his eyes in annoyance.

"What did he expect? He acted his usual psychotic self the first time they met! If anything, he deserves this--"

"I will gouge out your own eyes and make you eat them!" Phasma snarled and Hux decided it best to stay silent at that. 

Rey kept glancing back over her shoulder at Kylo but he was barely even looking at her, the brunette clenching her jaw as she looked back forward. _Who the fuck does he think he is? He honestly thinks he can just kidnap me and then not even look at me?_

"I think I'm going to run off," Rey huffed and Kylo looked up at her. "I mean, I very easily could right now." He stayed silent at this and she nearly screamed because of his silence. This was getting beyond irritating and she didn't understand why she was getting so angry by this. She should be glad that he was disinterested in her now, right? This was a blessing, not a curse? Isn't this what she had wanted all along?

"I hate you--"

"What the fuck is new, Rey?!" Kylo exploded and both Phasma and Hux fell silent, the two of them having gone back to bickering only a moment ago. 

"Nothing is new--"

"Exactly! Fuckin' exactly! What do you want me to do?!"

"Nothing!"

"Fuckin' alright then!" Kylo snarled and Rey shouted in anger before walking even faster. "You know what, no, why don't we have this chat?!" He caught up to her quickly on Starkiller and Rey hissed over at him.

"What chat is there even to be held?! I hate you, that's final, and it's never going to change!" She wanted to reach up and yank him off of his stupid horse with the stupid name and punch him in his stupid face. "There is nothing to be talked about!"

"And what if I said I don't care a continental that you hate me?! Huh?! I said I'll keep chasin' you, but honestly, what even is the fuckin' point anymore?! You've very clearly given me the mitten, so run! Go!" Kylo barked and Rey paused with wide eyes. 

"...Fine," Rey inhaled sharply and Kylo growled loudly as his eyes glowed. "I'll just stay to piss you off, then!"

"Oh, how mature of you, that's _rich_! One minute you want to run, I give you permission, and now you're only stayin' because you wanna spite me! Real nice of you, Rey, aren't you just the nicest woman on the planet!" Kylo bit out and Rey glared up at him. "I am givin' you an opportunity to shin out, to skedaddle over these damned canyons, and you're stayin' because you are beyond promiscuous!"

"I'm staying because I like pissing you off!" Rey practically shouted and Kylo let out an enraged sound as he slammed down Starkiller's reins, the horse shooting forward and galloping off.

"FUCK YOU!" Rey screamed at the top of her lungs and Phasma slowly rode up to her.

"You, uh...you want a ride?"

"FUCK OFF!" Rey stormed forward and Phasma sighed loudly, Hux finally laughing as he could no longer contain it.

"I give them a day before they fuck like rabbits!" Hux howled and Phasma looked over at him with a beyond shocked expression. "Don't tell me that two people who interact like _that_ won't fuck it out!"

"You're horrid," Phasma stated before riding ahead of him and Hux threw his arms up.

"I'm _right_! Phasma--Phasma, I'm right!"


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly have to work on making chapters longer, I am so sorry about that--  
> Also, puppy Kylo warms my heart and I would die for him. Did you know that wolves are actually incredibly affectionate animals? They feel love on an even larger scale than domesticated dogs do. I'm learning so much from writing this fic--  
> Also wolf packs sleep in cuddle puddles and I just 😭💕

Rey was sitting by the campfire in the canyons where they had stopped to sleep around three in the morning, Phasma and Hux sitting far off from her and chatting.

And where was Kylo? Kylo was in his tent still pissy about earlier.

"Fucking jerk," Rey murmured before taking another swig of the whiskey bottle in her hand, her vision a little swimmy for she had already downed half of it. "Mad at me for the truth."

Thirty minutes later and she felt dizzy, the brunette standing up and stumbling over to behind some rocks and sitting down as she hugged her knees tightly to her chest. She felt...hurt, and she didn't understand why. This man was a psycho, completely off his rocker, and yet when he had told her to run, she had felt like he had personally twisted a hunting knife into her heart.

"I-I can leave anytime I want," She hiccuped. "No one will stop me, I can just...go. Go, go, go...go where? Niima Outpost is so far away..." She inhaled deeply as she closed her eyes and rested her head back against the rocks. "Hate him..."

"You feeling a little tipsy, sunshine? Feeling a little run down?" Hux peered around the corner of the rock with a grin and Rey opened her eyes to glare at him. "Aw, did he hurt your feelings? I thought you _wanted_ to run off like the little rabbit that you are."

"If I'm a rabbit, you're a fucking donkey," Rey pointed a finger at him and he only smirked in response. "F-fucking--fucking braying all day. Mhm."

"Phasma, she's beyond intoxicated, you owe me five dollars for even thinking she could hold that much liquor--"

"Fuck off!" Phasma called out and Rey dropped the empty bottle, tugging at her hair and letting out an irritated growl.

"Hey, Hux, guess what?" Rey hissed and Hux continued to smirk.

"Wha--FUCK!" Rey punched him square in the jaw and he fell backwards, Phasma pausing before howling with laughter. 

"Oh, look at that," Rey looked over at him on the ground. "Now you're the one feeling run down."

"F-fucking...how are you still this precise with a punch when drunk?!" Hux spat angrily and Rey chuckled quietly before looking back forward.

"I'm gonna go...find a stream or something," Rey stood up and walked forward, dragging her hand along the canyon for support as she did. She walked for a good fifteen minutes before falling down to her knees, pausing before bursting into loud laughter and throwing her head back. 

But that laughter quickly turned to tears and she crouched over as she sobbed uncontrollably into her hands, her body trembling as she let everything out that she'd been needing to let out since this all began. Leaving behind her home, the church, her friends, Beebee... _Kaydel_. Everything she ever had was just gone, she was nothing now. 

She was no longer 'Kira Rey Kenobi', she was 'Rey Nobody', and there wasn't the damndest thing she could do about it. What could she do, run off? She could, but where would she even go? She had no idea where the nearest town was, and she knew that if she ran she'd most likely be dead within a few days.

But at this point, maybe death was the better answer. Kylo didn't want her there, that was obvious from how he was completely distancing himself from her, and she _hated_ Hux. Phasma was tolerable, quite the humorous companion, but who cared? The person who had taken her wasn't even talking to her, so there was no point in staying.

She forced herself to stop crying and wiped her eyes hurriedly, picking up a rock beside her and throwing it as hard as she could before she heard someone walking up to her.

"Drink," She heard Kylo growl and she looked up at him, the man holding out his canteen to her with a furious expression as he crouched down beside her. " _Now_."

"O-oh, well, hello to you, too!" Rey snapped before hiccuping loudly, his eyes narrowing as he growled again. "I will _not_ be taking your 'Adam's Ale', thank you very much, for I am already hydrated on whiskey!"

"Why are you making this so difficult?!" Kylo snapped back and Rey snatched the canteen from him, taking a swig from it without breaking eye contact with him. They were both glaring at each other, an aura of rage surrounding them both, and Rey shoved the canteen back at him.

"Happy, jerk?"

"I'm fuckin' _peachy_." He grabbed it back and stood up, Rey sneering up at him before whipping her head back forward.

"Well, isn't that just swell, then? I'm peachy, you're peachy, we're all just _fucking_ peachy!" Rey barked and Kylo growled yet again. "We could make a goddamned peach pie out of all of our--our peachiness!"

"You are as full as a tick right now, you know that? Absolutely fuckin' roostered."

"I _hate_ your stupid cowboy talk! God, fucking--fucking _what_?! I'm a rooster now?! Hux says I'm a rabbit, and now I'm a roo--tick?! I'm a tick, too?! How many animals am I?!" Rey cried out in anguish and Kylo only stared down at her.

"...Are you coherent at all?"

"Yes, I can hear!" Rey snapped viciously and Kylo bit back a smirk as he looked away. He couldn't stay mad at her for this long even if he tried. "What, can you not?!"

"That is not what I asked," Kylo chuckled and Rey bristled. "But no, I can hear."

"Great!" Rey slammed her hands down on the ground and Kylo sat down right next to her. "Absolutely brilliant!" She crossed her arms across her chest as she scowled down at the ground, grumbling incoherent things to herself angrily.

"So, you punched Hux again, hmm?"

"Why do you care? You want me to leave!" Rey glared over at him and his shoulders slouched as he looked down. "Don't you? That's what you told me to do earlier, isn't it? 'Skedaddle over these damned canyons'?"

"I...I was angry, I shouldn't have said those things, but...is that not what you want, Rey...?" He looked positively mopey, his eyes downcast with his hands on his thighs.

"I don't know what I want anymore!" Rey nearly shouted and Kylo looked back up at her with an apologetic expression. "You're confusing me with your--your stupid attractiveness and you smell good and you're warm, but you're bad! Bad, dog, bad!" She snatched his hat off of his head and put it on, crossing her arms again as she glared forward.

"You think I smell good?" Kylo instantly lit up, his imaginary tail smacking against the ground excitedly. "And I'm warm? And you think I'm attractive?"

"It doesn't matter!" Rey hissed loudly and Kylo couldn't stop himself from smiling. _She likes me? She likes me! Luna likes me! She doesn't hate me, she likes me!_ His inner wolf was practically jumping and prancing around in pure joy, yipping and barking in delight as he thrived in the idea of her finally admitting that she liked him.

"Luna," He purred out and Rey narrowed her eyes. "Luna, you're so cute--"

"Piss off," Rey snarled but he only continued to smile. "I hate you, and don't ever call me cute."

"No, you adore me, you just said so--"

"When on God's green earth did I say _that_?!" Rey whipped her head towards him and with the way he was acting he reminded her of an excited puppy. She could practically hear his tail thumping against the ground, the man giving her the biggest grin she had ever seen.

"Luna, I'm so happy--"

"Don't be, and my name is Rey--"

"You like me!" Kylo practically yipped and Rey pressed her lips together tightly. "It's okay, you can admit it! Say it with me, 'I like you'!"

"I do _not_ \--"

"Do you wanna go cuddle?" He was talking faster than a woodpecker can peck wood. "Let's go cuddle! Are you hungry? Do you want food? Do you want more water? Let's go cuddle--"

"Stop," Rey hissed loudly as she slammed her hand over his mouth, Kylo still looking at her with bright, shining eyes. She found it eerie that they gave off that reflective golden sheen, but it was a hell of a lot better than his wolf form, at least. "I will not cuddle with you, I am not hungry, and I am not thirsty. I am drunk, you are too much, and I did not sign up to take care of an overgrown puppy."

"...Cuddle?" Kylo's voice was muffled by her hand and she deadpanned as she accepted the fact that his instincts were much too delighted by her stupidly admitting her true thoughts. She blamed the liquor.

" _No_ ," She narrowed her eyes. "No cuddling."

He whined quietly with a pleading look and Rey clenched her jaw yet again as she ripped her hand away from him. 

"You've completely killed my buzz and now all I have is this splitting headache--"

"Water!" He handed her the canteen and Rey closed her eyes while inhaling sharply. This entire interaction had sobered her up immensely and now she was just irritated. _He's a puppy, this confirms it. This man is an overgrown puppy who's obsessed with me._ She reopened her eyes and took the canteen, taking a swig before licking the water off her lips and looking back at him.

"...Stop looking at me like that,"

"But I love you--"

"No, you don't! Jesus Christ, you don't! This isn't some fairytale, Kylo! I am _not_ your 'Luna'! I will never be your stupid 'Luna'!" Rey spat venomously and his smile quickly vanished, his eyes saddening as his entire demeanor deflated.

"...Oh," He whispered and Rey quickly looked away. "Okay," Kylo swallowed thickly as he looked down and Rey closed her eyes as she tried to fight off the sympathetic feelings within her. "Okay." He stood up and walked off and Rey stayed right where she was, clutching the canteen tightly in her hands as she squeezed her eyes shut tighter.

"Kylo," She groaned loudly fifteen minutes later as she stood up, knowing he was gone and that she was only talking to the wind. "Kylo, I'm--"

"Oh, my," Rey froze as she heard a deep voice several feet away from behind her, Rey whirling around as she saw a man approaching her. "What are you doin' out here, honey?"

 _Dammit. Goddammit, that's a bandit. Ah, Christ. I'm too drunk for this, and I don't have anything to defend myself with._ "Can't a girl just be in the canyons at night on her own?" Rey took a cautious, stumbling step backwards as she dropped the canteen to the ground and the man smirked. 

"Not one as pretty as you--"

"I'm not even going to let you finish that because I really don't feel like being sexualized right now." Rey rolled her eyes and the man grinned, Rey clicking her tongue before bending down and picking up a large rock. 

"You know what? How about you leave right now, because I don't have the energy to do this. You cannot fathom the amount of shit I've been wallowing in these past few days, and--" Rey was cut off by a bullet whirring past her and striking the man directly in the forehead, his body crumpling down and Rey just stared down at him before her face twisted in rage. "I had that--"

"No, you didn't," Kylo came running up to her and grabbed her with one arm, pulling her against him protectively as he shot upwards at more men at the top of the canyons. "Don't be difficult right now--"

"I'm being difficult?!" She grabbed the other gun from his other holster and shot the other man running at them, Kylo scoffing loudly before smirking. _God, I love her._

"A little, yeah,"

"Oh, I'm sorry," Rey drawled sarcastically as she whirled around and shot yet another man, both of them standing back to back now. "Perhaps I should be all silk and honey instead then, shouldn't I?"

"That would be nice," Kylo hummed and Rey rolled her eyes in annoyance. "You have a wonderful shot for a drunk woman, you know that?"

"You learn how to shoot dead on perfectly when drunk in Niima Outpost," She shot another man and they both paused before concluding that they had gotten all of them. "Lots of outlaws, lots of gunfights."

"And you're okay?" They didn't move, staying back to back. "What were you goin' to do with that rock, bash his head in?"

"That was the plan, yes--"

"He would've shot you before you even could, they were plannin' on ambushin' you," They both turned around at the same time. "And then where would I be?"

"...Hmm," Rey hummed out before handing him back his black pistol. "This is a good gun, I just thought I'd say that."

"I'm proud of you," He spoke softly as he took the gun back and Rey's cheeks burned hotly at the praise. "You didn't show a lick of fear, most humans would be terrified in that situation."

"Once again, I'm from Niima Outpost, and you kind of have to learn to not be afraid." Rey huffed before whirling around on her heel and walking forward, stepping over a couple bodies as she did so. "How the hell did I not notice them?"

"I smelled them, that's why I came runnin' back." He put his guns back in his holsters and Rey suddenly remembered that she was still wearing his hat. She took it off and thrusted it at him. 

"Here--"

"I like it on you better," Kylo smiled and Rey hesitated before looking down at it and then back up at him and then back down at the hat. "And I know you're lyin' about likin' me by the way you're starin' down at that hat."

"Why would I like a man who laughs when getting punched in the face?" Rey muttered and Kylo walked over to her, tilting her chin up to meet his gaze. She was really starting to hate that she loved the feeling of his leather gloves on her skin. 

"I don't know, darlin', you tell me," He grinned and Rey scowled up at him. "But I would appreciate it if you would stop tryin' to purposely hurt me. It's not fun to have your heart stomped on repeatedly, understand?"

"Whatever," Rey muttered and Kylo smirked in victory. "But stop...being psychotic." She put the hat back on and turned back around, Kylo looking around at the dead bodies before humming softly. _We could eat for days with this amount of corpses, couldn't we? I'll have to bring Hux and Phasma out here later when she's asleep._

They quickly made their way back to the campsite and both Hux and Phasma were asleep, Hux's head in Phasma's lap.

"Are they...together?" Rey whispered and Kylo snorted loudly as he shook his head.

"No, it's a pack thing. Packs normally sleep together, it's a source of comfort and warmth." Kylo chuckled before heading towards the tent he set up before pausing and turning around. "I am sorry for the things I said earlier, Rey."

"Why?" Rey asked and Kylo looked taken aback for a moment. "Why should you apologize for speaking on how you really feel--"

"Because that's _not_ how I really feel! You really think I want you to pack on up and get? You really think I want you to leave forever and never see your face again? Rey," He rushed over and Rey instantly froze, Kylo cradling her face in his hands as he stared down at her. "I would rather die than never get to see you again."

"I could...arrange that..." Rey swallowed and he looked away with a hurt expression as he let go of her face and took a step back.

"And here I thought we just established that you'd stop sayin' hurtful things on purpose." He turned around and walked back to his tent, slipping inside and disappearing.

Rey sat down on the ground before laying back and looking up at the stars, her head pounding violently from the hangover she knew she'd have when she woke up. Sudden anger took over her as his hurt expression played over and over again in her head, the brunette gritting her teeth as she let out an enraged hiss.

 _He has no right to be upset or hurt! He got me into this mess, maybe if he had acted like a normal fucking person and wasn't this wolfman cannibal psycho then it wouldn't be like this!_ "Goddamn--Kylo!" Rey bolted up and stormed over to his tent, throwing up the flap and Kylo's head whipped towards her with wide eyes.

"Fuck you!" Rey spat and his expression hardened. "You have no _fucking_ right to be upset by me wanting to kill you, to--to run off! These past few days I have lost my best friend to death, my home, my Father's church, my other friends, and the best damned dog the world could ever ask for! I have lost _everything_ because of _you_!" Rey nearly shouted and Kylo inhaled sharply.

"What are you goin' to do about it, Rey?" He growled and Rey cried out before shoving him backwards harshly, fire burning in her eyes as she did so.

"Fight me!" Rey barked and Kylo narrowed his eyes. "Fucking--fucking fight me! Right here, right now! I can take it, in fact, I'm sure I can kick your ass!" Rey tried to throw a punch but he instantly grabbed her wrist. She whined loudly in frustration as her knees buckled slightly, Kylo growling even louder as he leaned down.

"No, I don't think you--"

"I COULD!" Rey screamed and she heard Phasma curse loudly outside as she was jerked awake, Hux groaning softly.

"Is it finally happening...?" Rey heard Hux mutter and her cheeks burned bright red as she jerked herself back from Kylo as he let go of her wrist.

"I--ooh, you," She chuckled bitterly as she put her hands on her hips."You-- _you_ , sir, are a menace!"

"A menace?" Kylo looked her up and down. "You're the most reckless woman I've ever met, and you're calling _me_ a menace?"

"You're a cannibalistic, psychopathic, narcissistic man who doesn't care about anything but him--"

"I CARE ABOUT YOU!" Kylo roared and Rey just screamed right back at him. 

"Ooh, they're trying to out scream each other to establish dominance," Hux murmured and Phasma glared down at him. "My money is on Rey--"

"SHUT UP!" Both Kylo and Rey screamed from inside of the tent and Phasma snickered loudly. Rey suddenly stormed out of the tent and Kylo cursed loudly before the sound of something being thrown clattered to the ground, Hux and Phasma watching her walk several feet away before she sat down on the ground with her back to them as she folded her arms across her chest.

This was going to be a very long trip.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And, finally, smut. *throws confetti*  
> Also, my tumblr is drownedoutstars if y'all wanna check me out on there! I just post updates about fics as well as moodboards and sometimes fanfic memes (don't judge me lmao)

Rey was sitting behind Phasma on her white mare, the brunette tiredly leaning her head against the blonde woman's shoulder. She had refused to ride with Kylo, especially after what happened earlier that early morning, and she was much too tired and hungover to walk.

"You doing okay, Rey?" Phasma asked softly and Rey hummed in response as she closed her eyes. Phasma reached back and gently patted her leg, Rey slowly opening her eyes. "I know you didn't sleep much, I'm sorry. I know Kylo can be--"

"A raging psychopath?" Rey muttered and Phasma paused before chuckling quietly.

"Yeah, sure. That." Phasma looked at Kylo who was far ahead of him, the blonde feeling his irritated aura all the way from back there. "But he does care about you--"

"Horseshit!" Rey hissed as she pulled back and Phasma looked over her shoulder at her.

"I know he hasn't explained what imprinting is, but it's an extremely big deal to our kind. It's...becoming bound to someone the instant you see them, like that person is the only thing holding you down to earth from there on out. Everything and everyone else becomes secondary, the one you imprinted on becoming the only one who matters anymore. It's...magnetic, and all he's thinking about is you." Phasma sighed loudly as she looked back forward and Rey's expression softened.

"Did he have a choice in the matter...?"

"No," Phasma shook her head. "No, you don't get to choose who you imprint upon. It just happens out of the blue once that special person comes along, and I think now you can understand why he's been acting the way he has. Yes, he's psychotic, but he'd never hurt you. He loves--"

"Please don't finish that sentence." Rey grumbled as she looked down and Phasma nodded silently. 

"I know this situation is beyond fucked, Rey, I really, really do. I know we're cannibalistic werewolf outlaws, and that our views on the world are more than immoral, but please understand that we can't hurt you."

"Can't?"

"Mmn," Phasma nodded once sternly. "If we even tried, we'd either be kicked out of the pack or killed by Kylo himself. Probably the latter, knowing Kylo. It's why Hux doesn't hit you back." Phasma couldn't help but chuckle and Rey leaned over to the right slightly to catch a glimpse of him way up on the horizon.

"As much as I would like to," Hux mumbled from beside them and Rey whipped her head towards him to glare daggers at the prissy redhead. "Equal rights, equal fights." 

"You are possibly the worst man alive, do you know that?" Rey snapped and Hux growled as he glared forward. "Just this absolute brute of a dog--"

"I can still snap my teeth at you!" Hux growled as he looked over at her and Rey tried to reach over and hit him, Phasma quickly holding her back as the two shouted at each other.

"MURDERER!"

"WHORE!"

"OH, I'M A WHORE?!"

"YOU SELL YOUR BODY, DON'T YOU?!"

"IT IS MY GOD GIVEN RIGHT AS A WOMAN--"

"TO WHAT?! FUCK EVERYONE?!"

"FUCK YOU, YOU--"

"ENOUGH!" Phasma screamed and both of them fell silent, her horse neighing loudly as it shook its head. The horses must be used to screaming because they really didn't seem to be spooked. "Enough! Enough, enough, enough! Goddamn, Jesus Christ!" Phasma spat and Rey folded her arms across her chest as she turned her head away from Hux.

"Can you two quit it for just one day? Just one day, that's all I'm asking! Hux, you're a cunt. Rey, you're reckless. There, there's two bad things about each other so you two can _shut your mouths_." Phasma hissed loudly and Rey found herself leaning to the right again to look at Kylo once more.

She was still wearing his hat, drowning out the sounds of Hux and Phasma bickering as she took it off and stared down at it. She gently ran her fingertips across the front of it, her expression becoming distant as all thoughts faded away except for him.

 _He took you from your home, let Hux kill Kaydel, trespassed on your Father's sacred ground, and you're thinking of him in a positive light right now?_ A little voice in the back of her mind hissed and she slowly frowned. _He's the reason for everything bad, why are you feeling sorry for him? Why are you only thinking of him? What's wrong with you?_

 _He's the only one that's ever looked at me,_ a softer voice whispered. _The only one who's ever spoken to me with a softness besides Father Kenobi._

"Goddammit," Rey looked up as she heard Phasma curse quietly. "It's a ghost town. It looks like we're spending the night with the phantoms."

Rey looked ahead to see the small town on the horizon and she instantly hopped off the horse, running wildly ahead with wide eyes as she ignored the pounding in her head. She felt Kylo's eyes on her as she ran past him and she couldn't help but look over at him as she did so, his golden eyes full of what looked like to be remorse.

She looked back forward and continued to run, running into the ghost town and frantically searching for anyone. She wanted to see other humans, to have one single normal interaction, but there was no one. There was no one but the shadows of the past, the dust of what once was, and she let out an enraged scream as she stormed into the abandoned saloon.

She quickly hopped the bar counter and started raiding what was left of the liquor, throwing each dusty, empty bottle behind her and finding instant satisfaction when they shattered. "Come on, come on, _come on_ , I just want one--"

"You're turnin' to alcohol for your problems now?" Kylo walked in and Rey spun around to look at him. "That ain't exactly a healthy--"

"It's better than throwing myself off of a cliff, isn't it?" She snapped as she turned back around and he clenched his jaw angrily. "I may have the worst hangover of my life right now, but hey, at least I didn't go out and eat bits and pieces of the bandits we killed last night!"

"I did it away from you--"

"But you _still_ did it--"

"Because it's in my code! My goddamn DNA!" Kylo snarled and she shouted loudly in frustration as she grabbed another empty bottle, whirling it around and throwing it at him only for him to dodge it. His expression quickly became enraged and Rey glared at him as her chest heaved up and down.

"You want to die, Rey, is that it?! You want to go run off and be picked off by the buzzards?!" He was approaching the bar fast and Rey hopped back over the bar counter to confront him. "You hate me? Fine! Fuckin' fine, I get it, but I'm _not_ ever lettin' you die under my watch!"

"Why do you care about me so much?!"

"BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!" Kylo screamed and Rey suddenly pulled him down by his collar, smashing her lips against his and he paused for a moment before kissing her back and picking her up. She wrapped his legs around his waist and he threw off her (his) hat, slamming her down on the bar counter on her back and grinding their hips together roughly in a feverish manner as she kicked off her boots.

Rey pulled back and threw her head back as Kylo hurriedly tore off her blouse, leaving heated open mouthed kisses down her neck to her bare chest. His gloved hands were frantically grabbing at her, almost as if he was afraid that she'd vanish at any given moment unless he held onto her. And _goddamn_ , did she love the feeling of his leather gloves on her bare skin.

He tore off her pants and Rey silently mourned them, having liked the tight black pants she had hemmed herself to fit her waist and legs, but the mourning instantly stopped as she heard him unbuckling his belt. She heard him also unzipping his zipper and he was suddenly kissing her again, Rey screaming into his mouth as he pushed in only for him to still and pull his head back.

"Shit," He breathed shakily as he buried his face in her neck. "Shit, shit, shit, I'm sorry, I got excited that you're finally--"

"J-just-- _fuck_ \--" Rey choked out, realizing that he was only half way in and it felt like she was being split open like a melon on a hot summer day. "F-fucking--fucking do it, we're already here!"

"But I don't want to hurt you--"

"I said," She growled loudly and Kylo swallowed thickly with wide eyes as his cock twitched at her dark tone. " _Do it_."

He slammed into her without warning and she screamed again as she clawed at his back frantically, tears stinging her eyes as he went at a mercilessly fast pace.

"Fuck," He groaned loudly before kissing her again, Rey tangling her hands in his hair as she squeezed her eyes shut and met his movements with her hips. "Fuck, Rey-- _fuck_ , you're _tight_ \--"

The pain was quickly turning to pleasure as she threw her head back yet again, loud, high pitched noises streaming from her lips like a river that just won't quit. The term 'babbling brook' would be an excellent use here, in all things set aside.

She didn't think she'd ever taken a cock this big in her life, this feeling of complete, overwhelming fullness foreign to her, and she didn't think her cervix would ever recover from this endeavour. It was animalistic, the way he was fucking her, and she had no control over the noises pouring out of her mouth as he fucked her into next week.

"So wet," He growled out in a voice that sounded too deep to be human as he nipped her throat roughly, earning a loud cry from her as she felt immense heat build up in the pit of her stomach. "So fuckin' wet and _mine_."

He wasn't wrong about her being positively soaked, the wet sounds coming from him ramming into her more than obscene. Her body suddenly convulsed as her orgasm ripped through her, Rey screaming at the top of her lungs as she arched her back which only pushed him further into her. Kylo cursed loudly as her cunt clenched tightly around him, speeding up his thrusts (which Rey didn't even think was possible, but then again, this man wasn't human) as he pulled up and gripped her hips bruisingly tight.

She didn't even hate the idea of him leaving bruises on her, in fact, it only made her more aroused.

Only three words were racing through his head, all other thoughts gone as he stared down at this masterpiece of a woman: _Bite, breed, pups_. Of course, she wouldn't be able to carry his pups until he gave her the bite on the full moon, as humans can't carry something within them that isn't their species, but his instincts weren't exactly dwelling on that in the moment. No, no, he was inside of her, and she was screaming his name to the high Heavens like he was her new God.

"Look at you, my Luna," He growled as he felt himself growing close, his eyes glowing brightly as his upper and lower canines extended. _Bite, breed, pups._ "Don't you make just t-the--ah, _fuck_ \--prettiest paintin' on the planet?" _Bite, breed, pups. Bite, breed, pups. Bite, breed, pups._ "You were born to be mine, born to take my cock, and born to have my pups. Say it."

"I-I was born for it!" Rey sobbed as she felt another orgasm coming, her body trembling as tears of overwhelming pleasure flowed down her cheeks. "I-I was born for it, I was born for it!"

"Shit!" Kylo cursed loudly as he exploded within her at her words, slamming their hips together tightly as he let out a loud, shaky, and broken moan. She came a second time almost instantaneously the same time he did, Kylo shuddering as he felt more cum spew into her.

Rey whimpered loudly and Kylo instantly leaned down, smoothing her hair back and kissing away her tears with their hips still pressed together tightly. _Need to stay in for pups. Can't pull out, need to stay in for pups._

She wrapped her arms around his neck and whimpered again as her body went limp, Kylo gently hushing her as he nuzzled her jaw affectionately. He hadn't bitten her, as much as he wanted to, and his instincts were screaming at him to do so now. But that scream quickly faded as primal instincts were replaced with nurturing ones, and he kissed her lips softly as he caressed her cheek with the utmost care.

"Oh, Luna, I'm so proud of you," He cooed out and Rey blinked away tears as she looked up at him. She was a flushed mess, her lips red and swollen and her cheeks brighter than cherries as her chest heaved. Her breathing was labored, and he could tell that she was most certainly going to have trouble walking just from how hard he had fucked her. "You did so well, you know that? Do you know how proud I am of you?"

"K-Kylo..." Rey whined brokenly and he hushed her again, pressing their foreheads together as he basked in the afterglow of sex. "K-Kylo, I'm sorry..."

"Ain't nothin' you need to be apologizin' for, darlin', you did so well," Kylo breathed out before resting his head in the crook of her neck, both of them catching their breath as they closed their eyes. His upper and lower canines unextended as he relaxed, a soft sigh escaping his lips. "You were so, so good for me. Perfect. My perfect, perfect Luna."

"M-mmn...?" Rey feel like she could barely talk, her voice scratchy and throat raw from screaming so loudly. She didn't exactly know why she initiated this in the first place, but she didn't exactly regret it. In fact, nothing in the world had ever felt more right to her than him being inside of her. "M-move--"

"No," His response was lightning fast and it suddenly hit Rey as her eyes flew open. He had came inside of her. He had came _inside_ of her. "No, I can't do that, not yet, my instincts--"

"M-move! M-move, move, pull out! Pull out, I don't want to get--"

"You can't," He suddenly sounded sorrowful, practically heartbroken. "Humans can't get pregnant from werewolves, we're not the same species. Our genetics are more than different..."

"I-I--mmn..." She hit her head back against the bar counter, her body once again relaxing as she absentmindedly ran her fingers through his silky hair. At least pregnancy was one last thing she needed to worry about, she already had so many other things that needed more worrying.

Kylo slowly pulled out with a low groan as he looked down at the viscous white fluid run out of her, a whine getting stuck in the back of his throat as he watched it drip down to the floor. _Pups..._

When he pulled out, Rey had never felt so physically empty in her entire life. She had been fucked to Hell and back and she was more than certain that her insides had been rearranged. When she shuddered, more cum came out of her and Kylo was unable to hold back the whine that time.

"I-I have never...been fucked like that..." Rey gasped breathlessly and Kylo leaned down once more to kiss her again as he held her face in his hands. "I gotta...wash off..."

"There might be a stream around here, yeah," He sighed and Rey hummed quietly. "And hopefully there are clothes somewhere 'round here for you, too. I kinda...tore them to shreds,"

"You animal," Rey chuckled tiredly and Kylo instantly smiled. "You absolute beast of a man." That calming feeling was back, the one she had felt both at the church and the train car, and it suddenly made sense.

It was the bond. It was the imprinting bond, and it had been trying to make this happen since the very first time they saw each other. It had been trying to push them together, to make her see that this was how it was always going to be in the end, and she felt damn near breathless for a moment as she stared up at him.

 _"Being imprinted can be a beautiful thing, it can be incredible."_ His words from the train car rang in her head and she reached up, gently touching his cheek and he instantly leaned into her touch as he closed his eyes.

"I think I prefer you like this," Rey whispered and he scoffed with a smile as he reopened his eyes. "I prefer the softness over the psychotic maniac that cornered me in the church."

"I couldn't help it," He grabbed her hand and kissed her palm sweetly with their eyes still locked. "I tend to come off as a little... _manic_ when I really want somethin'."

" _Manic_? Kylo, you were--"

"Ben," He spoke softly and Rey's face fell at the name. "My real name is Ben Solo."

"...The Reverend who raised me was named was Ben," Rey choked out and he instantly tensed up.

"Oh, uh--huh, that's...that's a little awkward, ain't it?" He chuckled nervously and Rey glanced over to the side as an awkward silence enveloped them before he broke it. "That is...not how I thought that was gonna go when I told you--"

"I'm just...going to keep calling you 'Kylo'," Rey cleared her throat as she sat up and Kylo nodded hurriedly as he tucked his cock pack into his pants and zipped them up, quickly buckling his belt as well. "But isn't that just the strangest coincidence?"

"Yep," He popped the 'p' on the end as Rey tried to jump down, the brunette yelping as she nearly fell to her knees as he quickly caught her in his arms. "Shit, you okay?"

"Yes, I'm--Kylo!" Rey squeaked as he picked her up bridal style and she clung tightly to him. "I can walk, I'm fine! Put me down right now or so help me God I will gut you like a--"

"And yet you're still threatenin' me," He smirked while cutting her off as he headed towards the stairs and she scowled up at him. "It just wouldn't be the same if you didn't, but now at least I know you actually admit you're mine."

"Shut up," She muttered and he grinned down at her as he walked up the stairs. "Just shut your beautiful mouth."

"Mmn, I don't think I will," He looked back forward. "You haven't even seen what my mouth can do yet."

Rey choked loudly at this and he couldn't help but laugh as her cheeks turned bright red once more.

\-----------------------------------------

"And where are they?" Phasma asked as she met back up with Hux after they searched the town, the both of them in the living room area of a small inn.

"The river," Hux chuckled as he took a swig of the whiskey bottle in his hand. "You also owe me money because I told you they'd fuck in day or so."

"I don't owe you anything, Hux," Phasma sneered and Hux simply only smirked back. "She just finally gave into the bond, it was bound to happen at any moment."

"Yes, well, I really wouldn't suggest going into the saloon...it stinks of sex and they left a mess on the floor."

"Of course you went in there to investigate, you're a raging pervert--"

"Hey, no," He pointed a finger at her and she only scowled back. "I wanted whiskey, I did _not_ want to see their aftermath of sex!"

"Yeah, well...I don't know if you smelled it, but the stench of wolf is here, too. And you know who it smells like?"

"No...no, no, no, he killed him, he ripped him to pieces--"

"Smell this and tell me it doesn't smell exactly like him." Phasma pulled out a torn piece of fabric from her pocket and Hux rushed over to her, grabbing it and bringing it up to his nose to inhale deeply.

" _Fuck_ \--"

"It's Snoke."


	11. Chapter 11

"You're so soft," Kylo muttered as he ran her hands down her sides from behind in the river, Rey humming quietly as she closed her eyes and leaned against him. "You're softer than a silk duvet and you are finer than cream gravy."

"A silk duvet, I can understand, but 'cream gravy'? God, you and your idiotic Western slang," Rey smiled as as she opened her eyes, tilting her head to the side as he nuzzled her neck. Her hair was wet from washing her hair with the lye soap they took from the saloon washroom, soap suds still clinging to her skin as he ran his hands over her skin. "Plus, I wouldn't know what a silk duvet feels like."

"You've never slept in a silk bed? Oh, darlin', we'll have to change that." Kylo chuckled as he kissed her shoulder. Rey bit her lower lip with a smile as she wiggled her hips, Kylo suddenly gripping her hips and stilling them. "Keep that up and we'll be in this river for a _lot_ longer."

"You're going to destroy me if you fuck me again," Rey groaned and Kylo twirled her around, pulling her flush against him with his arm wrapped securely around her waist. "I'm pretty sure you bruised my cervix, and it still hurts to walk--"

"Then I'll just carry you everywhere, yeah?" He smiled and she snorted softly before resting her head against his chest and wrapped her arms around him.

The water was cool and refreshing around them, coming up to her upper waist. It's currents were gentle, the sound of it running a soothing lullaby, and she had never felt more calm. Being here, with him, was the breath of fresh air she had been denying herself of for five years. Hell had turned into Heaven, and the Devil had become God.

"How bad does it hurt?" He asked softly and Rey sighed as she shrugged. "Nuh-uh, Rey, come on, now. Tell me." He tilted her chin up and she bit her lower lip.

"Kind of like...I was fucked with a nine inch metal pole...?" She smiled nervously and he pressed his lips together tightly before looking away and clicking his tongue. "It's my fault, Kylo, I told you to--"

"I shouldn't have been so rough in the first place, I apologize sincerely--"

"Hey, no, it's my fault!" Rey smacked his bare chest as she pouted and Kylo looked back down at her. "I initiated it, I told you to do it anyways, so stop blaming yourself!"

"...I still blame myself--"

"Goddammit, _no_!" She smacked his chest again with an annoyed expression and he couldn't help but chuckle. "What did I just say?! You stubborn, stubborn man!" She hissed and he chuckled louder in response.

"Can you blame me for blamin' myself for this? I hurt you--"

"I think you'll find that I can't get hurt easily." She scowled once more and suddenly Kylo's head whipped up, a low growl emitting from his throat as he pulled her tightly against him. She quickly looked over her shoulder to see Phasma standing there with her hands up and her back to them.

"I'm not looking," Phasma stated and Kylo only growled louder as darkness clouded his golden gaze. "I'm not looking, I'm not looking at her. I walked backwards once I got close, I haven't seen anything. I'm not challenging you nor am I threatening her, Kylo."

Kylo slowly relaxed and Rey realized that his instincts were more than high on alert. "...Why are you here?" He spoke lowly and Phasma sighed loudly as she hung her head.

"We should go East, Kylo. Hell, we should get out of the states, actually. I have some...pretty bad news--"

"Bad enough to interrupt my time with my Luna?" Kylo hissed and Rey gently nudged his shoulder, the man instantly looking down at her with a loving expression.

"Just listen to her," Rey whispered and Kylo looked away with an aggravated expression. "Please? For me?"

"...You have fifteen seconds to tell me what you need to tell me, Cottonmouth." He looked back up at Phasma and the blonde nodded quickly with her hands still up in the air. Rey assumed she had her hands up in the air so Kylo could see that she was, indeed, not a threat.

"I was poking around the town while you two were...consummating the bond," Phasma cleared her throat and Rey blushed darkly as she buried her face in Kylo's chest. "And I found something pretty fucking horrifying, I'm not going to lie to you. It seems one phantom from your past up and went raised from his grave."

"What?" Kylo scoffed loudly and Phasma sighed again.

"You're going to hate this, especially now that you've found her--"

"Spit. It. Out. _Now_." Kylo spat each individual word out and Rey looked over her shoulder at Phasma once more.

"...Okay, Snoke is back," Phasma spoke quickly and Kylo's face slowly fell as fear entered his eyes. "And I believe he's looking for you. I'm more than certain it was werewolves he turned that we smelled back at Niima Outpost, and I believe he stopped here two nights ago while traveling down there to confront you. The scent is still fresh, about two days fresh, but...it smells heavily dead, I think a necromancer or something brought him back--"

"I ripped him to pieces," Kylo whispered and Rey looked up at him in confusion. "I tore his throat out, mauled him beyond recognition, how the hell did he--"

"Like I said, I'm guessing a necromancer." Phasma muttered and Kylo paused for a moment before looking down at Rey with terrified eyes.

"...We're leavin'," Kylo announced suddenly as he hurriedly began to wash Rey off, the brunette blinking in shock as she opened her mouth to ask who the hell Snoke even was, but he spoke before she even could. "We're lightin' a shuck right fuckin' now, we're going East. We'll go to Britain, go tell Hux."

"Yes, sir!" Phasma gave him a salute, even though he couldn't see it, before running off.

"Kylo--"

"We're okay, we're gonna go to Britain! That's fun, right?"

"Kylo--"

"You're gonna love it there, you can sleep in a silk bed! That's rather excitin', ain't it? Silk bed?"

" _Kylo_ \--"

"They're a little prissy over there, with them being of the first water and all, but you'll fit right--"

" _Kylo_!" Rey hissed loudly and he instantly shut his mouth. "What the hell is going on?! Who's Snoke?! Why do we have to leave?!" 

"...Snoke is the man who bit me," He swallowed as he quickly glanced away with an unreadable expression on his face. "...And killed my parents and uncle."

"He--oh..." Rey looked down with wide eyes as she placed her hands on her chest, letting out a loud exhale as she blinked. "I didn't know your family was dead...I'm so sorry..."

"I hadn't exactly told you yet," He gently ran his hands down her sides, simply just enjoying the feeling of her skin beneath his touch. "It's a sensitive subject...a little sore of the heart, if you know what I mean."

"No, I get it," Rey sighed softly as she pulled away, suddenly dunking herself in the water before coming back up and pushing her hair back. "The Reverend who raised me, Ben Kenobi, died when I was thirteen. When I lost him, I felt...very empty for a very long time, so, I know what it feels like to lose your family."

"...You do, don't you?" He inhaled slowly before cradling her face in his hands as he stared down at her. "You've just been losin' people left and right, of course you understand. That's why we fit together so well. We've both lost so, so much, haven't we?"

"I--yeah..." Rey glanced away with a slight frown, having been slightly unnerved by his words just a little. She didn't want to remember Kaydel's corpse, yet there it was popping up in her head again. "You know what? I'm cold, I think I wish to go back now." Rey cleared her throat and Kylo paused before nodding in agreement.

"Can we also just...spend the night here? I'm so tired--"

"No, darlin'," Kylo sighed as he got out of the river and started drying himself off with one of the towels they took from the washroom. "I can't risk him ridin' on back here and even takin' one glance at you. I can't, just--don't fight me on this, don't be stubborn, and do as you're told."

Oh. _Oh, hell no._ "Do as I'm _told_? You're joking, right? Since when the hell do you get to tell me what to--"

"You're _mine_ ," He growled as his eyes flashed angrily and she narrowed her eyes as she hurriedly got out of the water. "I know what's best for you, I always will."

"Oh, really?" Rey snatched the towel from him and roughly dried herself off, glaring at him the entire time she did. "So, I just don't have rights anymore, is that it? I'm just your bitch?"

"That is _not_ what I said, Rey, and don't you dare start puttin' words in my mouth--"

"You're implying it! Just because we fucked doesn't suddenly mean you have complete control over me--"

"He will _kill_ you!" Kylo snapped and Rey suddenly paused. "And then where would I be, huh?! If you're dead, I'm as good as dead, too, and I sure as shit ain't gonna let you die! Not on my fuckin' watch, not ever! I  
So, yes, in this moment, you don't have the right to say anythin' about stayin'. Do I make myself clear?"

"...Crystal," Rey hissed out before picking up the black pioneer dress as well as a pair of white drawers off the ground that she had found in a trunk at the saloon. "Absolutely crystal, Kylo."

"Don't be like that," He sighed as he started getting dressed, Rey pulling on the dress after pulling on the drawers and buttoning up the dark green buttons on the front. "I'm only lookin' out for you, why can't you get that?"

"Because you're making it sound like I'm your property," Rey spat as she reached behind and started zipping up the zipper. "I am no man's property, I am my own--"

"You're not my property, but you are mine." He turned her around and zipped up the rest of her zipper. "You belong to me, Rey, and you accepted that the moment you conssumated the bond with me."

"Uh-huh," Rey muttered as she whirled back around and started walking away from him, Kylo pausing before cursing loudly and trying to dress as fast as possible.

"Rey--Rey, darlin', hang on--"

"I will meet you back at the town where we will then go on the road for God knows how long!" Rey called out angrily and Kylo cursed again as he pulled on his boots. 

"Baby--Luna, darlin', love of my life, don't be like this--"

"I'm not being like _anything_!" Rey snapped and Kylo growled under his breath as he buckled his belt.

"Luna!" He snapped angrily but she only kept walking, crossing her arms across her chest as she silently fumed. "LUNA!"

"WHAT?!" Rey screamed and then there was the sound of him running at her, Rey crying out loudly as he picked her up and threw her over his shoulder. "KYLO, PUT ME DOWN THIS--"

"No!" He snapped once more and Rey pounded her fists on his back as he walked hurriedly, kicking her feet as she cried out in annoyance.

"Damn you! Damn you, damn you, _damn you_ , Kylo Ren! I can walk--"

"And earlier you were tellin' me 'bout how it hurt to walk! What changed so suddenly, huh? The fact that we can't stay in a dingy, dusty ghost town?" Kylo bit out and Rey huffed loudly as she went still and gave up, hanging her arms limply as she grimaced.

"I'm _tired_ , Kylo! I'm tired, and I'm hungry, and I just want to rest for _one_ night! I want to sleep in a bed, not on the ground--"

"My tent was always open to you--"

"That's not the point!" Rey kicked her feet once more before sighing loudly and going limp again. "Just let me sleep in a fucking bed, Kylo. He can't come back that quickly, there's no way, and I just want to sleep in a bed. That's it, that's all I want! I want soft sheets and pillows--"

"We'll take those things from the inn, then, but we're not stayin'. You're not changin' my mind, Rey." Kylo narrowed his eyes and Rey groaned loudly in annoyance before hanging her head.

_Damn you, Kylo Ren._

\-----------------------------------------------------------

"Where is she?" Phasma asked around dawn after they had stopped to camp out, having traveled for a good several miles.

"Asleep," Kylo sighed as he stared up at the dawn painted sky. He had always loved the colors dawn brought. The blinding golden tangerines colliding with vivid periwinkles as well royal purples and astonishing red orange, and on top of it all was the pale pink that caressed the other colors like the gentle touch of a lover's hand. "She's beyond exhausted, she passed out the moment after she ate and drank three canteens worth of water."

"Are you afraid?" Phasma whispered as she leaned close to him from where they were sitting across from each other by his tent. "Are you afraid of what will happen if he finds out about her?"

"Of course I am," Kylo looked back down at her and Phasma nodded silently. "Of course I'm terrified, Gwen. She's my all, my heart, and the first thing he'll do is kill her to hurt me; to get back at me for killin' him."

"Hux and I will make sure he doesn't find us, Kylo. We're your pack, your family, and you and your Luna are our first priority over everything else." Phasma put his hands on his shoulders and Kylo couldn't help but smile. "Hux may not act like it, but I believe he's finally starting to warm up to--"

"I am not," Hux called from his sleeping bag from several feet away. "I am not warming up to the woman who tried to beat me to death."

"You can't keep your mouth shut for one damn second, can you, _Copperhead_?" Phasma growled as she whipped his head towards him and the redhead sat up with a sneer.

"Do something about it, _Cottonmouth_." 

"Oh, you little shit, talking to me in that tone!" Phasma quickly scrambled and darted towards him, Hux yelping loudly as he bolted up and started running. "OI, COME BACK!"

"NO _FUCKING_ WAY!"

"Kylo...?" Rey opened the flap of the tent and stuck her head out with a sleepy expression and he instantly stood up, rushing over and stepping into the tent. "What's going on out there...?" 

"Wolves being--" He cut himself off as he heard Hux scream and fall to the ground as Phasma pounced on him. "Wolves being wolves."

"You guys are crazy." Rey chuckled tiredly as she laid back down, her bare skin exposed to the air and Kylo had to bury his instincts down deep at the sight.

"Do you want me to tell them to shut up...or..." Kylo tilted his head to the side as his eyes hungrily devoured her very image. _That's mine_ , his instincts crooned. _That's all mine_.

"Mmn, no, I'm just going to go back to sleep," Rey yawned as she turned over on her side and Kylo growled softly at the sight of her plump ass. "But thank you for offering."

"Are you still in pain?" He muttered as his instincts fully came over him, Kylo flipping her over on her back and getting on top of her.

"Wha--Kylo, I can't right now! Yes, I'm still in--"

"I can fix that," He moved down and spread her thighs, his eyes glowing as he stared down at her cunt with hungry eyes. "I can help."

"K-Kylo--"

"Just tell me if I can," He inhaled sharply as his eyes snapped up to hers, her hands gripping her thighs tightly. "Just give me permission, Rey."

"I-I--um..." Rey blushed darkly as she glanced away, biting her lower lip as she thought. "I-I...uh...mmn..." She could barely think with those starving eyes trained on her, glowing in the darkness of the tent like two lanterns whose flames wanted to lick her skin until she was nothing left but ash.

"Luna, _please_ ," He rasped out as he put her legs over her shoulders, his grip on her thighs never loosening. "Let me help."

She gave him a single nod and his head was suddenly between her thighs, his tongue darting out as he licked a hot stripe between her folds. Rey squeaked loudly and gripped the sides of the cot as his eyes closed, a pleased growl escaping his throat before he began to eat her out ravenously like a starving animal who hadn't eaten for days.

Soon she was moaning, bucking up and rolling her hips needily, but he quickly held her down as his tongue and mouth worked her exquisitely. His nose bumped into her clit as he delved even further, his hips pressed tightly against the cot as he growled loudly into her cunt.

She looked down to see that his eyes were open once more and trained on her, Rey nearly cumming at the glowing gaze.

The sounds were wet, messy, and possibly even more obscene than the sounds of him fucking her back at the saloon. Her eyes rolled back as he sucked her clit, the brunette attempting to buck her hips up once more but he held her down like molasses stuck on tree bark. There was no way she could move her hips.

"K-Kylo--Kylo, Kylo, Kylo--" She hit her head harshly against the pillow as he continued, her heartbeat pounding in her ears as her breathing sped up. "Close, close, clo--"

She was cut off by him coming up and kissing her heatedly, Rey moaning loudly into his mouth at the taste of herself on his tongue. He struck a hand down between her thighs and began to furiously rub her clit back and forth with his index and middle finger, Rey unable to stop herself from cumming at the sensation of his gloves on her most sensitive skin.

Rey screamed as she yanked back from the kiss and Kylo breathed shakily as he pulled his hand up, looking at the wetness on his fingers like it was goddamn liquid gold. 

"F-fuck, Kylo-- _oh, my God_ \--" Rey froze as he stuck his fingers in his mouth without breaking eye contact with her, sucking her wetness off before pulling them out and smirking.

"You're beyond sweet," He purred and Rey's head hit the pillow as she cursed loudly and squeezed her eyes shut. "You know that?"

"O-oh...oh, you're too much," She breathed shakily as she threw an arm over her eyes. "Christ..."

"Feel better, I hope?" He chuckled as he teasingly rubbed her clit in circular motions with his thumb, Rey yelping loudly as she jerked her hips up. "I could do this all mornin', Rey. I really, _really_ could."

"Y-you--you're going to kill me," Rey took her arm away from her eyes as she looked at him and he stilled his hand.

"Well," He muttered as he pulled his hand back and got off the cot, starting to undress to crawl in beside her. "We wouldn't want that, would we? Where would I be if you died?" He tore off his gloves and threw them down on the ground beside his hat (which she had placed there with the utmost of care because that hat was slowly becoming her favorite thing).

"You keep saying that..." Rey sighed and he smiled. 

"Because it's true," His shirt and vest were off now, Rey wanting to drag her hands down his chest just at the sight of it. "You're the reason I'm being held down to earth and not fallin' into Hell, don't you know that?"

"What a big responsibility," She hummed as he kicked off his boots and took his socks off before taking off his belt and pants. "It's like the story of Atlas."

"Atlas? Like a map?" He crawled into the cot with her and she laughed while shaking her head, throwing one leg over his thighs before resting her head on his chest.

"No, no! In Greek Mythology, Atlas was a titan who was forced to hold up the heavens for eternity after the Titanomachy--where Zeus defeated all of the titans and became King of the Gods." 

"Really?" He smiled up at the ceiling of the tent as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "I was never big into literature, I do apologize."

"I love to read," Rey sighed softly as she closed her eyes. "Father Kenobi had so many books, you wouldn't believe."

"I'll get you books then." He hummed as he closed his eyes and relaxed, the both of them falling into the comforting silence of the dawn and each other's safe embrace.

\-----------------------------------------------------------

Rey awoke early afternoon with Kylo still laying beside her, his chest rising and falling slowly as he slept. Rey bit her lower lip with a smile as she sat up slightly, her fingertips brushing against his cheek ever so gently. 

She traced the scar she gave him on the right side of his face, her eyes becoming serious as her smile faded. She remembered slicing his face open, the way his blood spurted on her face and the look of utter shock and betrayal in his eyes before he began to laugh.

It had terrified her, the way he had laughed in delight at her mauling the right side of his face, and her hand stilled as she furrowed her brows. 

_Devil_ , a venomous voice hissed in her mind. _Monster_.

But when he slowly opened his blazing amber eyes, there was no monstrosity to be seen within them. There was no evil, no psychotic intent. There was a softness, there was a gentle love that was reserved for her and her alone.

"Rey," He gently took her hand as he whispered her name, Rey not even realizing she was crying until she felt a couple tears slide down her cheeks. "Are you okay...?"

"Yeah," Her voice was barely a whisper, letting out a shaky breath as she found herself unable to move. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just old ghosts."

"I happen to like the scar," He have her a crooked smile and her lips slowly parted. How did he know that that was what she was focusing on? "It's almost like a first kiss, in my eyes. It was how I knew you actually, genuinely cared."

"People don't scar people they care about--"

"See," He sighed as he laced their fingers together. "That's where you're just wrong." His eyes were burning into hers and she swallowed the lump in her throat as he kissed her knuckles softly while closing his eyes.

"How could you not care about me if you left a permanent mark on me? You knew that each time I'd look in the mirror, I'd see you, and I _love_ that. I love you," He purred quietly as he reopened his eyes. "I have since the moment you held a shotgun to my face and told me the walls would look lovely red."

She ripped her hand away from his to grab his face, kissing him fiercely as she squeezed her eyes shut and he instantly kissed back. _You chose this_ , that venomous voice hissed once more. _You chose this because you like--no, you love it, don't you? You always say you were of God, even convinced Father Kenobi, but you were always of the Devil all along._

Kylo sat up and pulled her into his lap, Rey taking no time in grabbing him by the base of his cock and lowering herself onto it. Kylo let out a shaky breath as he clung tightly to her as she situated herself on him, Rey ignoring the searing pain in her lower abdomen as she did so. 

She instantly started moving her hips, tangling her hands in his hair as she pressed their foreheads together while he met her movements. They stayed silent, both of them letting out shuddering breaths and small groans with a kiss every now and then.

 _You chose this because you know, deep down, that you were never for God. Too much death has followed you, too much pain and suffering, and so you've decided to be with the one that the Devil calls his own._ "K-Kylo," Rey broke the silence as she uttered his name, Kylo pulling her in for another kiss as he grabbed her ass with one hand as his other hand rested on the small of her back. "Kylo, _I love you_."

Kylo ripped back from the kiss and suddenly sank his elongated upper and lower canines into her left shoulder, Rey screaming bloody murder as she threw her head back and felt blood stream down her collarbone to her breast. 

He bit down harder and Rey screamed again as she sank her nails into his shoulders, their hips never stilling as he returned the favor of her scarring him.

He pulled back and kissed her then, his mouth tasting of copper, and all Rey could do was kiss back. All she could do was pour her love out into a singular kiss as her own blood streamed down her body, wetting her skin and only reminding her that, yes, she had chosen this. 

And while she knew that this bite wouldn't turn her, wouldn't make her become like him, it was still a step closer. It was still a leap towards the abyss of Hell, and she found herself silently horrified that she did, in fact, _love it_.

_You never stood a chance against the Devil because he's been inside of you all along._


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for not updating for so long ;-; I had the worst writer's block ever, and I literally wrote at least seven different versions of this chapter before finally deciding that this one was the best. Seriously, seven different variations, and all of them were completely different.
> 
> This is kind of just a filler chapter, and I'll try to update soon! I really hope this writer's block goes away ;-;

There's almost something melancholy about first waking up. Sleep still clings to you, begs you to fall back into its mellow embrace. It tugs at your eyes, whispers its lullaby into your subconscious, and, sometimes, you listen. You close your eyes, you sink back into the void, and you let everyone and everything slip away until a later time.

But Rey had never been one to listen.

The first thing she felt when she awoke was searing pain in her left shoulder, her body instantly tensing up as she bit back a scream of pure, unadulterated agony. She clenched and unclenched her fists, her jaw clenched painfully tight as she squeezed her eyes shut. A small, choked noise escaped her lips, and she suddenly felt Kylo's arm slowly wrap around her from behind.

"Grit your teeth and fight through the pain," He whispered and Rey breathed shakily as she opened her eyes. "You can do it, I know you can."

"It _hurts_ \--"

"I know," He gently rolled her over onto her back, his aureate eyes darting to her wounded shoulder. Four deep puncture wounds lay deep within her skin with dry blood caked around them heavily. To most eyes, it would look like pure horror. But to his, it was beyond one of the most beautiful sights he had ever seen. "I know, I'm sorry."

"Y-you're--you're proud of them," Rey inhaled sharply and his eyes flicked up to hers.

"Yes," There was that deep tone; that sinful baritone with rough edges. "Yes, I won't lie. I'm more than proud of them, Rey. Now we both have ultimate proposals of love from each other...besides, you know, you finally tellin' me that you loved me."

 _...Fuck, I did do that._ In all honesty, Rey wasn't familiar with this type of love was. She knew what Philautia (self love), Philia (affectionate love), and Storge (familiar love) were, but this wasn't those type of loves. No, this was Eros (romantic love) and Mania (obsessive love) combined. This was the most dangerous of loves, and she wasn't entirely sure if she was going to come out of it sane.

Perhaps she would lose her mind just like Kylo. Perhaps she would, as Hux had put it, become 'just as mad as he is'.

 _Devil's child_ , that venomous voice was back. _Loving the sheer evil of the man before you. You love the pain, you love that he marked you. You love being his, don't you?_

"...I did," Her voice was so quiet, so meek and almost invisible as she tried to ignore her vicious conscience. "I did, yes."

"I'm happy," He smiled as he pushed her hair back, and Rey instantly relaxed at his touch. "I'm so, so happy you were finally able to admit that you love me. I know you've been fightin' it since the beginnin', but I'm so happy that those three little words finally left your lips."

"Y-yeah?" She cleared her throat and he nodded happily. God, she would kill for that smile--hang on, wait, _what_? "Um, you know what? I think--I think I'm hungry! Yep, I'm starving, oh, wow! Just...so hungry, yeah, I'm gonna go make food--"

"Oh, ha-ha," He pressed his hand down on her stomach, Rey letting out a loud ' _oof_ ' sound at practically being pinned against the cot. "You're not movin', don't even think of tryin' to get up."

"I--excuse me, why not?" She narrowed her eyes and he arched a brow. "I can very well move if I would like, you do not control me--"

"I will make you food, but you're not gettin' up on your own. You're in pain, ain't you? You honestly think I'm gonna have you walkin' around in pain?"

"It's your fault, not mine, for biting me and then fucking me like a--"

"Makin' love," He frowned and Rey nearly choked on her own spit.

" _What_?"

"You finally admitted you loved me, like I just said. I know you did, you were just burying it deep down, but you finally understood that we've been in love since the moment we met. So," He sighed as he leaned down and nuzzled her cheek affectionately. "We were makin' love, not fuckin'."

 _Jesus fucking Christ. Okay._ "Ha-ha, yeah...making love," Rey laughed nervously and Kylo hummed quietly as he looked back at the wounds after pulling back. "That's...what we were doing earlier. Making...love." She hated that terminology, in all honesty, because sex in her mind was just fucking. Sex had never been special for her, it had been a means to make money, but she supposed now it was special. I mean, Christ, it _had_ to be special with the intense emotions she felt for him. 

\---------------------------------------------------------------

Rey stared into her reflection in the small lake Kylo had taken her to not but thirty minutes after she had awoken, slowly reaching out and touching the water. It rippled, distorting her reflection, and for a brief moment, she wondered if the rippled reflection was what she truly looked like on the inside.

Everything felt chaotic, distorted, and overall...confusing. "Am I where I'm supposed to be?" She whispered to the water, sighing loudly after a moment as she looked up at the afternoon sky. 

She knew she wouldn't get an answer. The wind couldn't talk, now, could it?

She took a deep breath as she closed her eyes, letting the wind gently caress her skin and hair as she fell into a state of deep relaxation. She felt Kylo sit behind her and gently pull her hair back, Rey slowly opening one eye as she felt him begin to loosely braid it.

"Are you--where the hell did you learn how to braid?" Rey scoffed and Kylo chuckled softly. 

"My mom," He chuckled again and Rey opened her other eye as she frowned. "She was really big into braids, you know? She always had some sorta braid in her hair, and she'd let me braid her hair when I was but nothin' but a half pint."

"Do you...miss her?" Rey asked quietly and she felt his hands still as he inhaled slowly.

"...Yes," Kylo whispered and Rey glanced down as she sighed softly. "Yes, I do. Sometimes I swear I can see her out of the corner of my eye, almost like she's hauntin' me." 

Rey looked over her shoulder at him to see him looking away with a far off gaze in his eyes, his eyes snapping over to hers after a moment as he smiled. "But it wasn't my fault, I gotta remember that. It was all Snoke, I never hurt her. Ever."

"I know you didn't," Rey fully turned around as he let go of her hair, climbing into his lap and draping her arms around his neck. "I know you wouldn't lie to me." 

"Yeah," He placed his hands on her hips as he leaned in and gently nuzzled her neck. "Yeah." 

They sat there for a moment, just listening to the wind around them as they basked in the comfortable silence of each other. He was just holding her, his chin resting on her shoulder with his eyes closed, and she was staring off in the distance and enjoying the calm quietness of it all.

She wanted to ask questions about Snoke, about how everything had even began with him, but she decided to keep her mouth shut. He was comfortable in this moment, his body relaxed and free of any tension, and Rey didn't want to ruin the moment for him. 

Rey abruptly got out of his lap and took her dress and shoes off, she having found no need earlier to put on undergarments for just going to the lake, while Kylo watched her curiously as she did. She looked up at him before turning around and going towards the lake, stepping into it and inhaling deeply as she waded into its green waters.

"Rey, what are you doin'? I don't want you walkin'--"

"I'm swimming," Rey answered and Kylo slowly stood up. "And you should join me." It sounded more like an order than a suggestion, and he took a step towards the lake as she looked over her shoulder before completely disappearing into the jade waters.

Kylo paused for a moment before cursing under his breath when she didn't come back up, running into the water with his clothes on because, simply, he didn't care.

She was more important than his clothes and boots.

"Rey, goddammit, this isn't--" He was cut off by a hand grabbing his ankle and pulling him under, and then he saw her.

When they say that God sends angels to earth, most people say that's nonsense. Why would an angel, a being of pure light, come down to such a sinful rock filled with such sinful people? How could they look upon humans and see them as God's gift, when all they do is destroy and plunder what God gave to them in the first place?

But he was seeing an angel with his very own eyes, and this angel was staring back at him. 

Rey's hair floated around her head like a dark, shining halo, and her eyes almost seemed to shimmer in the water like gemstones which had just been polished. She grabbed his face with her hands and pressed their lips together after a moment, and Kylo felt as if light itself had kissed him as she did so.

His mother once told him what drowning felt like, as she had almost drowned as a child, and all he could hear was her voice ringing in his head.

_"There's a certain peace you feel as you near the end of drowning. An acceptance, an understanding, and so you let go. You just let go, Ben. Nothing matters anymore but the light above, and the water around you."_

But he didn't care about the water, or the light above, or the burning sensation in his lungs, because _she_ was there. Rey was right there, and she was giving him all the air and life he needed.

Rey pulled back after a minute before swimming back up to the surface, taking Kylo with her, and once they reached the surface, they both gasped for air before she started laughing.

"God! God, that was _exhilarating_! Was your vision going black around the edges as well?" Rey laughed again as she pushed her hair back, Kylo staying silent as he only stared at her.

"No? Yes?" Rey arched a brow and Kylo inhaled sharply before looking away.

That moment of light had gone the second they came back up, and her halo had vanished.

How could he forget how reckless she could be? Was her favorite pastime flirting with Death himself? It must be, with the little stunt she just pulled.

"Were you tryin' to drown us?" Kylo asked and Rey laughed again as she shook her head. 

"No! God, no! I'm not suicidal, it just seemed like fun--"

"We don't have time for fun--"

"Why?" Rey's tone suddenly turned harsh and he looked back at her as they both stayed afloat in the water. "Because of Snoke?"

"Fuckin' obviously! Yes, because of Snoke! We need to get goin'--"

"And why can't we just stay and fight him?!" Rey snapped and Kylo clenched his jaw as he looked away once more. "Why can't we--"

"You really just don't listen, do you, Rey?" Kylo bit out angrily and Rey silently seethed. "I tell you he's killed my family, I tell you he's goin' kill you, and what do you say? 'Why can't we just stay and fight him'!" His pitch went higher as he impersonated her in the most irritating fashion possible, and that was the last straw.

"I do _not_ sound that annoying!" Rey snapped as she splashed him in the face violently, Kylo jerking his head back before growling loudly.

"You do when you don't _listen_!" He splashed her just as violently and Rey cried out before throwing herself at him, pulling him back down into the water only for him to immediately come back up, and then only for him to go back down as they wrestled in the water.

"I can hear the both of you splashing all the way from the camp," Kylo and Rey's head whipped towards the sound of Phasma's voice, the blonde standing there with a metal flask in one hand and the other hand on her belt. "You two trying to drown each other? Is this another twisted declaration of love?"

"He wishes I would drown him!" Rey shoved his head underwater only for Kylo to instantly come back up with a scowl on his face.

"Right, well," Phasma sighed as she took a swig from her flask. "We should get going soon, yeah? You can...air dry on the road, Kylo."

"She thinks we can stay and fight him!" Kylo barked and Rey hissed at him. "Can you believe that?! Can you please, _please_ tell her that we can't do nothin' of the sort?! Can you talk some sense into her, because it seems that I can't! She's just a stick in the mud about this whole goddamned situation, and she doesn't understand that we're only doin' this for her safety!"

"Christ, Rey. Is this true?" Phasma frowned before taking another swig and Rey mumbled incoherently as she looked away. "We can't stay and fight him. I know you want to, with your reckless personality, but look at you! You are just this itty-bitty, teeny-tiny little thing, and Snoke will rip you in half the moment he gets his claws on you. Literal and metaphorical claws, in this sense."

"But the silver bullets I've seen you loading in your guns--"

"Will only work in close range! You've got to at least be a good feet away in order to get a lethal shot, don't you? And you'd be dead before you even pulled the trigger. So," Phasma took her hand off her belt to point her thumb behind her back towards the camp. "Get out of the lake, shake off the water, get dressed, and let's go. Sunset is in a couple of hours, and we're going to be riding for most of the night. Come on." Phasma turned around before pausing.

"I didn't see anything, Kylo, don't worry. The water is hiding her...bare bits." Phasma cleared her throat loudly before walking off and vanishing towards the camp.

Rey grumbled to herself as she sank down into the water until only her eyes and the top of her head was visible, and Kylo looked down at her with a slightly agitated expression.

"Will you listen to her if not me?" Kylo narrowed his eyes and Rey slowly came back up.

"...I'm just tired of running," She whispered and Kylo's anger slowly melted away. "I've been running away emotionally for five years, and now I'm physically running. It's tiring." Rey muttered before swimming back to the shore, Kylo quickly following her.

"But it's for your protection--"

"But it's _tiring_! Maybe--maybe I want to settle down on the prairie or something, you think of that? Make a house? Just live in the countryside, have a--have a fucking field of flowers to spin around in!" Rey's tone was sharp as she got out of the water and Kylo quickly followed her onto land.

"With me?" She could hear that puppy-like tone in his voice, and she whirled around to face him.

"Who else?!" Rey snapped for the umpteenth time that day and Kylo's eyes softened. "Who else would I want to build a house with, Kylo?! Did I not tell you that I love you?!"

Even if her tone was angry, her words melted his heart damn near into a puddle. "Oh...oh, Luna, I'd love to build a house with you--"

"Fucking same!" Rey practically shouted and they stood there for a moment before Rey snorted out a laugh. "I'm--I'm sorry, you're soaking wet--"

"Oh, I get it," Kylo deadpanned as he looked down at himself. "'Wet dog'."

"Yeah!" Rey burst into loud laughter as she doubled over, holding her sides as she laughed even harder. "Y-yeah! Yeah, you get it!"

"Ha-ha...hilarious," Kylo mumbled before shaking himself off slightly as Rey wiped tears of mirth from her eyes. "Said no one ever."

"Aw, no, come on!" Rey smiled and Kylo rolled his eyes as he bit back an equal smile. 

"Kylo--Kylo, I'm sorry," Rey sighed as she closed her eyes for a brief second. "I'm just--"

"Tired? Annoyed? Agitated?" Kylo gave her a small smile and Rey nodded as she put her hands on her hips, looking down while she pressed her lips tightly together.

"I get it, I really do, trust me. Being on the road constantly is...very tiring," Kylo chuckled as he bent down to pick up her dress, standing back up to hand it to her before pausing and looking at her shoulder with wide eyes. "...Shit--shit, shit, Rey--"

Rey looked down at her shoulder to see the four puncture wounds bleeding, the brunette cursing under her breath as the pain of them hit all of her at once. "I-I'll clean them--"

"I should've cleaned the wounds the moment you woke up! And I should've bandaged them, too! Christ on a stick, I'm awful for not doin' so!" He groaned loudly in a guilty tone before stepping forward, reaching out to touch the wounds before stopping himself. "They...hurt, right? So, I shouldn't touch them?"

"Yeah, they hurt," Rey laughed breathlessly as she pressed her dress against them which caused her to hiss and wince, not exactly caring if the dress got blood on it. It was black anyways, it's not like it would show. "But I'll be fine. I've had worse wounds."

"...Really? You've had a worse wound?"

"Believe it or not, I've been shot before--"

That sentence nearly gave Kylo whiplash by the sheer forceful impact it had on him. "Where?!"

"Here," Rey pointed to a faint scar on her left thigh that was barely even noticeable. "It was some random stranger who passed through Niima Outpost who got too rowdy at the saloon. The bullet only grazed me, though. So, I guess I haven't been _completely_ shot before. It still kind of counts, though, right?" Rey tilted her head as she stared down at the scar, and Kylo bit the inside of his cheek to keep himself from lashing out.

If he could, he'd find the person who shot her, and tear them in half right down the middle. He wouldn't even eat them, that's how much he hated this random stranger from her past. Their flesh would probably taste too bitter, anyways. To him, at least. Anyone that ever tried to hurt Rey, his Luna, would taste bitter in his mouth.

"That's not a worse wound, though--"

"Not all wounds have to be physical." Rey cut him off as she looked back at him, and he saw a whirlpool of past memories flooding within her eyes. "Most of my wounds are emotional, and believe me when I say that they are much worse than the one on my shoulder. You can relate, can't you?"

"...Yeah," Kylo's tone was suddenly quiet and Rey gave him a single nod. "Yeah, I get it. I get it."

"...I'm sorry for making you think I was trying to drown you," Rey sighed as she put her dress back on after putting her shoes on, wincing as the cloth rubbed against the puncture wounds. "I wasn't. If I were to kill you, it'd be much more brutal than that."

"Don't flirt with me right now." Kylo scoffed as he looked down at his soaking wet clothes again. He _hated_ wet clothes with a passion, but he had to go into the lake when she wasn't coming back up. Fear almost always overrides logic in certain situations, doesn't it? And that had definitely been a certain situation in his mind.

"Only you think that someone threatening you is a form of flirtation--"

"Coming from you?" Kylo looked back up at her with a grin. "Threats from you are the purest form of flirtation I've ever received, darlin'."

"Bite me." Rey stuck her tongue out and Kylo grinned even wider.

"I already did." He replied smugly, and Rey wanted to punch him in the face for that remark.

"You, sir, make me want to tear my own hair out--"

"Oh, Luna," Kylo purred out as he held his arms out with the most smug expression she had ever seen. "You can't blame the wolf, the lamb's _delicious_."

"The--lamb?! I'm a fucking lamb to you?! I am _not_ a lamb!" Rey shot out before yelping as he tossed her over in shoulder in a gentle fashion, and she didn't even fight back because she knew there was no point. 

"If anything I'm like a...a fox," Rey muttered angrily as he began to walk back towards the camp. "But I am _not_ a lamb. Lambs are cuddly, and sweet, and innocent, and I am _none_ of those things."

"Mhm," Kylo chuckled and Rey rolled her eyes in annoyance. "You're more like a wolf pup who's too rowdy for her britches, that's what you are. But you taste like lamb, and I mean that in the sweetest way."

"...I am _not_ a lamb."


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is short, I know, and I apologize ;-; I still have writer's block

A week had past, and Rey wasn't even certain what state they were in anymore.

There was always the canyons, always the rivers, always the lakes, and always the endless sky. 

She had gotten to know Phasma much better, still keeping her distance from Hux, and she was finally understanding that the wind, in fact, had answered her question at the lake.

This was where she was supposed to be. There was no longer doubt about that, and she knew better than to fight against the gnarled hands of fate.

It wasn't until the final day of the week that Rey had nearly fell off of Kylo's horse and cried up to the heavens as they came across an actual town.

She had also nearly fallen off and cried when she realized she was riding into said town with three outlaws who were notoriously known and had wanted posters plastered in every town and city in America.

And she could see those wanted posters right now on numerous town building walls amongst others.

"Phasma," Rey hissed quietly from where she was seated behind Kylo, the blonde looking over at her with a smile.

"Hey, Rey, what's up?" Phasma chirped and Rey tried to ignore the townspeople murmuring on the streets, their prying eyes following the four like hawks. 

"Um, maybe we should have, oh, I don't know," Rey laughed nervously as she shrunk down slightly, Kylo smirking at her nervousness. "Came in through the...back way?"

"'The back way'? There's a back way? Geez, we didn't see it." Hux announced loudly in an annoyed tone and Rey almost yanked off her (Kylo's) hat and threw it at him.

The key word here is 'almost'. She had grown awfully attached to it, only taking it off to bathe and sleep.

"I-I don't know, we could've snuck in--"

"Oh, darlin', where's the fun in that?" Kylo cooed as he looked over his shoulder at her, Rey huffing loudly as she looked down and away.

"We're all going to get shot here," Rey murmured and Phasma laughed loudly at that, holding onto her white hat as she threw her head backwards. 

"Us? Shot? Oh, Rey, you haven't seen us in combat yet!" Phasma laughed louder and Rey's cheeks turned red as she glared downwards. 

"You know I got you, right?" Kylo spoke softly and she looked up at him. "You know that I'm not goin' to let anyone harm you?"

"But--but what about you...?" Rey swallowed and Kylo blinked before scoffing loudly with a smile and looking back forward.

"She does realize we could kill everyone here in approximately two minutes, correct?" Phasma leaned over and Kylo glanced over at her. 

"She's just scared for me." Kylo whispered and Phasma's eyes widened before a smile grew on her lips. 

Phasma really had enjoyed watching their bond strengthen over the last week, and it brought her great joy to see Kylo smiling more and more every day.

"She doesn't need to be. She should be scared for the townspeople. I'm starving, and some of them look like rather good lunch." Hux chuckled and Rey squeezed her eyes shut even tighter as she heard that.

"Oh, I'm sure we'll eat. I don't have any doubts about that." Phasma grinned back at Hux and Rey's eyes flew open as she felt Kylo's horse halt and Kylo get off.

"Rey," Rey blinked before looking over to her side to see Kylo standing their with his arms reached out towards her. "Jump, I've got you."

Rey jumped off the horse and into his arms without hesitance, Kylo instantly catching her and kissing her jaw before putting her down on the ground.

"Stay close to me, yeah?" Kylo smiled and Rey nodded before looking over to see Phasma and Hux already off of their horses, the both of them walking their horses over to the saloon while talking amongst themselves.

"Um," Rey started as Kylo grabbed something from his saddlebag. "Should they not be coming with us into the inn? Is the saloon a really good idea in this large of a town where you're all wanted dead or alive?"

"Oh, they can take care of themselves," Kylo chuckled as he opened the small leather bag he grabbed from the saddlebag only for Rey to see endless bills inside of them. "They always have."

"How--how did you get that much money?" Rey whispered and Kylo looked over at her.

"Dead people can't exactly use money, now, can they, darlin'?" Kylo grinned before handing it to her, and Rey slowly took it with furrowed brows.

"I think it's a tad bit rude that you steal money from your victims--"

"Oh, the stealin' part is rude? Not the whole murderin' and then eatin' them part?" Kylo smirked and Rey glowered at him before clenching her jaw. 

"You're so cute when you're angry," Kylo tilted her chin up before patting her cheek affectionately. "You know that?"

"Don't tell me I'm cute after handing me a bag of dead people's money." Rey hissed behind clenched teeth and Kylo hummed softly as he looked towards the saloon.

"Get rooms, okay?" Kylo looked back at her and Rey's eye twitched as she realized that he was going to go follow after Hux and Phasma. "I'll be back in two shakes of a lamb's tail, I promise."

"No," Rey grabbed his wrist and yanked him towards the inn as she started walking. He blinked before quickly walking behind her, something deep within him growling loudly in pleasure at how tight she was gripping his wrist. "You're coming with me, so I can supervise you. I'm sorry, but I refuse to trust you in a town."

"Oh, that hurts a bit, Luna," Kylo sighed dramatically as she continued to drag him towards the innkeeper's desk. "I wouldn't make a ruckus--"

"Yes, you would, and don't even lie." Rey seethed as she continued walking forward, ignoring the eyes within the inn that were staring at both her and the outlaw.

Did this make her an outlaw, too, now? She supposed it did, and it unnerved her that that didn't really phase her. Then again, she had become desensitized to a lot of things in the past two weeks since she had met Kylo.

"Mmn, you're right," Kylo sighed as he glanced over at a woman staring at him with fear in her eyes, and he had to hold himself back from snapping his jaws at her with a wolfish grin. "I probably would."

"I know you would!" Rey bit out before halting in front of the desk, slamming the bag down onto it as she glared at the innkeeper.

He looked at her and then at Kylo, his eyes flicking back to hers as he swallowed loudly. "Are--are you, um, being--"

"Held hostage? Who looks like the one who's bein' held hostage here?" Kylo rolled his eyes in annoyance before Rey's eyes lit up with an idea that would assure Kylo and his gang's safety.

"I'm a bounty hunter," Rey stated and Kylo choked loudly in surprise as he looked down at her with wide eyes. "And I'm delivering Kylo Ren, Gwendolyn Phasma, and Armitage Hux to...to New York to be executed. By a judge. Hung. They'll be hung. Until they're dead." Rey cleared her throat loudly as she drummed her hands on the desk and the innkeeper stared at her with eyes just as wide as Kylo's.

"Then...where are the other two...?" The innkeeper asked nervously and Rey grimaced.

"They're at the saloon, but they won't run. I have their leader," Rey yanked Kylo forward, Kylo suppressing the urge to laugh at her plan. It was a good plan to keep everyone away from them, yes, but Rey didn't look like a bounty hunter in the slightest. "And they won't go anywhere without him. They're a...uh, like a pack. He's the head...wolf."

Kylo did laugh then and Rey glared up at him. "Oh, no, forgive me, Miss bounty hunter. I didn't mean to laugh at your analogy."

"...One room?" The innkeeper squeaked out and Rey looked back at him before shaking her head. 

"Three." Rey sighed and the innkeeper looked as if he wanted to ask why, but quickly went against it as he just nodded his head. 

\------------------------------------------------------------------

Rey sank into the hot bath water as she closed her eyes, letting the steam fill her senses as she exhaled loudly.

She cracked one eye open to see Kylo crouching beside the metal tub, his arms resting against the edge as he smiled at her happily.

"Hey, Miss bounty hunter." Kylo smiled wider and Rey opened her other eye as she deadpanned before splashing him. Kylo jerked back and shook his head, blinking a few times before grinning wildly.

"I only did that to save your sorry behinds from the law enforcement in this town, you moron. Now, no one will mess with us, and I expect a thank you."

"Oh, you do?" Kylo leered as he leaned forward until their faces were inches apart. "And what if I don't say 'thank you, Miss Rey'?"

"...I could very easily drown you," Rey blinked and Kylo barked out a laugh as he pulled back. Both her and Kylo knew she no longer had the desire to kill him.

"Between your thighs? Yes, I would very much like to die that death." Kylo winked and Rey splashed him again only for him to laugh loudly.

"You're perverted!" Rey couldn't help as she attempted to splash him again only for him to grab her wrist.

"For you? Yes. Yes, I am."

"Where the hell did you learn how to talk to women? You're awful at it."

"Oh, you think my form of flirtation is awful?" Kylo's hand on her wrist tightened and Rey tensed up. 

"I am a mess with words, sure," He pulled her forward until their faces were inches apart yet again, Kylo running his thumb across her lower lip with his free hand. "But I think my actions are much clearer." His voice was like burning satin, and Rey felt it directly melt into her nerves. 

"Would you not agree?" He slowly smiled and Rey bit her lower lip as she stayed silent. 

"Wolf got your tongue?" Kylo grinned and Rey breathed out a laugh at this as she glanced down.

"That's not the saying--"

"No, you're correct, it ain't, but I think it fits better." Kylo let go of her wrist before standing up. He began to get undressed and Rey automatically moved forward so he could get in.

He got in behind her after a few moments, pulling her flush against him and resting his chin on her shoulder.

Rey sighed softly as she closed her eyes as she felt him slide his hands up her sides. 

Fifteen minutes later and they were both out of the tub, Rey drying off as he lay on his back in the bed with his eyes closed.

She looked over at him after a moment, pausing her movements as she stared at him. She slowly walked over, letting her towel drop as she crawled onto the bed and straddled him.

Kylo's eyes slowly opened as Rey held his face in her hands as she stared down at him. He stared back up at her before taking one of her hands and kissing her palm tenderly, their gaze never breaking.

"How could Death be so warm?" Rey breathed out and Kylo paused before cracking a smile.

"Oh, Luna, I'm not Death." Kylo smiled wider. "I'm just one of his messengers, that's all."

She stayed silent at that and Kylo sucked in his breath before dropping her hand. "What's eatin' at you, Rey? You got that look in your eye that's tellin' me that somethin' ain't sittin' right with you. Is it...me?" His eyes grew sad and Rey instantly shook her head.

"No! No, no, no, it's not you!" Rey shook her head again as she waved her hands frantically before sighing and laying on top of him. He instantly wrapped his arms around her, a soft sigh of relief escaping his lips.

"It's...it's just--" Rey breathed shakily before squeezing her eyes shut.

There are different types of fear known to mankind, and all of them bring different sensations to the nervous system. 

There is the fear of failure; a fear that takes a hold of your mind and tells you that you are absolutely nothing and you will never amount to anything ever again if you fail the task at hand.

There is the fear of pain; a fear that digs its claws into you and whispers into your ear that emotional pain and physical pain are one and the same, and you'll never return to happiness after its searing kiss onto your mind and skin.

And then there is the fear of now, and it is the most deadly. This fear tells you that you aren't and never will be enough, and it whispers to you that you will never be where you wish to be. 

And Rey was feeling the fear of now.

"I want to make it out of this alive, Kylo," Rey opened her eyes and Kylo's arms automatically tightened around her. "And I want you to, too. Same for Phasma, and, as much as I hate to say this...same for Hux, too. Although, I wouldn't mind him losing a limb or an eye or both. You know, just for good times sake."

"We will," Kylo frowned at her doubt and Rey perked her head up to look at him. "We're already in Colorado, we've made it across two states already. We're outrunnin' him."

"...Yeah," Rey nodded slowly as she tried to push the fear out of her system. "Yeah, yeah. Yeah."

Well, at least she knew what state they were in now. 

"Try to get some sleep, okay? I know you need it." Kylo smiled halfheartedly and Rey nodded before laying her head back against his chest and closing her eyes.

The last thing she heard before she drifted off to sleep was him telling her that he loved her. 

\------------------------------------------------------------------

_"F-Father, it's okay! It's okay, I've got you!" Young Rey choked out as she held Reverend Kenobi's body in her arms as she sat on the desert ground on her knees, her entire body trembling as she pressed a hand down against one of the extremely deep claw marks on his chest. "I-I've got you--"_

_Rey watched her younger self, knowing this nightmare well, but it was the first time she hadn't been in her younger self's first person view. She was standing directly behind herself, staring down at the scene unfold._

_"Kira," He breathed out hoarsely with a smile, blood spilling from his lips and staining his white beard. "It may have been the Devil who has taken me, but it is God I shall go to."_

_"No!" Both she and her younger self choked out, his warm blood staining her younger self's small hands as she desperately tried to stop the bleeding. She could see his internal wounds, his lower intestines hanging out of his stomach and young Rey tried to shove them back in a panic. "No, no, you're going to be okay! Father, please!"_

_Rey looked down at her hands to see them stained with his blood, just as her younger self's were. "N-no..."_

_"My child..." He coughed and both young Rey and Rey now couldn't hold back the tears any longer. "It's time." He spoke as he looked up at her, Rey freezing as she realized he was looking at her and not her younger self._

_Her younger self suddenly vanished and Reverend Kenobi sat up, Rey nearly vomiting at the sight of his innards hanging in his lap._

_"Kira," He whispered as he turned his head to point forward. "Look. Do you see the Devil? Do you see him?"_

_Rey nearly screamed as she saw a large humanoid silver wolf on the horizon, its golden eyes piercing into her very soul._

_"Run, Kira."_

Rey woke up screaming.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For Kylo's accent, y'all gotta remember that 1800s southern drawl is _vastly_ different from today's southern drawl. It is as smooth as molasses and practically dripping with honey.
> 
> Also, the next chapter will be action packed! I just like to write filler chapters every now and again ^^

Kylo instantly slammed his hand over Rey's mouth to get her to stop screaming as he whispered comforting words in her ear. Rey stared up at the ceiling with wide, teary eyes, her body trembling as fear still clung tightly to her nerves.

"Shh, shh," Kylo spoke quietly as he sat up, slowly taking his hand off of her mouth with concern written all over his face. Rey's eyes flicked over to his and she let out a small choke as tears rolled down her temples. 

"Rey, it was just a nightmare," Kylo whispered as he wiped her tears away, but Rey was convinced otherwise. Was it a repressed memory? Had she actually seen the silver werewolf as a child? "You're okay, okay? Don't--don't scream, you'll alert the town."

"I-I want to g-go home," Rey choked out and Kylo's eyes softened as he smoothed her hair back.

"I know, darlin'," His tone was the equivalent of a warm, soft blanket, and she wished she could curl up into it. "I know, and we'll make our own home soon enough, okay? You just gotta keep your head straight while we go through this. Can you do that for me? Can you keep your head straight?"

Rey whimpered loudly as she squeezed her eyes shut, her body trembling with the fear caused by the horrid nightmare.

The real question, which she had asked herself just moments ago, was: Was it a repressed memory? Or was it just a nightmare brought on by the situation?

She didn't know.

She reopened her eyes to see him staring down at her with a soft smile, his hand caressing her cheek as he stroked his thumb across her rosy flesh. "Did I ever tell you about the ghost that lived in the lake near my house when I was a child?"

"N-no," Rey sniffled and Kylo exhaled with a smile.

"Would you like me to?"

_He's...trying to distract me to get me to calm down._ Rey blinked away tears as she nodded, sniffling again as she leaned into his touch.

"You sure? It's pretty spooky." Kylo smirked and Rey nodded as she gave him a tiny smile.

"Alright, come 'ere," Kylo laid back down on his back and Rey snuggled up to him, resting her head on his chest as he wrapped an arm around her shoulder.

"My parents first moved to Georgia from Mississippi when my mother was pregnant with me," Kylo began, "They got this big ol' house for a good price, and my mother fell in love with it the very instant she saw it. She called it 'House of Heaven' because of how perfect it was in her eyes." Kylo paused for a moment before scoffing with a smile.

"It really was a beautiful house, and they lived alone in it until my uncle came to live with them when I was about five. It was all big and white with blue accents, and my mother painted each individual room the palest blue you ever did see. Each time I see that pale blue somewhere, I think of her. Her and her blue. She loved blue--she practically was the color blue, you know? I always found it funny that someone can be a certain color in your eyes, but they can be. They really, really can, and my mother was blue, blue, blue." 

Rey looked up at him to see a certain sadness she was all too acquainted with, and she placed her hand over his heart as she moved her head up to his shoulder. 

She wanted to say, ' _I'm sorry, I know what it's like. I know the pain, the hurt, and I'm right here,_ ', but she didn't. She kept quiet and, after a moment, Kylo inhaled sharply before continuing.

"Well, one day, about three months after I was born, she went down to the lake because she had sworn she saw our dog, Chewie, run off in that very direction," Kylo shifted so he could pull Rey closer. "And you know what she saw instead of Chewie?"

"What?" Rey whispered and Kylo grinned.

"She saw a woman floatin' above the water."

"She did not!" Rey gasped as she sat up to look down at him, Kylo only smiling up at her with eyes that told her that he was most certainly, in fact, not lying.

"Oh, but she did. There was a woman all dressed in white just floatin' above the water, and she was cryin' and searchin' the water for somethin'. My mother was almost certain the ghost was vicious, because when she turned to look at her, she pointed a finger in her direction and just _screamed_ \--"

"You're lying!" Rey gasped again as she gently smacked his bare chest only for Kylo to laugh and shake his head.

"I'm not! I'm really, really not!"

"God, that's terrifying!" Rey exhaled loudly as she hastily pushed her hair back. "What on God's earth did she do after that?"

"She ran back to the house, and this is where it gets even creepier," Kylo sat up as he grinned wildly. "She told my father all about it, tellin' him that she had ran after Chewie, and you know what he said?"

There was a pregnant pause as Rey waited in the uttermost suspension.

"He said 'Darlin', Chewie has been in the baby's room all evenin'.'"

"Oh, my God," Rey put her hand over her heart as she stared at him with wide eyes. "You're joking." 

"I'm really not," Kylo chuckled as he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "I wish I was, as that story scared the ever lovin' daylights out of me as a kid, but I ain't. That ghost wanted her to see her, and my mother most certainly saw her."

"Did she ever see her again?" Rey asked and Kylo shook his head as he smiled.

"Nope, she never saw her again because she absolutely refused to go near that lake again. Even I wasn't allowed near it, and neither was my uncle or father. My mother was terrified of that ghost, and she was almost certain that it had lured her out there to try and drown her or somethin'. My mother has always been afraid of water since she was a little girl, as she almost drowned, and she told me, 'There ain't no way in hell you're ever goin' near that lake', so I never did."

Kylo chuckled before continuing, "Later we learned that a woman used to live there, and she drowned her two children in that very lake before drownin' herself--"

"Good Lord, stop it!" Rey laughed as she hit his chest again. "God, what a nightmare! Are you trying to give me another nightmare, is that it, Kylo? Because I think you very well just might've!"

"But you stopped cryin'," Kylo spoke softly as he pulled her into his lap, Rey draping her arms around his neck as she pressed their foreheads together. "Didn't you?"

"I did," Rey sighed happily as she closed her eyes, basking in his warmth as she let all fear fade away. "Thank you."

She glanced towards the window after opening her eyes to see the sun rising, and a certain calm washed over her as small trickles of light began to pour in and drip onto the bed. Her Father had called the early light ' _sun drops_ ', and that was the only thing she could think of as the light grew.

"What was the nightmare about, if I may ask?" His question cut into the warm silence like a knife through butter.

"...Nothing," Rey pulled back with a smile as she shrugged. "Just a reoccurring one. That's all."

She saw no point in telling him about it, and she told herself that it couldn't possibly be a repressed memory.

She just wanted to forget about it.

\---------------------------------------------------------------

"Oh, Rey," Hux sighed as he sat beside her at the saloon counter that afternoon, Rey grimacing as she tightened her grip on the shot glass she was holding. 

"What the fuck do you want?" Rey hissed out and Hux smirked at her as he rested his elbows on the bar top, lacing his fingers together and resting his chin on top of his hands.

"I don't know if you've heard, but the whole town is talking about how you, you little rambunctious rascal," Hux scrunched his nose up as he smiled sarcastically. "Aren't really a bounty hunter and that you're just trying to make it through here peacefully with your lover! Isn't that just the juiciest little bit of gossip you ever did hear?"

Rey nearly choked on her shot, having tossed it back as he was talking, and she swallowed before coughing loudly and clearing her throat.

"That's just a rumor, they don't know the truth--"

"Mmn, they might when they find the body of the Sheriff that I ate just an hour ago." Hux smirked and Rey saw red.

"You..." Rey slowly turned to look at him with enraged eyes, venom filling her mouth as the anger only grew at the sight of his smug expression. "You did _what_?"

"Oh, don't just blame me," Hux picked his head up as he placed his hand over his heart, giving her a mock guilty look as he batted his eyelashes. "Kylo had some too! Oh, and so did Phasma, because you know why? We were hungry, and the Sheriff was talking about stringing _you_ up before us! We were doing you a favor, sweetheart! Aren't you going to say 'thank you'?"

"...Oh, my God," Rey inhaled sharply as she closed her eyes and she had to internally fight herself to not punch him as hard as she possibly could. "How has Kylo not killed you yet?"

"Oh, he's tried," Hux nodded as he took the bottle of whiskey from in front of her, taking a swig before looking back over at her. "Numerous times, actually. Since I've been in his pack, I'd say he's tried to kill me about...oh, I don't know...fifty times? I can't fight back, not because I'm scared to, obviously, but because he's Alpha. My instincts naturally tell me to cower before him when he's angry--"

"Are you sure it's your instincts and not because you're just an actual bitch of a man?" Rey glared at him and Hux whistled with a grin before taking another swig.

"Coming from the Christian girl who turned herself into a whore after her Father die--" He was cut off by Rey slamming her hand down on the countertop and he paused as he stared at her.

"...I was afraid of you at first, you know that?" Hux spoke quietly and Rey slowly furrowed her brows in confusion.

"I thought you were instantly going to kill me because of what I had done to your friend, how I had just discarded her corpse in that river, and I was afraid of you. But now? Now I can just see that you honestly don't have the guts to kill someone unless it's for self defense. Would you like to know why you can't, Rey?" Hux spoke in a soft tone and Rey only stared back at him.

"Because you're a good person," Hux looked away as his grip on the bottle tightened. "And, even though you hate me, you could never kill me. You just couldn't, Rey. It's not in your nature."

"I almost beat you to death--I _wanted_ to beat you to death, what are you--"

"You would've stopped before you could," Hux glanced at her and Rey tensed up visibly. "Because, once again, even though you hate me, it would positively haunt you that you took a life with your bare hands without it being for self defense."

...Was he right? Rey wasn't sure. She _had_ wanted to kill him in that moment, wanted to beat him to death with her very own fists, but was he right? Would it have haunted her? Or was he just trying to plant this seed of doubt in her mind to try and convince her that she couldn't hurt him just to protect himself?

"And that's why I'm going to enjoy watching you lose your mind after you turn." Hux murmured under his breath and something feral snapped within Rey as he uttered those words.

"You have just given me every single reason to kill you by saying that incredibly insensitive sentence," Rey spoke lowly and Hux's eyes flicked over to hers. "And, no, I wouldn't have been haunted by your death. In fact, I'm almost positive I would've _enjoyed_ it. I hate you, Hux. I have from the very beginning, and believe me, the moment Kylo gives me the opportunity to disembowel you, I will."

"...We'll see." Hux narrowed his eyes as he took yet another swig, but there was something in his eyes that she was almost positive she hadn't seen before.

Terror. Pure, unadulterated terror shined in his molten amber eyes, and she blinked a few times before inhaling sharply and getting off of her seat.

"I really don't suggest you finish that whole bottle because you and I both know you'll do something you'll regret--"

"Who are you, my mother?"

"If I was, you wouldn't be the way you were," Rey eyed him as she scowled. "You can trust me on that."

"...Fuck you." Hux hissed before taking a swig, and Rey rolled her eyes as she walked out of the saloon to see Phasma sitting on the inn porch steps.

Rey paused before heading over to her, a grin on her face as she plopped down right beside her. "Hey!"

"Hey, sunshine," Phasma smiled softly as she looked over at her. "How's your afternoon out on the town been?"

"Oh, you know," Rey sighed as she leaned back, shielding her eyes from the sun as she glanced up at the blue, cloudless sky. "It's been going."

"Yeah? Kylo is waiting up there for you," Phasma gently ruffled Rey's hair before standing up, offering her hand to her as she smiled down at her. "And I'm pretty sure we're leaving as soon as we're all packed, okay? We can't stay another night, as much as we all want to--"

"Because you killed and ate the Sheriff."

"Because we--goddammit," Phasma huffed as she pulled Rey up to her feet. "Hux told you, huh?"

"Mmn, no, I think you had a...semi-decent cause? Even though I'm still...highly against the idea of cannibalism..." Rey glanced away with an anxious look in her eyes and Phasma shrugged as she glanced away.

"...Kylo went berserk," Phasma whispered and Rey's eyes flicked back over to her. "He dragged him out of town when no one could see and...we followed him, obviously. I don't think I've ever seen him tear apart someone so brutally--"

"I don't want to know," Rey cut her off in a breathy tone as she closed her eyes, furrowing her brows as she clenched her dress in her hands. "I don't want to know."

"...He's panicking," Phasma cleared her throat as she stuck her thumbs in her belt loops. "I really suggest you go up there right now and don't leave his side. You didn't see him when he killed him, and believe me when I tell you that he's panicking."

"What is it with you wolves and being overly protective?" Rey sighed loudly as she rolled her eyes with a grin. 

"It's only Kylo who's protective over you--"

"No," Rey exhaled loudly with a smile as she pushed her hair back, looking up at Phasma as she did so. "No, he's not. You're just as protective."

Phasma stared down at her before slowly smiling. "Because you're one of us, Rey. You're worth protecting. You know I'd take a bullet for you any day."

"Don't get all sappy on me, Gwen. Also, you can't die. I'm pretty sure you're immortal." Rey laughed before going inside, ignoring the stares from judging individuals as she went up the stairs.

The minute she walked into the room, she saw Kylo hurriedly packing all of her things in a bag, and he turned his head towards her with wide eyes.

His hair was damp from the bath he had taken to most likely get all the blood off of him, but his eyes were all she could focus on.

They were filled with panic, with fear, and Rey took no hesitation whatsoever to walk over and put her hand on top of his.

"Hey," She spoke softly with a smile. "I'm here."

He stared at her as tears began to well in his eyes, Kylo laughing breathlessly as he nodded hurriedly. "Y-you're here,"

"And I'm not leaving,"

"And you're not leaving,"

"Ever."

"Ever." Kylo nodded again and Rey gave him a single nod before squeezing his hand tightly.

Sure, the bond may have accelerated her feelings towards him, and yes, she knew it wasn't normal to feel this strongly about someone in just two weeks, but she did.

She did, and she didn't care.

Because, at this point, he was all she had left, and the only thing keeping her sanity in tact.

But she really, really, _really_ should've told him about the nightmare.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry.
> 
> (You know that scene in Hoodwinked where the goat sings that song 'Be Prepared'? And then, towards the end, he's like 'I do not feel prepared'? Yeah. Yeah, that was me writing this chapter.)

If they hadn't been on the run from a psychotic resurrected werewolf, Rey would've wanted to stay here forever.

Two days after leaving the town and they had found an abandoned farm house of sorts, and Rey had instantly fallen in love with the white and red painted country house and red barn.

There were no animals, of course, besides their horses, but she had found a little attic space in the barn that you could get up to on a ladder with almost silk-like hay covering the wooden boards. 

It. Was. _Perfect_.

Three rooms in the two story house, a fireplace in the living room, a spacious kitchen, and an adorable little barn.

It was the third day on staying there, as she had convinced Kylo to at least let her stay there two more days after the first day, and she was currently in the bedroom they had chosen to stay in up on the second floor.

She slowly got out of bed, careful not to wake Kylo, before walking over to Kylo's twin onyx colored pistols that were resting on the dresser. 

She picked one up with the gentlest of care, opening the round to see the gleaming silver bullets laying within just waiting to be used. She took one out and held it between her thumb and index finger, her eyes narrowing in on Kylo's initials carved into the bullet.

The day after the lake incident, Phasma had asked her how she had known that silver bullets killed werewolves, and Rey had simply replied, " _Well, you use them, don't you? I put two and two together._ " 

Phasma had laughed and called her a clever girl, and then Rey learned that all of their bullets had their initials carved into them as a calling card of sorts.

" _It will only kill them if you aim for the heart or the head,_ " Phasma had told her. " _And you may be a quick shot, but werewolves in combat are fast, Rey. That's why you wouldn't win, no matter how good of a shot you are. You haven't seen our true potential, and I pray to God that you'll never have to._ "

Rey put the bullet back in the chamber before closing it and resting it back on the dresser, silently leaving the bedroom with the barn as her destination.

She was wearing a thin white dress she had found in one of the drawers at the inn, the dress bunched up in her hands as she ran towards the barn while giggling like an excited child would. Her hair shone brightly in the golden light of the early morning, dancing behind her in the wind as she ran even faster.

Freedom. 

We all get small snippets of freedom in our lifetime. And, oddly enough, most of these snippets are while we're running freely with only ourselves as company. 

It's a rush of exhilaration, of increased dopamine, and all you can do is laugh and smile as you think, " _Finally. Finally, finally, finally._ "

To feel the warmth of the sun on your skin, to feel the wind twirling around you, and to run until you can no longer run is just...freedom all on its own in its very own unique, special little way.

And she never wanted it to end.

She ran into the barn, only to look up to see Phasma in the attic space with her feet dangling over the edge and a bottle of whiskey in her hand. 

She grinned the moment she saw Rey, waving at her to come up. "Oi, sunshine!"

"Are you stealing my place of comfort?" Rey laughed as she climbed up the ladder, Phasma snorting and shaking her head before taking a swig from the bottle.

"No, not in the slightest," Phasma smiled as Rey settled down beside her, handing Rey the bottle and Rey took a small sip before handing it back to her.

"I wish we could stay here forever," Rey sighed as she rested her palms against the edge where no hay lay. "I adore this place. Don't you?"

"...You know we can't," Phasma's voice grew soft as she placed the bottle beside her and Rey glanced over at her as those happy feelings began to disintegrate into the crashing waves of reality. 

"I know," Rey whispered as she looked back forward, slowly kicking her feet back and forth as she frowned. "But I wish we could. I just--" Rey cut herself off as Phasma leaned over and sniffed her curiously.

"Um," Rey laughed nervously as she shifted. "What are you--"

"Is it your birthday today?" Phasma murmured and Rey blinked before furrowing her brows in confusion.

"I...don't know? I don't have a calendar--"

"Is July fifth your birthday?"

"Yeah--"

"Happy birthday!" Phasma chirped excitedly and Rey just stared at her with wide eyes before forcing a smile.

"We can smell people's age on their skin, and you, sunshine, smell a year older!"

"Because that's totally not weird at all!" Rey laughed loudly and Phasma shrugged with a grin.

"Hey, Rey," Phasma looked forward with a smile as she watched the yellowed grass rustle in the wind outside of the barn. 

"Yeah, Gwen?"

"Are you happy?"

Well, that certainly came out of nowhere. 

Rey blinked a few times before opening her mouth to speak, only for Phasma to speak again.

"I mean, are you happy with us? With Kylo? With your life overall since you left Niima Outpost?" She was still smiling, but Rey could see a hidden sadness behind it.

"...Yeah," Rey spoke softly as she shifted closer to her. "Yeah, of course. I'm right where I'm supposed to be, I know that now."

Phasma nodded slowly before putting her hand on top of Rey's, gently gripping her hand as she smiled sadly. "I don't want you to ever be forced to do something you don't want, Rey."

Rey stared at her before holding her hand back, and, in that moment, the world was still. 

"You're talking about him biting me when the full moon comes...aren't you?"

A wondrous thing, silence is. There are various different types of silence, and almost all of them eat away at you in some form or another. This certain type of silence, the one engulfing the barn, can knaw at you whole; suck your bones dry as it completely eats you up. 

"...Yeah," Phasma whispered as her grip tightened on Rey's hand. "Yeah, I am."

Oh, how the thunderous silence of deafening truth feasted upon Rey like devils starved.

"...I don't want to think about it right now--"

"Ignorance is bliss, isn't it?" Phasma chuckled as she let go of Rey's hand. "It's nice to just...ignore frightening things. I get it, and I'm not being sarcastic about that. I'm genuinely agreeing with my statement."

"Mhm," Rey responded in a high pitched tone before clearing her throat and shaking her head as she cleared the thought from her mind, clapping her hands together with a smile as she looked forward. "I'm starving! I made some bread and, since I know you can eat small amounts of human food at a time, I was wondering if you'd like some!"

Rey had learned about a week ago that werewolves could really only eat human flesh, and while that disturbed her to no end (as it would to most people), she had also learned that they could eat human food in small quantities if they so desired. While it didn't do much for hunger wise, it was still a thing that brought Rey great joy.

"Oh, yeah? I think I just might have a little nibble if you don't mind!" Phasma grinned and Rey squealed in delight as she nodded excitedly.

The walk back to the house was wonderful. The sun was bright, the sky was clear, and Phasma was telling one of her fantastic stories as Rey laughed along with her. 

"It's eight in the morning, why the hell are you so happy?" Hux sneered from the porch and Rey twirled around before running up the porch steps and shoving him to the side as Phasma laughed.

"It's eight in the morning, why are _you_ so grumpy?" Rey sang in a singsong tone as she disappeared inside, Hux rolling his eyes in annoyance as Phasma walked up to him.

"How can you stand to be around her for long periods of time? She makes me want to swallow the shell of a shotgun--"

"Oh, Armitage," Phasma sighed and Hux grimaced at his real name. "Lighten up, will you? Let her be happy."

"Why?" Hux asked bluntly and Phasma flicked his nose with a smirk.

"Because she deserves to be, you absolute dolt."

"What about me? Do I not deserve to be happy?"

"And what would make you happy, Hux?"

"...I don't know," Hux shrugged as he glanced away, a soft blush creeping up on his cheeks as he cleared his throat loudly. "Just--just going on a ride with you, I guess. Like we used to."

"Oh, a 'ride', huh?" Phasma deadpanned and Hux choked on air as he quickly shook his head.

"I-I was talking about riding on fucking horses! Christ!" Hux spat before storming inside and Phasma laughed loudly as she followed him, yanking his hat off of his head which caused him to shout and chase after her out through the back door and around the house into the fields in front.

Rey quietly giggled to herself in the kitchen as she watched Hux chase after Phasma outside through the window, only to giggle louder as she felt a pair of arms snake around her from behind.

"Mmn, mornin'," Kylo murmured sleepily as he rested his chin on her shoulder. "I woke up alone, you know I hate that."

" _You_ slept in," Rey took a bite of the bread in her hand before chewing and then swallowing. "We went to bed at eight last night, so I was up and early at five this morning."

"But I like wakin' you up," Kylo muttered against the skin of her neck before pressing a chaste kiss against her pulse point. "And I like our daily mornin' 'activity'."

"Goodness, let me eat first at least!" Rey laughed as she took another bite of her bread, and Kylo looked out the window to see Phasma pounce on top of Hux to which Hux shouted in surprise as they both fell to the ground.

"...Those two are more confusin' than a rattlesnake with its rattle broken," Kylo picked his head up before moving away from Rey and sitting down in one of the chairs at the kitchen table.

"And why's that?" Rey hummed as she sat herself down in his lap, Kylo wrapping his arms around her once again with his eyes still trained on the window.

"Oh, no reason," Kylo sighed with a smile as Rey nibbled on her bread.

"And why is a rattlesnake with its rattle broken 'confusing'? I swear, you make some of these sayings up," Rey laughed as she finished the slice of bread and Kylo hugged her tightly from behind as he growled happily.

"It's confusin' because how do you know it's creepin' up on you if you can't hear it's signature rattle?"

"You keep your eyes on the ground," Rey rolled her eyes with a smile as she rested her hands on his arms. "Obviously. You look where you step."

"That's probably why you've never been bitten by a snake, huh?"

"Yes, sir, that's exactly why!" Rey nodded triumphantly only to pause as she heard Phasma laugh loudly in delight from outside.

"Good God, you'd think it's late winter," Kylo groaned and Rey furrowed her brows in confusion at his words.

"Late winter...? What does late winter have to do with--"

"Heat." Kylo stated bluntly and Rey's cheeks burned red as she squeaked loudly as she instantly knew what he meant.

"O-oh--"

"It typically occurs between January and March," Kylo clicked his tongue as he leaned back against the chair, letting out a loud sigh as he looked away from the window. "And then pups are born in late-April or early-May. Although...pups are a rarity. Most of them, um...most of them don't..." Kylo trailed off and Rey's shoulders slumped down as she heard the utter sadness in his tone.

"We'll get there when we get there." Rey patted his arms affectionately and Kylo sucked in his breath as his arms tightened around her.

"You want to go upstairs?" Rey sighed softly and Kylo hummed quietly as he nosed her neck lovingly, a soft growl emitting from the back of his throat which she took as a ' _Yes, please._ '

"You smell different, you know that?" Kylo smiled as they walked up the stairs and Rey snorted as she shook her head.

"Apparently today is July fifth, according to Phasma, so I'm ninetee--"

"It's your birthday!" Kylo gasped excitedly as he scooped her up in his arms, Rey yelping as he ran up the rest of the stairs and down the hall to the bedroom they chose.

"K-Kylo! Put me--oof!" Rey gasped as she was practically slammed down onto the bed on her back, Kylo looming over her with a grin and she could practically see his tail wagging.

"Why didn't you tell me your birthday was today? That's, like, such a big celebra--"

"Why? It's just one year closer to death." Rey chuckled and Kylo frowned before shaking his head and grinning once more.

"I would've gotten you somethin'--"

"Oh, God, no, please," Rey groaned as she closed her eyes. "I don't even celebrate my birthday. It's a childish thing to celebrate. Can't we just act like it's a normal day?"

"Mmn...no," Kylo purred out as he pushed her dress up, Rey's eyes opening to see him smirking down at her. "No, I don't think so."

"...One present," Rey held up one finger and Kylo grinned once again as he knew what she was getting at it. "And this present stays in the bedroom. Then I want to take a small nap before we enjoy the rest of the day."

"That's fine with me." Kylo purred louder and Rey always found it fascinating how fast the both of them could undress.

She also found it fascinating how fast Kylo's eyes grew hungry by just the mere sight of her.

But, sometimes, like now, they could melt into each other without roughness and let everything else fade away.

She rolled her hips against his as she rode him, breathy exhales and gasps escaping her lips as she reveled in the feeling of him inside her. Her hands were planted on his chest, his hands gripping her ass as he stared up at her in awe, and the world was still for a second time that day.

"I love you," Kylo breathed out and Rey moaned quietly as she let her head fall back, her hair kissing her mid back as she picked up the pace of her hips.

"You already know I do." Rey whispered back and Kylo exhaled with a smile as he slid one hand up to the small of her back.

There are certain moments in time where you can let reality fade. You can let the clock stop, have the universe halt around you, and all that exists in that moment is you. 

You let everything else fade away, letting yourself slip into a realm that is neither here nor there. You close your eyes, breathe in the particles of your particular nothingness, and just float amongst the stars of your mind.

But, sometimes, you can share that moment with someone.

And she was there to share it with him in the melting ecstasy of each other. 

But it always ended up being rough in the end, and she fully blamed Kylo's instincts for that.

She was on her back as he pounded into her, his hands gripping her thighs tightly with his face buried in her neck, and all she could do was cry out his name as he let his instincts fully take over.

She felt his upper and lower canines scrape against her neck, and she quickly slapped him on the back with wide eyes to snap him out of it.

"I'm not--I'm not," Kylo groaned against her neck as he brought her legs up higher on his sides, Rey moaning shakily as she squeezed her eyes shut as she felt her orgasm nearing.

"D-don't you fucking-- _dare_!" Rey screamed as her body trembled as her orgasm swept over her, Kylo grunting as he came right along with her and pressed his hips tightly against hers.

"Jesus Christ," Rey whispered breathlessly as she opened her eyes as Kylo chortled softly, pulling out after a couple minutes and rolling onto his back and threw his arm over his eyes with a grin.

"I don't think your messiah was here for that," Kylo laughed and Rey huffed as she rolled over on her side to face him, playfully smacking his chest before closing her eyes.

"Or your God, but hey, if you're--" Kylo pulled his arm away to look at her only to see her fast asleep beside him.

"...Yeah," Kylo smiled as he gently brought her closer, her head resting against his chest as he closed his eyes. "Yeah."

\----------------------------------------------------------

When she awoke, she awoke alone and to the sound of gunshots happening right outside.

The first thing she felt was curiosity, but that curiosity quickly escalated into terror as she heard Kylo screaming.

"KYLO!" Rey screamed as she scrambled out of bed, hurriedly throwing on her dress after picking it up off the floor and grabbing the pistol he left behind on the dresser.

 _No, no, no_ , Rey ran down the stairs, nearly tripping and falling as she did, and she ran out the door only to be yanked down by Phasma behind a makeshift barricade of a desk before a bullet struck the door where her head had been.

"Are you out of your fucking mind?!" Phasma barked and Rey stared at her as her chest rose up and down frantically.

"I-I heard--"

"They found us," Phasma hissed out before looking over the desk to shoot one of Snoke's men who had gotten dangerously close, the man falling dead as Phasma crouched down again. "We stayed here for too long."

"F-fuck," Rey replied shakily before sucking in her breath and forcing herself to calm down. Now was definitely not the time to freak out and freeze up.

Before Phasma could even stop her, Rey looked over the desk and took a shot at a man who instantly fell dead.

"Fuck!" Phasma cursed loudly before erupting into loud laughter as Rey crouched back down, Rey laughing right along with her as pride swelled in her chest.

"Ha-ha, I can't believe I ever doubted you, sunshine!" Phasma continued to laugh loudly as she shot her pistol while standing up ever so slightly, Rey looking over at her with a smile before shooting off her pistol again.

"Kylo wasn't kidding, you really are a great--"

_Boom._

Rey froze as warmth splattered her face, her eyes slowly growing wide as Phasma collapsed beside her.

A ringing in her ears grew as she stared down at the still body of her friend, blood pooling around her head and staining her blonde hair as it leaked into the cracks of the dirty white wood porch floorboards.

"Gwen...?" Rey whispered as the ringing increased, all other sounds fading as Rey's pistol slipped from her hand and onto the porch. "G-Gwen?"

Rey leaned down as she reached her trembling hand out, tears springing to her eyes as she shakily touched Phasma's shoulder. "H-hey, Gwen...?"

All sound came rushing back as reality hit in, and Rey heard a shrill scream break the barrier of sound.

She realized that the scream was coming from her as reality hit twice in seconds.

Gwendolyn Phasma was dead.

Gwendolyn Phasma was _dead_.

Rey screamed again as she flipped Phasma onto her back, screaming even louder as she saw the left top part of her skull.

Her skull had been completely blown open. A gaping red hole with the skin peeled back from the blast, and smoke still rose from the wound in wisps equivalent to that of the bottom of the Grim Reaper's gown. Her left eye was covered by the ragged, flayed flesh that had been peeled back, or perhaps it had also been blown away by the shotgun. 

Blood trickled from her nose, her once lively amber eyes wide and lifeless, and her lips were parted ever so slightly and stained with the blood that was streaming down her face from the gunshot wound. Her entire face was beginning to become stained red, and all Rey wanted to do was wipe it all away as if it never happened.

Rey sobbed uncontrollably as she touched Phasma's cheek with a trembling hand, her eyes wide and frantic with disbelief.

"No, no, no," Rey choked out as gunshots continued all around her, and she could distinctly hear Kylo screaming her name. "No, no, Gwen--G-Gwen, no! NO? NO?! GWEN?! GWEN?!"

"G-GWEN!" Rey screamed again as she squeezed her eyes shut, her entire body shaking violently as she let out scream after scream while throwing her head back. " _GWEN_!"

She could still hear Kylo screaming her name in the distance, the sound of gunfire still heavy in the air as Hux and Kylo shot the remainder of Snoke's men.

Then, it was silent, and the world was still for the third time that day.

"Why the fuck are you making all of this--" Hux stopped dead in his tracks as he saw Phasma's corpse, his face falling as he stumbled backwards and fell on his ass. A breathy exhale escaped his lips as tears welled in his eyes, his shoulders slumping down as a look of utter heartbreak washed over his face.

"H-hey...I don't--I don't..." Hux choked out and Rey sobbed as she leaned down, pressing her cheek against Phasma's chest as she desperately clung to her shirt.

"This...isn't real..." Hux stifled a sob as Kylo slowly walked over and he nearly collapsed to the ground as he saw the scene before him.

"This...isn't...real..." Hux whimpered as a silence grew over them.

A fourth stillness, and this one ate at all of them until nothing but bone was left.

"...Right, G-Gwen...? Gwen...?"


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote out Phasma's death scene about...two months ago? It was supposed to be super dramatic, where she had this huge speech to Rey, but I decided that a sudden death would make much more sense.
> 
> Remember when I said this fic would get messy? This is it. This is where the fic gets messy. Death can happen in the blink of an eye, can happen so suddenly, and it can change the very way you view things. It can change a lighthearted story to one of deafening darkness, and, from here on out, there will be a darker undertone than there already was (although, there will be comedic relief, because humor is how I cope).
> 
> ...I'm still crying over Phasma, though.
> 
> Also, was it really a surprise that Hux had feelings for Phasma?

There is sadness in loss.

Well, yes, it's obvious that there's sadness in loss, but you don't truly know of it until you experience it first hand.

You think of loss and you say, " _Yes, of course, loss is the equivalence of sadness, of mourning and of emptiness._ "

But you truly do not know the definition behind it until you experience it for yourself.

You do not feel its crushing weight, its painful claws, until you hear or see it.

And Rey had both heard and seen it all at once.

She was still screaming at the top of her lungs with her hands gripping Phasma's shirt, and all Kylo could do was watch in horror as his Luna, his very reason to exist at this point, was clinging to the corpse of what once was his Beta and very close friend.

He hesitated for a moment before walking over, crouching down beside Rey and placing her hand on her back only for her to jerk away from him, and he hated what he was about to do.

Kylo practically had to tear Rey away from Phasma, and he desperately tried not to cry at Rey's heartbroken screams of agony as he dragged her into the house.

Her screams mixed with Hux having to pick himself up and stumble towards Phasma, falling to his knees beside her and picking her up in his arm before cradling her close in his arms like one would with a doll was...horrifying.

Hux's eyes met Kylo's, and Kylo choked on the stale air of misery as he saw the pain in the Delta's eyes.

Agony. Heartbreak. Sorrow. Misery. Rage. All mixed together in melted amber, all concocted as one large shattered emotion shining in his eyes, and Kylo fell to his knees with Rey still in his arms.

Rey continued to scream, thrashing in his arms as she howled up to the ceiling, and, in that moment, the world had died.

Nothing existed, not anymore, and Hux slowly looked down at Phasma before he finally let go and began to cry.

"IT'S HER FUCKING FAULT!" Hux screamed and Kylo shook his head hurriedly as Rey threw her head back, her screams neverending as tears poured from her eyes like a broken faucet.

Kylo quickly shook his head with wide eyes as he held Rey tighter. "N-no--no, no, don't you dare go and start blamin' her--"

"SHE WANTED TO STAY! S-SHE'D STILL BE ALIVE, SHE'D--G-God-fucking-dammit...f-fucking...oh, God...!" Hux choked loudly as he cradled Phasma even closer, his hand cupping the back of her head to press her broken face into his chest.

"K-Ky--Kylo--" Rey hiccuped loudly, her words barely coherent, and Kylo gently hushed her as he squeezed his eyes shut.

Until this moment, they truly didn't realize how much danger they were in.

They thought they were outrunning him, that they were winning and they'd make it to the docks of New York before Snoke and his men could even step in the same vicinity as them, but everything can change in a matter of seconds.

It's funny how fate can do that. One moment, everything is fine, but then the next moment...everything goes straight to hell and there's absolutely nothing you can do about it because it was already written in the cards of life. 

One moment everything is joy and laughter, jokes and smiles, but the next is death and loss. The next is tears and blood.

And, once again, there's nothing you can do about it. Nothing at all.

\------------------------------------------------------------

Rey was watching Hux from the porch with a blanket wrapped around her shoulders, Kylo sitting on the steps with his eyes downcast. 

An hour earlier, an hour after unmovable grief, they had buried her out in the field. It wasn't the ideal gravesite, not in the slightest, but it had to make do.

And Rey _hated_ that.

Phasma deserved so much better than a field; she deserved a headstone and flowers and a coffin. She deserved the goddamn world, and Rey _hated_ that she couldn't have taken her place instead.

"I'm going to talk to him," Rey spoke hoarsely (as she had lost her voice due to screaming and sobbing for an hour straight), only for Kylo to gently grab her ankle as he shook his head.

"Don't, Rey," Kylo spoke in a whisper that only corpses knew of; dead silent. "Let him grieve. Stay here."

Rey was still for a moment before sitting down beside him, a small whimper escaping her lips as fresh tears welled in her eyes. "It should've been me--"

"Don't you fuckin' dare go and say that," Kylo ground out lowly before inhaling sharply and closing his eyes as his brows furrowed in emotional pain. "D-don't you fuckin' _dare_ go and say that, Rey."

"B-but--"

"I can't _fuckin'_ lose you--"

"S-she didn't deserve to die!" Rey shot out before choking out a sob and burying her face in her hands, Kylo opening his eyes to look over at her with a pained expression as she did so.

"No," Kylo spoke softly as he pulled her hands away from her face. "No, she didn't. She didn't deserve this fate."

"Kylo," Rey whined loudly as she bounced up and down frantically, her body trembling once again as the metaphorical rains of devastation began to pelt her skin all over again. "K-Kylo!"

"I know it hurts, I know," Kylo pulled her close to which she instantly got in his lap, hugging his neck tightly as she buried her face in his shoulder. He placed his hands on her back, leaning his head against hers as he watched Hux curl up in a ball beside the grave as the redhead let out a lonely howl.

How could this have happened? How could Phasma, of all people, die in split second?

"...I'm ready," Rey suddenly spoke and Kylo pulled back to look at her.

"For what, darlin'?"

"To turn." Her expression was one of grit, and Kylo's eyes slowly widened as he realized that the need for vengeance was growing its seed deep within her.

"You--Luna--"

"When the full moon comes, I want you to do it immediately," Rey glared at him as she spat out her words. "I'm ready. I don't care about the pain."

"...I had hoped you would want to be bitten out of love," Kylo whispered and Rey looked away with hate filled, teary eyes. "Not for vengeance."

"Can it not be both?" She asked and Kylo paused before slowly nodding. He understood. Of course he, of all people, would understand. 

"As long as there's still some love--"

"You know I love you!" Rey looked back at him and Kylo sighed as he glanced down.

"...I'm scared, Rey," Kylo exhaled with a sad smile and Rey's face softened. "I'm scared of what's comin' next. They--they shot her down like a dog in the street, like she was nothin', and--"

"And you're scared they'll kill me just as easily." Rey finished his sentence for him and he looked up at her with saddened eyes as he bit back a loud whimper.

"I won't let--" Rey cut herself off as Hux walked up the stairs past them, his eyes flicking towards Rey before he disappeared inside.

Rey instantly got up from Kylo's lap, Kylo not even having a second to stop her before she disappeared inside as well.

She quickly walked over to Hux who was grabbing a bottle of whiskey from the kitchen, and before she could even speak, he turned towards her with a glare.

"Fuck you," Hux hissed out and Rey jerked back with a pained expression as fresh tears welled in her eyes. "Fuck you for even existing."

"I-I'm sorry--"

"I don't even know why she adored you," Hux scoffed as he took a swig, his eyes burning into Rey's as he did so. "But she did. You were her goddamn sunshine, one of the reasons she woke up in the morning, and for what? You're just here because Kylo likes fucking your tight cunt."

Rey nearly fell to the floor at his words, her lower lip trembling as she let out a small whimper.

"Do you honestly think I'm going to grieve with you, Rey? I knew her for three years. Three years. And you only knew her for what, two and a half weeks? Maybe three? I don't exactly keep up with time."

"S-she was like my mom--"

"Your mom?" Hux cut her off before laughing loudly and taking another large swig. "I _loved_ her. Do you know how many nights I wish I was imprinted to her? How I wished she would tell me she loved me back without me even uttering the words to her?"

It suddenly all made sense. Why Hux was so much more gentle around Phasma, why he laughed more with her, why he never talked to her badly. It was because he had been in love with her, and Rey choked out a broken sob as she leaned against the table for support.

"It should've been you," Hux spat and Rey then began to cry as she let reality set in all over again. "Because at least she would've still been--"

Hux was cut off by Kylo slamming him into the kitchen counter, the redhead gasping loudly as the bottle shattered on the floor before growling loudly in anger.

"Tell her it should've been her again," Kylo snarled as he pressed Hux's head harder against the counter. "Tell her why she should be dead. Come on, Hux. Make my fuckin' day even worse."

"S-she should be the one without half a face--"

_Crack._

Kylo slammed Hux's face into the counter face first, Rey screaming as she gripped at her hair as Hux's nose spurted with blood.

But then Hux began to cry.

It was an odd thing, seeing Hux cry.

It was as if a bitter stone statue was shedding tears of concrete, of tears long forgotten, and both Rey and Kylo paused as Hux let out a lonely sob.

"W-we laid together once," Hux choked out in a trembling voice as he squeezed his eyes shut. "Her f-first heat. I had already been a wolf for two years, and I tried to tell her I wasn't the one she should go to, but she--she told me she wanted it to be me."

"H-Hux," Rey whined and Hux sobbed harder as he clutched the kitchen counter as Kylo let go of him. 

"She--she was everything I ever wanted in a woman, and--and it broke my heart when she didn't become pregnant. I wanted pups, y-you know? With her. Just...with her. And I wanted to try again, but she never made another move. My love was...unrequited," And then he fell to the floor, screaming and crying like a man who had lost the very will to exist.

"And now she's gone...and I can't even tell her," Hux wailed and Rey fell to the ground, crawling over to him and touching his cheek with the uttermost sincerity. 

"I-I can't even tell her I loved her!"

"How did I not know about this?" Kylo breathed out shakily and Hux looked up at him with broken eyes.

"Because she didn't want you to know."

\------------------------------------------------------------

Hux sat in the living room an hour later as he ignored the sound of Kylo comforting Rey, quickly letting himself get lost in his thoughts.

**Three years earlier. February of 1873.**

_Hux made his sleeping quarters far away from Kylo in the forest they were residing in, huffing under his breath as he finished pitching up his tent. It wasn't the ideal pitching, of course, but he thought he did a pretty good job. He had been doing this for a year, and while he wasn't the greatest, he thought his job wasn't too shabby._

_"Oh, wow, look at that," Phasma scoffed from behind him, Hux turning his head to look at her with wide eyes. "It's only slightly deflated!"_

_"I fucking tried, okay?" Hux grimaced only for Phasma to laugh loudly as she clapped him on the back._

_"Yeah, you did! I'm genuinely congratulating you, I'm not--I'm not being facetious," Phasma's expression softened as she let her hand slide down to the small of his back. "Do you think I'm being facetious...?"_

_"I don't know," Hux rolled his eyes as he pulled her hand off of him. "Ren seems to be 'facetious' almost all of the time towards me."_

_"Kylo's an arse," Phasma smiled, and Hux tensed up at it. It was one of the most beautiful smiles he'd ever seen. "But what's new, right?"_

_"Um...yeah," Hux cleared his throat as he turned her head away from her, opening his tent flap as he glanced downwards. "Yeah."_

_He didn't expect her to follow him inside of his tent, but she did, and he watched her look over all of his things._

_"Oh, you have cards!" Phasma gasped excitedly as she snatched up the deck of playing cards on the end of his cot, looking through them before smirking. "If you guess what card I'm looking at, you'll get a surprise."_

_"A surprise?" Hux scoffed and Phasma bit her lower lip with a smile as she continued to stare at him._

_Hux sighed before taking a step towards her, humming as he looked up towards the ceiling of the tent. "Um...Queen of spades?"_

_"Oh, so close!" Phasma sucked in her breath as she flipped the card around to reveal the King of spades._

_"Damn," Hux snapped as he sighed dramatically. "No surprise for me then, huh? What a shame."_

_Phasma stared at him for a moment before slowly letting the playing cards fall from her hands, the cards splaying out on the floor as she caressed his cheek before leaning down and kissing him._

_Hux instantly pulled back with wide eyes and Phasma paused with eyes just as wide._

_"I'm not--I'm not the Alpha--"_

_"I'm not interested in the Alpha," Phasma breathed out with a smile equivalent to that of the sun and Hux furrowed his brows as he stayed still._

_"But...you're in heat. You go to the Alpha for that, not to the Delta."_

_"Once again, Hux, I'm not interested in the Alpha," Phasma laughed as she dragged her hand down his chest in a teasingly slow manner. "I'm interested in you."_

_Hux stared up for a moment before kissing her fiercely, Phasma grabbing his face and kissing him back with the same amount of ferocity._

_She took all control, leading him over to the bed and straddling him before leaning down once more and hungrily ravaging her mouth with his._

_"A-are you sure?" Hux breathed shakily into the kiss and Phasma pulled back to take her shirt off._

_"Would I really be doing this if I wasn't sure?" Phasma chortled breathlessly and Hux stared up at her with his lips parted as he stayed silent._

_"...You could become pregnant--"_

_"We'll get there when we get there."_

_Minutes later and he was inside of her with her on her back, their lips barely leaving each other for a moment as he thrusted inside of her slowly but he picked up his pace each moment._

_"Anyone ever tell you that you look like an angel with your hair splayed out like that?" Hux smiled and Phasma chuckled breathlessly before arching her back up into him._

_"No. Only you."_

_"Well, you look like an angel with your hair splayed out like that."_

_"Thank you," Phasma smiled before their lips met again, Hux moving her legs up higher on his sides as he sped up his thrusts._

_Phasma cried out and Hux yanked his head back as he stilled his hips. "Gwen, are you--"_

_"I'm fine! Jesus Christ, I'm fine!" Phasma barked and Hux nodded hurriedly as he continued, Phasma clinging to him and burying her face in his shoulder as she cried out repeatedly._

_He wanted to say 'I adore you. I adore every single thing you do, I have since you joined the pack,' but he couldn't. Not in this moment of heated passion, not in this moment of her crying out his name, and, so, instead he said this: "You're everything."_

As he snapped back to reality, Hux hung his head and cried.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *familiar faces have entered the chat*
> 
> (I can't stop writing. I have no idea where this sudden burst of creativity came from, but it's here, and I'm not complaining.)
> 
> (Also, I promise this all ties in together. It'll be explained further in detail in the next chapter.)
> 
> (Edit: I'm going to be taking a few days off, but I'll be back to uploading probably around Thursday or Friday!)

"God, I just--" Rey sucked in her breath as she paced back and forth in the bedroom as Kylo watched her from where he sat on the bed.

"I just--I just want to help him--"

"You can't," Kylo muttered and Rey sighed loudly as she halted in her steps and closed her eyes.

"You don't understand what loss feels like to us, Rey,"

"Well, then help me understand," Rey opened her eyes to look over at him, her eyes still puffy and red from crying. "Are your emotions on a higher level than humans, is that it? Because that would actually make an incredible amount of sense for most of the things you do."

"...I'm goin' to pretend that doesn't offend me--"

"Did I say anything bad? Must you assume I meant ill?" Rey arched a brow and Kylo shook his head as he patted the spot beside him. She instantly walked over, sitting down and resting her head against his shoulder as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders comfortingly.

"We do feel emotions on a much stronger level, yeah. So, and don't take this the wrong way, Hux is about a hundred times more heartbroken than you." Kylo sucked in his breath and Rey glanced down as she frowned.

"I can't...even began to imagine what that feels like," She whispered and Kylo inhaled slowly as he looked down.

Of course, he was heartbroken as well. He had lost a pack member, a friend, and he knew that from here on out, nothing would be the same. It was as if a window had shattered and had impaled all three of them in the heart with jagged shards. 

"I'm, um," Rey sniffled as she wiped her eyes, not even noticing that she was silently crying until she felt the wetness on her cheeks beneath her fingertips. "I'm going to go to the barn really fast, okay? And then--and then we'll leave. I know we can't stay here any longer, it's too much of a risk."

"...I'm goin' to have to go tell Hux," Kylo spoke quietly, in a tone similar to that of the whispering dead, and Rey stood up as she wiped her eyes again.

"Yeah. Yeah." Rey nodded before exiting the bedroom, walking down the hall as she hugged herself tightly.

Ghosts don't necessarily have to be the haunting spectral forms you hear tall tales of.

A ghost could be a memory, an object someone left behind, or someone's very name.

A ghost can be anything as long as it haunts you.

And, right now, Rey was being haunted by her very own mind.

She was used to her mind haunting her, used to seeing flashes of the Reverend dying in her arms. But this? This hurt just as much.

Rey felt as if she had lost a mother, and she nearly broke down as she made the realization that she had lost both her father figure and mother figure in a single lifetime.

It _hurt_. It hurt like hell, and she knew the pain wouldn't stop. The pain of loss never stops, it just slowly gets numb over time.

As she got to the bottom of the stairs, she saw Hux sitting on the couch with his head in his hands and his body trembling as if he was freezing. 

Rey paused for a moment before walking over to him, grabbing the blanket on the back of the couch and placing it over his shoulders as she smiled sadly.

Hux looked over and up at her with broken eyes as he pulled the blanket closer around him. "...Thank you."

"Any time." Rey rubbed his back for a brief moment before turning to go towards the door but he suddenly grabbed her wrist.

"I'm s-sorry," Hux's voice cracked as he looked at her with teary eyes. "I didn't--I didn't mean it. Saying that it should've been you."

Rey exhaled with a smile as she nodded. "I feel like you apologizing is like seeing a unicorn, so I feel honored--"

"Oh, shut up," Hux laughed weakly as he let go of her wrist. "You ruined it."

Rey simply only smiled before going towards the door, walking out of the house and towards the barn as she let the tall grass rub against her skin like soft, dull razor blades. There was a sick part of her mind that wished they were sharper, that they would prick her skin, but she knew that was only because she wanted to feel something other than this emotional agony that swam inside of her like a rabid, starving piranha.

She walked into the barn, beginning to go towards the ladder before suddenly feeling someone grab her from behind and clamp a gloved hand over her mouth.

She instantly bit down as hard as she could on their hand, and Rey paused as she recognized the owner of the forced quiet toned curse that flew from their lips.

"Shit, wild thing, you really--aw, fuck," Poe hissed quietly and Rey whirled around before nearly collapsing to the ground. 

His eyes were _gold_. No longer were they the dark brown that reminded her of bark on a tree, but a blazing gold that shined in the sunlight pouring in through the open barn windows.

"You really have a bite, huh? Fucking _Christ_ ," Poe shook his hand frantically as to try and stop the pain and Rey stared at him with wide eyes before slowly sitting down on the ground with a shattered look in her eyes.

"Hey," Poe frowned as he stopped shaking his hand. "Hey, you aren't glad to see me...? I was worried sick about you,"

"I--where's Finn...?" _Please tell me he isn't dead. Please tell me Snoke didn't murder him. Please. It had to be Snoke. It had to be. But...then...why didn't he attack Kylo when he was in Niima?_

Poe inhaled quietly before crouching down in front of her, pushing her hair back as he gave her a small smile. "He's waiting about a mile from here. But we need to--"

"How did you turn?" Rey cut him off and Poe's smile fell as his hand fell from her hair.

"A giant wolf attacked Finn and I the night of the full moon. It, um..." Poe glanced away as pain etched itself on his face. "It tried to kill us. Basically tore into my shoulder, and it tore into Finn's side and basically tried to bite him in half. We lay in the canyons with this raging fever as well as our wounds for about ten hours, and we--we were pretty sure we were going to die,"

"But you didn't," Rey's eyes widened all over again and Poe nodded.

"Yeah, we didn't, and it turns out that wolf was a man--well, I wouldn't exactly call him a man--"

"The wolves Kylo and Phasma smelled," Rey's eyes lit up in realization as she gasped. "They were you and Finn! You guys had just turned, of course your scent was strong! They thought it was other wolves who had come because they smelled them, but no, it was you guys!"

"I guess so, yeah," Poe smiled before standing up and offering her his hand. "But we gotta go, wild thing. This is a rescue mission. There are other werewolves waiting nearby just waiting to attack again when you guys are asleep, and we would know because we were forcefully grouped up with them by Snoke. The ones that came to attack you were only a handful, and only one came back. He didn't even fight, he just watched from a way aways so he could report back to us."

"...I don't need to be saved, though?" Rey tilted her head to the side with a confused expression and Poe's hand dropped as he furrowed his brows before scoffing loudly.

"You're joking, right? Like, you're actually joking? Rey, Kylo Ren, the fucking outlaw, basically kidnapped you--"

"In the beginning, sure," Rey nodded quickly. "But I'm here of my own free will now. I'm bonded to him, he imprinted on me. We're basically mates."

The barn was painfully silent for a few moments before Poe's face fell.

"Oh...my God, he's basically coaxed you in some sick, mind twisting way into loving him, hasn't he?" Poe's face twisted in horror and Rey jerked back as if she'd been slapped.

"Excuse me?!" Rey bolted up, pushing him backwards with a raging fire in her eyes as she growled lowly. She may not be a wolf yet, but her growl was still menacing. After being with Kylo for nearly three weeks, she had perfected it down to the very core.

"You're actually telling me that you're in love with him?! Jesus Christ, how did he get in your head that fast--"

"I _do_ love him--"

"You can't fall in love with someone in three weeks--"

"The bond escalates it!" Rey snapped only for the barn doors to swing open to reveal a very, very, _very_ enraged Kylo.

"You," Kylo's eyes flashed angrily and Poe turned around to glare at him.

" _You._ " Poe growled loudly and Rey instantly scrambled over and in-between them to stop them from hurdling at each other to rip each other's throats out.

"Luna," Kylo spoke lowly in warning and Rey rolled her eyes as she crossed her arms. "Move."

"No." Rey responded flatly and Poe attempted to move to the side only to stop as she glowered in his direction.

"I see Snoke got to you," Kylo looked Poe up and down before hissing lowly as he narrowed his eyes, instantly recognizing Poe's rank by his scent. " _Delta._ "

"And I see you've completely forced my friend into being in love with you somehow," Poe snarled and Kylo snarled right back at that. " _Alpha._ "

"Jesus, stop! Kylo didn't do anything to me that I didn't want!" Rey huffed in annoyance and Poe growled softly as he tore his eyes away from Kylo's. 

"And I really don't appreciate you thinkin' that I would do anything to her that she wouldn't want," Kylo took a step forward only for Rey to put her hand on his chest to stop him but he continued talking anyways, "So you best keep your trap shut or else you might be without your lower jaw in a second."

"Oh, is that supposed to scare me? You're not my Alpha, you have absolutely zero control over me." Poe spat and Rey clenched her jaw as she feared that this would escalate all too soon.

"Oh, I know your Alpha," Kylo chuckled bitterly. "I know your Alpha all too well."

"Yeah? Maybe I should just drag you back to him right now--"

"He's here?" Fear entered Kylo's eyes and Poe grinned like a feral cat at the outlaw's reaction.

"No, Ren, he's not here. He's miles away, but I can take you to him."

"I will _murder_ you--"

"Stop it! Stop, stop, stop! Stop!" Rey cried out and the air grew still as she bit back a scream of anguish. "We're on the same fucking side, okay?!"

"No," Poe fought the urge to crouch down as Kylo glared at him. An Alpha is still an Alpha, and Poe knew that he probably wouldn't survive the first ten seconds in the fight if it occurred. "I'm on my own side. We're running away as soon as I take you back, and then we're going south. I would only take Ren to Snoke to buy our freedom so we wouldn't have to run."

"Ah, so you're a coward and an idiot!" Kylo barked out a laugh and Poe narrowed his eyes as he growled yet again.

"Rey, let's go--"

"Luna, move--"

"ENOUGH!" Rey screamed at the top of her lungs and Poe nearly fell, his eyes wide as he stared at her in shock. Kylo didn't look phased, though. He was more than used to her yelling at this point.

"Poe, I'm not leaving with you. Kylo, you cannot kill him. May I please make a suggestion?" Rey sighed and both Poe and Kylo murmured indistinctly in agreement.

"Okay, great," Rey sighed again before taking her hand away from Kylo and clasping her hands together. "I suggest we all leave together."

"...Yeah, no," Poe deadpanned and Kylo rolled his eyes.

"As if I'd want you to leave with _my_ pack--"

"You're short one now, though, aren't y--"

Poe was cut off by Rey slapping him as hard as she could, her face twisted in both hurt and rage as tears sprang to her eyes. 

Poe stumbled back and placed his hand on his cheek as he stared at her with slightly furrowed brows. 

"You don't get to say anything about Gwendolyn Phasma," Rey whispered shakily as a couple tears slid down her cheeks. " _Ever._ "

Poe stayed silent before looking away with a guilty expression, not noticing the absolute murderous rage shining in Kylo's eyes as he did so. Poe dug into the ground with the toe of his boot after a moment, sighing quietly as he took his hand away from his still stinging cheek.

"I'm sorry," Poe whispered as he looked down. "I heard about what happened, I didn't...I didn't think you cared about her,"

"I-I cared about her more than anything!" Rey shot out before letting out a small hiccup, wiping her eyes frantically as she tried to get her breathing under control. "She was like my mother, and Snoke basically killed her himself. Just like he did with Kylo's parents, and just like he tried to do with you and Finn."

"Finn? The other one from Niima is here, too? Why am I not suprised?" Kylo groaned but instantly stopped as Rey looked back at him with teary eyes and a trembling lower lip. His face softened and he held his arms out, Rey turning around and walking over to him before clinging to him tightly as he wrapped his arms just around her as tightly.

Poe watching curiously before shaking his head and putting his hands in his back pockets. "Fine. I'll go with you. I probably have information about Snoke you guys need, anyway."

Kylo's arms instantly tightened around Rey and Rey made a small choking noise in retaliation. 

"And who the fuck says you can go with us, Delta?"

"I-I do," Rey tapped his back and Kylo hesitated before letting her go. Rey sucked in her breath before smoothing her dress down, looking towards Poe as she gave him a single nod. "We can trust him."

"You can't ever trust Snoke's men--"

"I am not one of his men," Poe rolled his eyes as he teetered back and forth on his heels. "I was roped into this, and so was Finn. We've wanted to run since he took us and introduced us to all of these godawful men that were staying in some ghost town numerous miles away from Niima--"

"The first ghost town we went through," Rey breathed out as she clutched her chest. "Yeah. Yeah, Phasma found a scrap of Snoke's clothing there."

"He'd been staying there for a month or so, and he acquired all these men by...Jesus, I don't even know how. There was at least twenty-one."

"Then there's only been five new since I 'killed' him, including you and...Finn," Kylo glanced away as he fought the urge to grit his teeth. "And we killed about eight earlier so that leaves thirteen. He basically collects people he thinks would serve him well."

"You obviously turned out rogue," Poe smirked and Kylo slowly grinned.

"Oh, you have no idea. I 'killed' him."

"He didn't stay dead."

"Yeah, no shit." Kylo grimaced and Rey's eyes glanced upwards to the attic space. She narrowed her eyes as she swore she saw something hiding beneath the hay.

"...We should leave now," Rey inhaled shakily as fear set in. She was just now remembering that Poe had told her Snoke's men were waiting to attack again.

"I need to go get Fi--"

"No need!" Finn poked his head up from underneath the hay of the attic space and Rey screamed before freezing and then laughing. Finn grinned and Rey laughed again as fresh tears, although of joy this time, sprang to her eyes.

"You've been there the whole time? Excuse me, what the fuck? How did you even get up there?" Poe turned around as he threw his hands up and Finn laughed as he shrugged cheerily. 

"I snuck in here about fifteen minutes ago, I beat you here. And I'm pretty sure the hay was masking my scent." Finn grinned and Poe put his hands on the ladder as he grinned back.

"These are the people you chose to be your friends? An idiotic Delta and a moron Beta?" Kylo murmured and Rey playfully smacked his arm.

"Yeah, and you took her from us," Finn jumped down before brushing the hay off of him, Poe walking over and helping him brush all of it off. "But we won't talk about that right now because we do need to go. Rey's right, just like always."

"...I wanted to kill the both of you the first time I saw you, and believe me, I still do," Kylo inhaled sharply before glancing towards Rey. "You're so fuckin' lucky she likes y'all."

"You, my toxic, toxic friend, are lassoed," Finn chuckled and Poe snickered loudly as he brushed off the rest of the hay off of Finn's head. "With a capital 'L'."

Poe imitated the motion of throwing a lasso towards Kylo and Kylo pressed his lips together tightly as he looked up at the ceiling. He wasn't sure if he could get through another five minutes without killing them.

But Rey was happy, he could see that. 

She had run over to them, talking to them excitedly as she told them everywhere she had been and all the things she had seen, and they were listening to her with the biggest smiles on their faces. She was complimenting their eyes, telling them how well gold fit them, and Kylo felt something inside of him soften at her so happy to see her friends alive.

It was heartwarming, and it was a warmth she severely needed after today, and he knew that. He knew that.

"Luna," Kylo spoke softly and Rey looked over at him with expectant eyes. "Come on, let's go get your stuff."

"Did you tell Hux?" 

And that warmth left as soon as it came; stolen away by the icy grasp of bitter reality.

"He--yeah," Kylo looked away with a pained expression. "Yeah, I did. He, um...he's with her. He's saying goodbye."

"Oh," Rey's face slowly fell as her shoulders slumped down, and Poe and Finn glanced at each other. 

"I already paid my respects, but you...you should go, darlin'. Go say goodbye."

Rey looked back towards Finn and Poe and they nodded solemnly before she turned and left the barn.

She saw Hux in the field at the earthy mound Phasma was buried beneath, and she walked over to him before sitting down beside him.

"Your nose looks better," Rey gave him a halfhearted smile and Hux hung his head as he exhaled loudly.

"It's quiet," Hux breathed out as he closed his eyes.

"Is that bad?" Rey asked and Hux scoffed with a smile as he reopened his eyes.

"No," Hux smiled wider as he fought back tears. "No, it's not. Gwen loved silence from time to time, and I'm pretty sure she's happy that she was buried in the place you love so much. Like I said, you were her sunshine. She adored you."

"She cared about you, too," Rey put her hand over his and Hux looked over at her with tired eyes. "You know that, right? She loved you in her own way."

"And what a way it was." Hux smiled and Rey smiled back before looking down at the grave.

"We're not seriously leaving with your so called friends, are we?" Hux sighed and Rey blinked before looking over at him.

"How did you--"

"Did you seriously forget that we can hear everything if we listen closely?" Hux smirked as he looked over at her before looking down at the grave. "Kylo and I knew your friend was in there the moment he started mouthing off Kylo. Are you honestly surprised?"

"Actually," Rey laughed breathlessly as she looked up at the bright blue sky. "I'm not surprised in the slightest."

"And you actually think we can trust them?"

"I do."

"Well, shit," Hux rolled his shoulders before briefly touching the grave and then standing up. "I can't say no because I know she'd tell me to shut up."

"She would, wouldn't she?" Rey touched the grave as Hux walked away. She inhaled slowly, smiling a sad smile as she let herself tear up.

"Goodbye, Gwendolyn Phasma. May you rest in peace."


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Super short chapter, I know, and I sincerely apologize for that.
> 
> I took a small break to work on my other fic, but I'll be back to updating this one regularly, so don't worry! 
> 
> I really hope y'all are enjoying the fic, and I'm so sorry for killing Phasma. In a sense, and it hurts to say this, it had to happen. It was a major turning point in the story, and it really sets the beginning of the end in motion.

It was strange being on the run without Phasma, but, of course, that was a given.

It was also strange for Rey to ride Phasma's white mare and not seated behind the blonde.

Poe and Finn were galloping next to her on the chestnut mare she had taken from the last town, and she kept looking over at them. Each time she did, her smile would grow wider, and soon, she was laughing.

She thought it okay to laugh. It was okay to laugh, actually, as there is no wrong way to mourn and you don't need to be sad all the time. Her friends were back, they were here, and she could smile. She could laugh.

Even if on the inside she was still being crushed by the absence of Phasma, she was allowed to be happy for this moment.

They had been riding for hours, as Poe had assured them that Snoke's men wouldn't move from where they were near the farm house because they had been told to stay there until nightfall, and Rey hoped that they were winning again.

That's what they needed. They needed to win, to escape, and Rey leaned forward as the white mare galloped faster to the front where Kylo was.

Kylo looked over at her and Rey looked over at him as she laughed with tears mixed of both sadness and joy in her eyes. His eyes widened before they softened, a small smile creeping up on his lips as he gave her a nod.

Rey nodded back before passing him, throwing her arms up as she let out a happy shout as the wind rushed against her like an opposing opponent. She closed her eyes, letting the weightless feeling of freedom consume her, and she heard Poe laugh loudly.

If Phasma was here, she knew she'd be laughing right along with her.

\-------------------------------------------------------

They didn't stop until late dawn, and Rey stood outside on the perimeter of their camp as she watched the sun rise higher and higher into the sky.

She could hear Kylo talking to Hux, hear him apologizing for how he had reacted in the kitchen, and Hux kept brushing it off as if it wasn't anything.

She could hear Poe and Finn conversing as well, the both of them talking out strategies and being prepared for anything and everything. They were like that, they were planners, and Rey was glad that they had agreed to come with them.

The more there were in their pack, the better chances they had to make it out of this alive.

"Hey," Poe spoke up from behind her as he walked up to her, Rey turning around to see a wanted poster in his hand and a grin on his face. "I thought you would want to see this."

Rey furrowed her brows as she took the wanted poster, a loud laugh nearly slipping from her lips as she recognized who it was.

It was her.

"Oh, God, look at that! Oh, my Lord, how'd they get this out so fa--'White Mamba'," Rey breathed out the name that had been given to her, gently touching the printing of it as a warm feeling blossomed in her chest. 

"Oh, but you missed the best part," Poe smirked as he moved to stand beside her, pointing at the text as to why she was wanted. "' _Wanted for fraud, theft, accessory to murder, and being the lover of the Black Mamba.'_ "

"That--lying about being a bounty hunter isn't fraud...that's more impersonation than anything--"

"I told you they knew," Hux called out and Rey looked towards him with wide eyes to see Kylo smirking beside him and beaming with inner pride.

"It's...really that obvious?" Rey looked back down at the poster and she heard Kylo chuckle as he stood up. "And how the hell is being the lover of someone get you on a wanted poster? I feel like they ran out of crimes and just slapped that on there for gossip."

"Oh, but it's wonderful," Kylo purred as he walked over and took the poster from her, smacking his hand against it as he grinned. "And they even drew you with my hat! Look at that, darlin', they got all the detailin' right!"

"Yeah, but...I don't even wear white, why would they--"

"Because it makes sense," Poe shrugged and Kylo glanced up at him before looking at Rey. "I mean, it's kind of like yin and yang, right? I think that's what they were going for."

"I love it," Kylo spoke softly without taking his eyes off of Rey and she gave him a blinding smile. 

An hour later, and they were all seated around the campfire as Poe and Finn began to explain everything.

"He's been following your scent since you murdered him six years ago now, Ren, and he's found a way to mask his scent," Poe leaned forward as the firelight danced on his features, his eyes practically glowing in the light. "It's how you couldn't smell him in Niima."

"But why wouldn't he just attack us?" Rey asked and Finn sucked in his breath.

"Because he wants to kill everyone around Ren first so Ren has absolutely nothing."

Kylo sat back as his body went lax, his eyes looking down on the ground as rage slowly began to swirl around within him. "So, it's a game to him basically,"

"Bingo," Poe sighed loudly as he looked towards him. "And he specifically chose Finn and I because of Rey. He sees Rey as this...um," Poe shifted uncomfortably as he looked away. "'Outlaw whore'. His words, not mine."

"Because being called a whore is so original," Rey murmured and Kylo growled beside her as they both wallowed in the anger of the nickname Snoke had given her.

"And he'd been planning on murdering Phasma first for quite some time now," Poe frowned and Hux inhaled shakily as tears pricked his eyes.

"Fuck," Hux choked out as he looked up at the sky. " _Fuck_."

"But how did you leave the ghost town so quickly before we go there? And Phasma said that it smelled like Snoke had been gone for two days at the maximum." Leave it to Rey to want to know the logic behind the seemingly unrealistic.

She paused before asking, "And Beebee? Where's Beebee?"

"Scent masking," Finn responded as he poked the firewood with a stick, a burst of embers going into the night sky as he did so. "He taught us all how to mask our scent so you wouldn't grow suspicious. And we weren't far off. We've never been far off, we've always been right behind you. We were just biting our time until you were most vulnerable, and that time was the farm house."

"And Beebee is with Amilyn," Poe smiled tiredly. "He's perfectly safe."

"Could you have stopped Gwen from being killed?" Rey whispered and Hux froze, Kylo glancing over at him with mournful eyes as Hux glanced right back at him.

"No," Poe shook his head as he looked down. "No, we would've been killed ourselves if we tried to intervene." 

"Snoke will stop being a manipulative jackass when bulls start wearin' bloomers," Kylo ran a hand down his face as he bit back a growl.

"...This is the first time we've actually been running and winning, isn't it?" Rey asked quietly and both Poe and Finn nodded.

"And it's so shitty all this happened on your birthday," Finn sucked in his breath as he closed his eyes for a moment, his brows furrowing as his eyes saddened. "I'm so sorry, Rey. I'm so, so sorry that all of this has happened."

"Oh, my God," Rey closed her eyes as she fought back tears. She had completely forgotten that yesterday had been her birthday.

For her birthday, her gift had been to watch Phasma die.

"I--excuse me, for a moment," Rey opened her eyes and instantly stood up, rushing off to Kylo's tent and vanishing inside.

She sat down on the cot, wrapping her arms around herself, and began to cry silently as she gasped for air that she knew she needed more than anything in the world.

"Hey, hey, hey," Kylo came rushing in, crouching down in front of her and putting his hands on her thighs as he looked up at her with panicked concern. "Breathe, Luna. In and out, in and out. In and out; slow as molasses. Come on, now."

Rey hiccuped as she shakily breathed in and out as slowly as she could manage, only to squeeze her eyes shut and shake her head as her breathing turned ragged and soon she was hyperventilating.

"Baby--Luna, oh, God, Luna," Tears sprang to Kylo's eyes as he stood up, sitting on the cot beside her and pulling her into his lap. She instantly clung to him, burying her face in his shoulder as she sobbed uncontrollably and wailed at the top of her lungs.

Outside of the tent, it was silent. Poe, Finn and Hux were all looking downward with solemn expressions, and all of their hearts broke at the sound of Rey collectively losing herself at the very thought of remembering that, for her birthday, she had watched Phasma die right in front of her.

In Rey's mind, it wasn't just about that, though. It was about everything.

It was about Kaydel, about her Father, about Snoke, about Phasma, and about the very idea of losing Kylo and everyone else.

Yes, even Hux at this point. What a strange, heartbreaking redemption arc the redhead had been given.

"We're gonna get through this together," Kylo held her tightly as he bit back a sob. Seeing her like this, hearing her like this...it _hurt_.

"I-I promise. I promise."

\-------------------------------------------------------

Around eight in the morning, when everyone else was asleep, Rey awoke and made her way out of the tent to where Phasma's horse was.

Hux had insisted that they bring Phasma's clothes with them, and Rey knew exactly what she was doing.

There were clothes in one of Phasma's saddlebags that she barely ever wore, insisting that they just didn't fit her 'aesthetic' (which Phasma had always then looked at Kylo and burst out laughing), and Rey silently pulled them out before sitting outside of the tent and going to work.

"They want an outlaw," Rey whispered as she sewed and mended the clothes. "And Snoke wants an outlaw," Another stitch. Another mending. "Then that's what they'll get."

 _"I don't want you to ever be forced to do something you don't want, Rey."_ Phasma's words echoed in her head and Rey paused before shaking her head.

"I don't have a choice anymore, Gwen."

Fifty minutes later and Rey threw open Kylo's tent flaps, Kylo flinching from the sudden sunlight as he sat up only to freeze.

She was dressed all in white except for small splashes of black such as her boots and his hat. White pants, white blouse, long white coat, white leather vest, white leather gloves, and a white bandana covering her lower face. She was practically glowing in all the white she wore, looking a star who had just burst into its very existence.

And, in a sense, she had been born again.

"We're leaving," Rey spoke loudly and Kylo stared at her with wide eyes. "Get ready."

"...You're really livin' up to the White Mamba, huh?" Kylo breathed out and Rey smirked underneath her bandana before closing the tent flaps.

_Yes, I am. And I'm going to coat this white with the blood of Snoke and all who oppose us._


	19. Chapter 19

Kylo almost didn't believe how quickly her thirst for vengeance became.

Yes, he was heartbroken over Phasma, but Rey? Rey was no longer sad. She was _angry_.

A week on the road after the farmhouse incident, and she hadn't let her (Phasma's) guns out of her sight and even slept with one under her pillow. 

He knew she was ready for a fight. Hell, so was he and everyone else to defend themselves, but it was almost as if Rey _wanted_ a fight with any golden eyed opposer.

And it wasn't that he didn't want a fight as well, per se, as he most certainly did, but Rey didn't want just a fight. She wanted a war.

She had this aura of irritation surrounding her, engulfing her in red inferno, and Kylo couldn't help but feel on edge each time they heard a rustling nearby. 

He was afraid she'd jump the gun and shoot whoever it was, and normally he wouldn't care. But now, he did. He cared because when he looked in Rey's eyes, he saw blood. Honey had melted into blood, sweetness into bitter iron.

"We're almost to Missouri," Rey announced on the seventh night as she smoothed a map out on the ground by the fire, Poe and Finn crouched down on both sides of her as they looked down at it well.

"We can take the shortcut here," Rey's finger trailed up a large stream before pointing at Missouri. "We could be there by tomorrow morning if we go in the next few hours."

"And why is it that, for the last seven days, you've nearly made it impossible to rest?" Hux muttered several feet away from his sleeping bag, Rey not even looking up at him as she scoffed.

"Because I want to find a place that's to our advantage before they ambush us again, Copperhead--"

"Oh, ho-ho, using code names are we! It's almost as if you've become a mini Ren!" Hux barked out a laugh and Rey rolled her eyes.

"Wait, I want a cool snake name," Poe murmured and Finn hesitated before shrugging and nodding in agreement with him.

"Then pick one for yourself--"

"Rey, that's no fun," Finn huffed and Rey smiled as she closed up the map.

"It's better than being upset about the one you're given, isn't it? So, pick snake names out for yourself--or wait until you're on a wanted poster. They seem to be great at picking names."

"What if they say 'garden snake', or some shit," Poe groaned as he sat on the ground. "I don't want to be a garden snake. I want to be something cool like a...like a cobra or something. Would a cobra be cool, Finn?"

"Rattler and Coachwhip," Kylo emerged from his tent with an annoyed expression. "Take those or wait for the wanted posters. I don't care, I'm tired, and I want to at least get an hour before Luna starts draggin' us off to Missouri."

"Coachwhips aren't venomous, what the hell?!" Poe barked and Rey sighed as she stood up, placing the map under her arm as well as the small bag beside her before walking off towards the river she saw not that far off from where they were resting.

"What about Diamondback and Rattler?" Poe turned to look at Finn and Finn snapped his fingers as he grinned.

"I call Rattler," Finn winked and Poe chuckled as he rolled his eyes playfully.

Kylo hesitated before following Rey, looking at the bag under her arm before walking closer. "They do know that a rattler and a diamondback are the same thing, correct? Just different variations?"

"Oh, hush," Rey chuckled as she looked over and up at him. "They're a pair just like we are. If we're the Black and White Mamba, why can't they be Rattler and Diamondback? It's cute."

"It's ridiculous--"

"Don't be so cynical!" Rey laughed loudly and Kylo huffed as he glanced away.

"Hux is right," Kylo sighed and Rey blinked before furrowing her brows.

"You have been becomin' a little mini me in the last week."

"You say it almost as if it's a bad thing," Rey's lips twitched up into a smile but her eyes were nervous. "Am I not allowed to show rage? Is that it? Do you prefer me sweet?"

"Rey--"

"They killed her," She stepped in front of him, her eyes fiery as she glared ever so slightly up at him. "They killed her, Kylo. And I want to kill them back. We just need to get to a good place to do it."

"A good place? Or a place where you're positive you won't lose anyone else?" Kylo asked and Rey stayed silent as she glanced away, her expression turning tired as she shoved the map in her bag.

"Both." She murmured before turning back around and heading towards the river, Kylo pausing before following her once more and gently taking her hand in his. She looked up at him as he interlaced their fingers, a tired smile painting her lips as he sighed.

"I don't wanna lose you to rage," Kylo spoke up as they got to the river. "You shouldn't be angry when I..."

"How many more days until the full moon?" Rey asked quietly as she began to undress.

"Two days." Kylo responded in the same quiet tone and Rey froze with her blouse in her hands.

Two days. That's all she had left as a human. Forty-eight hours. Two thousand eight hundred and eighty minutes. One hundred seventy-two thousand and eight hundred seconds. Then the full moon would rise, and that would be it for her humanity.

You never really think about your humanity until its at stake. You don't sit back and graciously commend your human morals until you know you're about to lose it from one singular act.

Would it hurt? Could she possibly die? She felt faint suddenly, swaying on her feet for a moment before forcing herself to stand up straight as she nodded slowly in his direction.

"Two days," Rey finally echoed as she peeled off the rest of her clothes, getting into the river and letting the cool water kiss her skin. "Forty-eight hours."

"You know I'm gonna do it as gently as possible, right? I ain't gon' hurt you," Kylo was in the river with her not but two minutes later, the both of them washing themselves with the soap from her bag.

"What if I d--"

"For one singular fuckin' day, I'd really not think 'bout death," Kylo bit out and Rey paused as she slowly looked over at him.

"...Okay," Rey whispered and Kylo inhaled shakily as his eyes stared into hers with a fear she knew far too well at this point; the fear of loss. "Okay. I get it."

"Yeah," He sounded irritated. Beyond irritated, actually. He also sounded exhausted to the point where the only emotions he could feel were anger and irritance. "I hope you do."

"Are we fighting?" Rey arched a brow and Kylo simply evaded her question by dunking himself in the water and then coming back to shake the water from his hair.

"You're mad at me? Why?" Her tone was becoming angrier and angrier, her eye twitching for a brief second as she gripped the bar of soap in her hand tightly.

"You're obviously readin' too far into things, darlin', I never said I was mad at you--"

"ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS!" Rey screamed and Kylo flinched as he clenched his jaw. 

"I am mad at the situation, not you--"

"You're fucking tense, that's the problem," Rey hissed and Kylo opened his mouth to speak before closing it as confusion entered his aureate eyes. 

"Rey," He spoke softly as he gently took the soap from her hands, wading over to the side and placing it on her bag before wading back over. "You're the most tense one here. Not me. You're like a...a faulty firecracker on the fourth of July. You're barkin' mad, at this point, and I don't mean insane. I mean angry. Like, really, _really_ angry. At everythin'."

"W-why aren't you?!" Rey cried out as tears sprang to her eyes. "Why aren't you mad, Kylo?! Why is no one fucking mad?! Even Hux is hiding his anger, and he was in _love_ with her! Why is it just me?!"

"Oh, baby," Kylo spoke softly as he pulled her close, resting his chin on top of her head as he stared out at the night. "Of course I'm mad."

"Then why aren't you--"

"Because I'm savin' it," He closed his eyes as his arms around her tightened. "For _Snoke_." 

Rey had never heard someone say a name so full of hatred before.

"I-I feel like I'm losing my mind," Rey slid her hands up his back as a few tears slid down her cheeks. "This rage, it's just... _eating_ me."

"It's eatin' at Hux and I, too," Kylo reopened his eyes as he sucked in his breath. "But we're keepin' it in for Snoke. Call it unhealthy, I don't care, but I ain't paradin' this rage around for just anyone to see. I want to explode on him; not on you or anyone else."

Rey pulled back and stared up at him before leaning up and kissing him, placing her hand on his cheek as he instantly kissed back.

He nearly choked when he felt her other hand sliding down his abdomen, her hand gripping the base of his cock and squeezing ever so gently as she let out a quiet mewl against his lips.

"R-Rey," Kylo pulled back and Rey bit her lower lip as she stared up at him with eyes that spoke volumes of drunken lust.

In the week they had been on the road, they hadn't exactly done anything sexual due to the fact of the situation. He hadn't made any advances, and neither had she, and Kylo nearly whined as she began to slowly pump his cock in her hand.

"I miss you fucking me," Rey whispered and Kylo nearly lost his goddamn mind right there.

"A-all you had to do was ask--"

"I thought it inappropriate...because of...you know..."

"I-I think--I think sex can be a healthy copin' mechanism, I don't know--"

"Yeah?"

" _Yes_." Kylo hissed out as she squeezed the base once again, this time not as gently.

Rey slowly got on his knees in the river, the water coming up to her mid chest, and she looked up at him before smiling and swallowing him down almost to the hilt.

"Oh, sweet mother of Jesus," Kylo breathed out as he instantly tangled his hands in her hair, his head nearly falling back as she worked him down to the bone.

Her tongue swiped beneath and over the head of his cock as her hand never stopped pumping him, sucking even harder at the loud, pleased growls streaming from his throat as his hands tightened in her wet hair. She could tell he was holding back, that he desperately wanted to fuck her throat raw to the point where she wouldn't be able to speak for a day, and he growled especially loud as the tip grazed the back of her throat.

"You-- _fuck_ ," Kylo groaned and she felt her cunt throbbing unbearably at this point, and she found it slightly comedic that she could feel how wet she was--even in the water--without touching herself.

His hands suddenly yanking her head back made her gasp loudly, her chest heaving as air once again reentered her lungs.

"Bend over," Kylo growled loudly as he nodded his head towards the side of the stream and Rey whined softly at the loss of his cock in her mouth. She could still taste the salt of his pre-cum on her tongue, but she knew he'd rather cum inside of her than her mouth. He almost always did.

" _Now._ " He shoved her, although not too harshly, towards the side and she obeyed. She bent over and laid on her stomach on the grass, lifting her ass up in the air to which she whined especially loud as she felt him slowly swipe two fingers up and in-between her folds.

"Look at that," Kylo breathed out almost in awe. "It's almost as if you're in heat. You're that wet, darlin'."

"F-fuck me," Rey whimpered as tears pricked her eyes. "Please?"

"No need to beg." He purred as he lined himself up, slowly pushing in before gripping her hips and pulling out ever so slightly before snapping his hips forward roughly.

Rey nearly screamed as he did so, her hands gripping the grass as he pounded into her from behind as if he hadn't fucked her in months instead of just one week.

" _Luna_ ," He growled once again as he tangled a hand in her hair with other hand still gripping her hip tightly, Rey crying out as he yanked her head back. 

"K-Kylo--"

"We are _never_ waitin' this long to fuck again," He snarled as thrusts picked up, and Rey knew he was getting close. "We are never-- _fuck_ \--"

Rey's cunt clenched around him as she came, a scream tearing from her throat as her body shuddered with the blinding white behind her eyes from the all too sudden orgasm.

He quickly followed her, his hips stuttering as he came, and a loud grunt flew from his lips as he pressed his hips tightly against her ass as he closed his eyes and let out a shuddering breath as his body slowly relaxed.

"Shit," He breathed out as he opened his eyes and untangled his hand from her hair, leaning down and nosing the back of her shoulder as he smiled. "I didn't hurt you, did I?"

"N-no," Rey breathed out shakily as she closed her eyes and let herself melt into the grass. "No, you're good. We're good."

He pulled out a minute later, pulling her up and washing her off.

Needless to say, she slept more than fine for a few hours before they hit the road again.

\--------------------------------------------------------

"They're going to Missouri," A man with golden eyes spoke quietly in a dark room in the town a few miles away from where Kylo and the others had set up camp in Kansas, a pair of golden eyes shining back at him.

"They'll most likely be there by tomorrow morning."

"Perfect," Snoke chuckled as he grinned, leaning back against his chair as he swirled the dark, thick liquid in his cup. "And the traitors are still with them?"

"Yes, sir."

"We'll shoot them first," He chuckled as he took a sip from his glass. "Then that redhead."

"And the girl?"

"Oh," Snoke laughed. "I look forward to killing her in front of Ren's eyes. Leave her to me. I believe we'll wait until after the full moon, just so he can see her new golden eyes ripped from her skull."

"Alright." The man left and Snoke laughed again.

"Doomed to be a tragedy indeed, Ren."


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, man ;-; I am so sorry I haven't updated in a hot minute! I've been working on my other fic more, and, in all honesty, I was a little stumped on what should happen in this chapter. I know _exactly_ what happens in chapter twenty-one, but for chapter twenty I was like "well, shit" BUT THEN I FIGURED IT OUT, SO WE'RE ALL GOOD 
> 
> I would also just like to say thank you for commenting and leaving kudos, it honestly means the absolute world to me 🥺💕
> 
> Also, this is kind of a Hux chapter? If that makes sense.

An abandoned factory.

The bricks were dirty, dust covering every surface, and yet Rey found it perfect.

She began to map the whole place out, scribbling down the floor plans in a pocket book as she hurriedly scaped out every single possible inch of the abandoned perimeters. 

"Look at her go," Finn said as he, Hux and Poe watched her scramble around like a chicken with its head cut off with Kylo quickly following behind her.

"You'd think armageddon is coming with how fast she's going," Poe murmured and Hux snorted out a laugh as he rolled his eyes.

"I'm pretty sure she thinks this _is_ armageddon, when, in reality, it'll be an easy shootout with how many there are of us--"

"Depending on the wolves that come," Poe and Finn said in unison and Hux deadpanned as he looked over at the pair.

"It'll be an easy shootout. I have good aim when I'm angry." Hux hissed out as he narrowed his eyes and Poe hummed quietly.

"You think you could take them all, Hugs?"

Hux had grown to _despise_ this nickname over the past week. Poe would constantly be calling him 'Hugs', and Hux knew it was only because Poe knew it irritated him beyond belief.

"I very well could, I don't--what are you doing?" Hux blinked as Poe looked up at the ceiling with squinty eyes with one hand at his brow level like some sort of explorer searching for something.

"What're you looking for, Poe?" Finn smirked and Poe sighed dramatically as he brought his head back down to look from left to right and then behind him.

"I'm looking for Hux's humbleness, but I just can't seem to find it--"

"You're a fucking prick," Hux announced loudly and both Finn and Poe burst into loud laughter as they put their arms around each other's shoulders.

"God, it is _so_ fun pissing you off! Wow!" Poe laughed harder and Hux grumbled in annoyance as he crossed his arms with a sour expression.

"Okay," Rey called out from down the hall, the sound of her running towards them pounding in their ears.

She scrambled up to them, thrusting the notebook into Poe's hand with an enthusiastic grin as she said, "I mapped everything out! If we could all just study it and choose the proper positioning--"

"You...really did map this whole place out, huh?" Poe cut her off as he flipped through a few pages, his eyes wide at her frantic detailing. 

"Well, yeah," Rey cleared her throat as she stood up straighter, adjusting her (Kylo's) hat on her head as it had become askew with her running. "For strategy."

"Let's just pray that they don't come tomorrow, shall we?" Hux sighed as he snatched the book from Poe and Poe let out a low growl at the sudden movement.

"They won't," Kylo grumbled as he walked in from the hallway, his hand instantly darting out and grabbing Rey's wrist to pull her close to him.

"God, you grab her like a rag doll," Finn mumbled angrily and Kylo growled softly before looking away.

"You two wouldn't understand," Hux muttered as he flipped through the pages of her map. He wasn't showing it, but he was actually quite impressed with her detailing and choices for good positions. 

"It's an _Alpha_ thing. They're terribly possessive; much like a rabid dog over a bone." Hux sighed loudly in a tired tone and Kylo growled softly before Rey looked up at him and shook her head.

"...Sure," Kylo smiled tightly. "Sure, my Luna is a _bone_." The word was spoken with so much hatred that Rey felt as if fire itself had doused his tongue.

"H-ha-ha-ha, yes, okay," Rey laughed uneasily as she grabbed Kylo's hand and started to drag him away. "Study the layout, please! I'll meet back up with you all in an hour to see if you've memorized it!"

"I thought we talked about your aggression last night," Rey hissed and Kylo grumbled under his breath as he let her lead him.

"I'm _tired_ ," Kylo hissed out as he narrowed his eyes. "And I'm _hungry_. And let's also not forget that the full moon is tomorrow so my emotions are on the fritz. So, I'm terribly sorry I'm gettin' angry at Hux callin' you a bone and me a rabid dog."

"You are more than welcome to sleep," Rey pulled him into a large storage room of sorts, letting go of his hand to go over to her bag and she began to pull out a quilt. "As for food, I can't help you there as our diets are different. Perhaps you could try what Finn and Poe do: eat raw animals."

"Eatin' animals doesn't do jackshit," Kylo hissed out yet again as he watched her smooth the quilt out on the ground. "It barely sates the hunger."

"God, you're so grumpy." Rey muttered as she laid down on the quilt after taking her (his) hat off, rolling over on her side and closing her eyes.

"What are you doin'?" 

"I'm sleeping. I need it." 

Kylo watched her for a brief second before walking over and sitting down beside her, his knees bent with his feet planted firmly on the ground as he slowly took off his gloves before asking, "Are you scared?"

"Of the men coming?" Rey murmured sleepily and Kylo exhaled with a tired smile as he shook his head.

"No, of tomorrow night. Of the full moon."

She opened her eyes before looking over her shoulder at him. "You mean how you're going to bite me?"

"Yeah," His voice was painfully soft. "Yeah. Are you scared?"

Rey sighed loudly as she flipped over on her side facing him, slapping her hand down on his thigh as she looked up at him and said, "Should I be?"

"...I'll be as gentle as possible--"

"I know," She affectionately patted his thigh. "I know you will. Just don't fully maim me, yeah? Try not to bite down to the--" She cut herself off at his horrified expression, his eyes filled to the brim with terror as he let out a quiet whine.

"...Okay," Rey sucked in her breath as she sat up, taking his hand and holding it in hers as she looked him in the eyes. "It's okay. Everything is okay. You're going to turn me, we're going to kill Snoke's men and then we're going to kill Snoke. Then we'll go live out in the countryside, yeah? We're going to build a house? Have a little house on the prairie?"

Kylo gave her a single nod before pushing her hair back with a tired smile once more. "Yeah. Yeah, we're gonna be livin' on the prairie in two shakes of a lamb's tail."

"Oh, there you go about lambs again." Rey chortled before leaning forward and kissing him softly before pulling back and looking towards the entrance of the storage room.

She felt his hand on her back suddenly, his fingertips and palm gently sliding down until they reached the small of her back. She heard him give out a breathy sigh, one that told her all she needed to know, and she responded with a soft hum as she leaned back against him.

"You honestly think it's safe to stay here for two nights?" Kylo asked and Rey simply nodded.

"Yeah. Yeah, I do."

\---------------------------------------------------------

When she awoke, it was nearly dawn. How she had slept in so late, she didn't know, but she completely blamed Kylo and his warmth. She had always slept amazingly in warm conditions rather than cold, and Kylo was as warm as warm could get.

It was dark in the storage room, the only light she could see was the light streaming in from the hallway windows outside the room, and she found herself immobile from Kylo's arms wrapped tightly around her like a vice; like he was afraid she'd be gone at any moment even in sleep.

She sighed quietly before eventually wiggling herself out of his grasp, standing up and stretching as she yawned.

She walked out of the room, heading down the hall and into the main factory room only to find Hux sitting alone on one of the window edges with a hand rolled cigarette dangling from his lips.

"Morning," He said dryly in a mumbled tone and Rey silently walked over before crawling up and sitting beside him.

"I didn't know a grump like you even liked sunrises," Rey playfully elbowed him in the shoulder with a grin and she was met with a bark of a laugh in response.

"Who said that grumps can't like sunrises, Rey? Is there some handbook for grumps out there that I should know about?"

"Mmn, no," Rey smiled as she leaned against the windowpane, the sunlight filtering in and coating her skin with a sheen of brilliant gold. "I just didn't think that you enjoyed nature."

"Oh, no, I absolutely loathe nature," Hux stated before taking his cigarette from his lips to flick the ash on the ground. "But that doesn't mean I don't appreciate it every now and again. Certain sunrises can be rather peaceful."

"Why only certain ones?"

"Because I was enjoying this one in peace," His eyes flicked over to hers. "But I suppose it can still be peaceful...if you be quiet and just embrace the silence of early morning."

"...And if I wish to talk?"

"Curse your stubbornness," Hux deadpanned before taking a long drag and then putting his cigarette out on the spot in front of him. "I don't know how Gwen even tolerated it."

"She tolerated you." Rey narrowed her eyes and Hux paused before scoffing loudly with a smile.

"Touché... _sunshine_." He smirked and Rey huffed silently as she looked forward.

"...You know you can talk to me about her, right? You know that?" Rey muttered as she pressed her hand against the dusty glass, the warmth of the light seeping into her palm. 

"Of course I know, but do you perhaps think that I don't want to? That I wish to keep some things personal and private? That I would like certain memories of her to remain as just my own?" Hux bit out and Rey glanced down as she nodded solemnly.

She completely understood. She was the same way when people used to ask about Reverend Kenobi. She'd snap at them, ask them why they were even interfering with her personal life, but that had all melted away with time.

Hux needed time. He just needed time, and she was more than happy to give that to him.

For the next several hours, everyone lounged around lazily.

They had went over Rey's plans after everyone had woken up, and everyone had agreed that they were, in fact, good plans. She had beamed proudly at that, Kylo having ruffled her hair and praising her. 

"I call this one," Poe announced from one of the ceiling beams he was lounging on with his guitar in his hands, everyone's eyes darting up to him as he grinned, "'My lover and I were bitten.'"

"Oh, God, not another bloody song," Hux sneered and Finn jabbed him in the ribs.

This would be the fifth song in an hour, though.

" _Oh, I didn't ask for it, but that big, bad moon came arising, and believe me, it was surprising when I got bit. Hurt like hell, heard hell's bells, and I thought I would diiiieeee--_ "

"We basically did die," Finn murmured and Poe looked down at him slowly as he deadpanned.

"Do I interrupt you when you're playing guitar?"

"I don't play guitar."

"Yeah, well--" Poe huffed as he looked away. "I wouldn't if you did. Because I respect you."

"...Wonderful." Finn spoke dryly and Poe nodded at him before looking down at the guitar.

"And you ruined the mood." Poe glowered and Rey frowned.

"Aw, no, Poe, I love your songs--"

"Don't encourage him," Kylo muttered from where he was laying against the wall, his eyes tired and his expression one of utter irritation. "I don't want to hear anymore made up songs about becomin' a goddamn wolf. All of us but one have lived that nightmare, and I don't want Rey to be freaked out more than she already is."

"Oh, Ren," Hux sighed as he closed his eyes. "As if you can't already smell her fear about tonight. You honestly think she isn't--"

A loud gunshot outside spooked all of them, Poe nearly falling off of the ceiling beam as he bolted up with wide eyes and said, "What in the fucking hell was that?!"

"A gunshot, you loon!" Hux snarled and Kylo instinctually wrapped his arms around Rey, holding her tightly against him as a loud, protective growl streamed from his throat.

"I'll go see what it is," Hux stood up and Rey instantly reached out to him to try and stop him, only for Kylo to lower her arm and shake his head. This was what Deltas were meant to do, after all.

"I'll come with you," Poe stated as he jumped down from the rafter, landing perfectly on his feet as he tossed the guitar on the floor and rushed up to the redhead with a smile. "Deltas stick together, right?"

"...Fucking Christ," Hux murmured in annoyance before storming out of the factory with Poe only for the both of them to freeze as they saw one of Snoke's men several feet away.

"Your Alpha sent the Deltas out to play, hmm? Typical. He would normally send the Betas out, but...you're missing one, aren't you?" The man's eyes flashed with demented excitement but Hux remained stoic as he placed his hand over his pistol.

"And you, Poe," The man's eyes flicked to Poe. "I'm honestly not surprised you ran off with the enemy. We should've shot you and the Beta the moment Snoke turned--"

A loud gunshot rang through the air as a bullet whizzed past the man's head and Hux narrowed his eyes as he lowered his pistol. Neither the man or Poe had seen him take it out.

"You know what, fire crotch? _I'm_ the one that killed that blonde bitch!" The man spat and Hux froze.

"...Alright," Hux stated bluntly before inhaling sharply, and almost in the blink of an eye, he had easily shot the man in the head.

But that wasn't enough for him.

It really, _really_ wasn't.

He silently walked over to the corpse, Poe clenching his fists as he let out all rounds into the corpse's skull before spitting on what once was a face and he let out an animalistic scream.

This was a man in pain. This was a man who had lost who was most likely the absolute love of his life, and now he was taking revenge on the man who had taken that love from him. 

And Poe knew Hux had every right to do so.

It echoed, reverberating in the air and pounding in Poe's eardrums like drums of war, and he nearly fell to his knees as Hux let out another scream. Yet this scream was far more heartbroken, far more painfully tortured, and he couldn't help but let out a small whine.

Hux stood there in silence besides the sound of the gun shots still echoing in the air, his chest heaving up and down erratically as tears blurred his vision.

"Her name was fucking _Gwen_." Hux ground out in a pained tone.

"Her name was Gwen," Poe whispered as he approached Hux cautiously, the redhead turning his head to look at him with angered, broken eyes. "Her name was Gwen."

"Y-yeah," Hux breathed out shakily as he put his gun back in his holster, Poe gently patting him on the back as they both stared down at the corpse. "Her name was Gwen."

"Do you want to eat him?" Poe asked as his mouth ran dry in disgust at the thought and he sighed in relief as Hux shook his head slowly. 

In Hux's mind, he was staring down at Phasma.

It was her corpse he was seeing, not this man's, and his eyes went wide as continued to stare down at the illusion brought on by trauma and exhaustion. Her eye...what happened to her eye? Why was her hair red? Why--why wasn't she--

"Hey, hey," Poe gently grabbed Hux's wrist and turned him towards him. "Hey, it's okay. He's dead. He's dead, Hux. You avenged her."

But he didn't feel like he had. He still felt empty, still felt hollow, and all he wanted to do was see her one more time.

"...Yeah," Hux rasped out as he yanked his arm back, turning and walking back towards the factory as Poe stood still and unmoving.

"Yeah, Poe. I avenged her."

In reality, he felt like he only made the emptiness worse.


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this chapter is so short ;-; the next one will be longer, I promise

As Hux stormed back in, with Poe hot on his tail, Rey stood up much to Kylo's dismay as she asked, "What's going on?"

"We can't stay here any longer, that's what's going on." Hux bristled and Rey's face fell before hardening.

"No, no, I mapped this whole place out--"

"Control your Luna, Ren," Hux snarled and Kylo growled loudly as he stood up.

"She doesn't _need_ to be controlled--"

"She wants to stay in a place that will be crawling with wolves in their true form soon! She'll be torn to shreds and as will we! We didn't plan for this, only for a shootout!" Hux snarled again and Poe and Finn watched cautiously. If a fight broke out between the Alpha and Delta, they would do what was necessary and yank Rey from the scene. If Rey got accidentally hurt, the both of them were certain that Kylo would kill Hux.

"I mapped--"

"I'M TRYING TO PROTECT YOU!" Hux screamed at the top of his lungs and the room delved into that certain type of silence where you could hear a pen drop. 

Hux's chest heaved erratically as he stared at her, his eyes wild and hair disheveled. He looked as if he had just been through Hell and back. He appeared to be glaring at her, as if she was the source of every single one of his problems, but Rey knew he was glaring at her because she wasn't listening; because she was being stubborn.

"...Okay," Rey spoke softly and Kylo looked down at her incredulously. "Okay. Okay, we can go."

Hux stood there for a moment with wild eyes still, his eyes searching hers for a moment before he hissed under his breath and stormed out of the room and down the hall.

"Did I hear that right? Did Hux say he wanted to _protect you_?" Finn asked and Rey swallowed silently as she stared at the place at where he had been standing.

"...Pack up," Rey ordered quietly and Kylo continued to look down at her in disbelief. Hux was right, of course, but she had given in so easily. She hadn't been stubborn for more than one minute before agreeing, and he wondered as to why. Why would she listen to him so easily?

Rey grabbed Kylo's hand and ran with him to the storage room, the both of them packing up in rushed silence with the only sound being her slightly ragged breathing. And then he understood.

She had agreed because she was _terrified_. She must've assumed if Hux was wanting to protect her, it must be more than serious. If this was just a small problem, Hux wouldn't bother. But since the full moon was tonight, only about six hours away, she knew this was bigger than anything she had faced.

"Hey--"

"No talking," Rey blurted out as she scooped up the quilt with trembling hands. "Just packing."

"Luna--"

"K-Kylo, please, you don't get it--"

"You're afraid." Kylo stated bluntly and Rey froze, the quilt falling from her hands and falling onto the floor in a great, big heap of white and blue. 

"No shit." Rey whispered back and Kylo's eyes softened as he walked over to her, kneeling down beside her and snaking one arm around her wait from behind as he rested his head against hers. 

"We got this," Kylo began in that blanket-like tone. "Remember? If we get through tonight with no problems, then we're fine. We just need to not run into his men tonight, and it's damn unfortunate one of them found us. I thought you did a good job mappin' this place out."

"I did an amazing job," Rey spoke shakily as she ran her hands over the quilt. Soft. Soft, it was soft. She tried to lose herself in the softness, to try and soothe her frazzled, panicked nerves, but it wasn't working. Nothing was helping. 

"Look at me," Kylo turned her face towards his, and she felt a wave of tranquility wash over her by staring into his endless pools of gold. He gently nosed her cheek for a moment before kissing her softly, her hand instantly going up to his cheek as her eyes fluttered closed.

"Ren," Hux called out from the doorway of the storage room, making Rey's eyes fly open, and Kylo turned his head to look at him.

"We need to talk. Now."

"...Give me a second, darlin'." Kylo murmured and Rey frowned but nodded. She watched him get up and go over to Hux, Hux dragging Ren out into the hall to where she couldn't hear.

"You can't turn her tonight." Hux stated angrily and Kylo stared at him before slowly smiling and scoffing as loud as he could.

"Excuse me?"

"I know you heard me."

"No, I need to hear it again."

"...Kylo," Hux lowered his tone and Kylo froze at that. Hux never used his first name. Never. "Please. For the pack's safety, do not bite her tonight. Wait another month, okay? I know you can do it--"

"No." Kylo cut him off as he reared back and Hux's face fell before hardening. "No, Hux, I'm bitin' her tonight. I can take care of her, she won't be a liability."

Hux stared at him for that, his fists balling up at his sides as rage flashed in his eyes. He sneered coldly before taking a step closer to Kylo, grabbing him by the shirt collar and growling out, "She's not fucking worth all of our deaths, Kylo. We've already lost one, we can't afford to lose any more."

"She's worth _everythin'_ \--"

"Not to me!" Hux snarled and Kylo snarled right back as he pushed the fiery Delta away. 

"You're not the Alpha--"

"And you're not acting like one! Think about it!" Hux nearly shouted before grabbing at his hair and letting out a dry sob, "We're all going to die and it'll be because you can't wait to have pups. Pups, Kylo, are not good for this situation! Fucking--fucking push down your instincts and think about the rest of us!"

"Oh, you're suddenly includin' Poe and Finn? Since when?" Kylo sneered.

"Only because we have a larger pack with them in it! Goddammit, you stubborn, stubborn man, will you just listen to me?!"

"I'm bitin' her. That's final." Kylo hissed and Hux screamed at him before hitting the wall and hunching over with trembling shoulders. He hit the wall again before cursing loudly, whipping his head towards Kylo with wild eyes as he snapped his jaw in defiance.

"You're fucking _absurd_ , Ren." And, with that, Hux stormed off in a frenzied panic induced rage.

Kylo stared off at him before he felt arms wrap around his arm, Rey's scent hitting him all at once and his eyes nearly rolled back as he instantly entered a state of utter relaxation. Sometimes she had this effect on him.

"You okay?" Rey asked softly and Kylo hummed in response as he leaned into her. 

"We will be. They just don't understand how valuable you'll be as a wolf." Kylo sighed and Rey looked up at him in confusion before nodding.

"Let's go finish packing, little lamb," Kylo winked down at her and Rey bristled at the nickname.

"I am _not_ a lamb!"

\---------------------------------------------------------

As Rey sat in the large field numerous miles away from the factory, she looked up at the full moon with mournful eyes.

She picked at the grass, twirling a blade in her fingers as the past month flew by her in a mind in the blink of an eye.

Meeting Kylo in the saloon, the church, the river on the last full moon, the train, shooting all those bandits, the ghost town, all of the campsites...Phasma. Phasma was always there in her mind, and she wondered if she'd think that, in this situation, this was the right choice. Should they wait?

No. No, it had to be now. They both decided this.

She closed her eyes, mentally saying goodbye to her humanity and accepting her fate to be a wolf.

She could hear Kylo behind her suddenly, her eyes opening and her lips spreading into a sad smile as she looked over at her shoulder at him and said, "I'm ready now. I've said goodbye to my humanity."

He gave her a single nod and she was suddenly on her back, her eyes wide as she saw him loom over her.

Rey stared up at the furry black mass that was Kylo, her breathing ragged and labored as she shakily reached up and touched his muzzle with trembling fingers. He happily leaned into her touch, letting out a rumbling satisfactory growl as his eyes closed. 

"Be gentle with me," Rey whispered in a meek tone and his eyes reopened. "Please, I beg of you, be gentle with me."

" _Rey._ " He spoke in a voice that was not human and all the hair on her arms stood up as she stared up at him pleadingly.

This was it.

This was where she would say goodbye to her human life and embrace the moon; here in this field with her back smushed up against dead, dried grass. Her humanity would be lost in a place that no flowers bloomed. It was fitting, almost, in a way. 

He nosed her neck affectionately, dragging his claws down her shirt gently as he let out a puff of air against her cheek.

"Where are you going to--" She cut herself off as she saw him delicately lift her right arm in his paw, Kylo pausing for a second with a whine before lowering his head and putting her forearm in his massive jaws.

Oh, God. Oh, God, he would tear her arm clean off if he made one wrong movement. 

But when he bit down, it was if he was biting down in the most delicate way imaginable. Her body jerked as his teeth punctured her flesh, his eyes going wide as he stilled.

He instantly let go of her arm with a deflated look in his eyes and Rey looked down at the lightly bleeding wound in disbelief. The marks weren't deep whatsoever. There was blood, yes, and they were heavily visible, yes, but she wasn't maimed. She wasn't heavily wounded or torn into, he _had_ been gentle just like he promised.

"Sweet boy," Rey breathed out a laugh as a surge of warmth shot up her arm, Kylo whining as she ran a hand through his fur. "You really were gentle."

She felt her vision beginning to blur, a nervous laugh erupting from her throat as an immense heat sank itself into her very being that seemed to raise in temperature with each passing second. Soon, she felt like screaming for she felt as if she was being boiled alive. 

_It's taking too fast,_ Kylo froze with wide eyes before desperately nosing at her cheek to get her screams to stop. She probably didn't even know she was screaming. _The fever is increasing at too fast of a rate. I need--water. Water, water, wa--_

Kylo's thoughts were cut off by a presence he hadn't felt in years, his head whipping up to see a sight that made him instinctually scoop Rey up in his arms and stand up with her.

There was Snoke.

The silver-furred werewolf stood at a whopping ten feet, a foot higher than Kylo, and it looked as if he had been put back together by a mad scientist. Chunks of fur were missing in various places, his teeth yellow with rot and half of his face drooping.

He looked _dead_.

_Hello, Ren,_ Kylo heard Snoke in his head and Kylo shook his head with a growl as he took a step back. Rey's screams had become raspy, her hands desperately clawing at his fur, and Snoke's dead eyes went down to her.

_Is this her? You've already bitten her. Splendid._

_Get the fuck away--_

_Oh, Ren, I merely just wanted to see her,_ Snoke laughed in that inhuman tone as he crouched down, drawing a small cross in the dirt with his claws before grinning. 

_The game doesn't end here, so why would I tear her away from you here? No, no, Ren...you'll know when the game is over. You'll be the loser, and the loser has nothing, don't they? They never get a prize._ His eyes snapped back up to Kylo with the same feral grin.

_Then why are you here...?_

_To see the little whore to estimate how much time it'd take to eat her._

Kylo roared at that, Snoke laughing again.

As Rey turned her head, she swore that the fever must be making her hallucinate.

Because that was the wolf from her nightmare.


	22. Chapter 22

Her conciousness was streaming in and out.

At one point, she felt Kylo's fur against her as he ran. At another point, she heard snarling and barking like a fight was ensuing. At another point, she felt the sun on her with one of Kylo's arms wrapped around her as they rode on Starkiller.

Now, as she fought to stay awake, she realized she was sprawled across a bunking bed in a sleeper train cart with her head in Kylo's lap. He was dabbing a wet washcloth to her forehead as he talked with someone.

"You're lucky he told his men to stay back, Ren."

"He said the game wasn't over. You honestly think he would've killed us right then and there? No. No, he's waitin' like a fox pacin' in front of a hen house."

"How long do you think until he catches up to us?"

"The train gets off in Virginia, don't it? So weeks."

"Unless he takes a train to follow in our footsteps," Hux stated and Kylo grimaced.

Hux cleared his throat before saying, "Well...it's a clean bite. I'm surprised you didn't tear her arm off."

_Me, too, Hux,_ Rey thought lazily and she felt Kylo's hand pause.

"Darlin'? You there?" Kylo asked softly and Rey cracked her eyes open to glance up at him.

"Oh," Kylo breathed out in awe as tears nearly sprang to his eyes, his large hand cupping her cheek. He looked so proud. "Lookie there. Our eyes match now."

"But the fever is destroying her," Hux bit out and Rey's eyes flicked over to him. She wanted to say something back to him, something playful but snarky, but she found that her lips couldn't move and neither could her limbs. It was as if she was paralyzed.

"And that's why I'm takin' care of her and dabbin' her forehead with this here cold washcloth," Kylo gave Hux a tight lipped smile before looking back down at Rey. "And I'm doin' a damn good job, so you can just fuck right off and see where we are by lookin' out the window of the train."

"We're almost to Tennessee," Hux bit out as he stood up from the opposite bunk.

"You hear that, Luna? We're almost to Tennessee," Kylo crooned as he gently pressed the washcloth against her forehead. "Isn't that excitin'? We're way ahead of them now. We're almost to New York."

_When and how the hell did we get on a train...?_ Rey exhaled shakily and he softly hushed her as he grabbed the canteen beside him. As he pressed it to her lips after unscrewing the lid, she greedily drank all of it until there was only but a drop left. Good God, it tasted as if she was drinking from the fountain of life itself. It was _good_.

"It's been a couple days, Ren, the fever should've left by now--"

"It's goin' away," Kylo huffed in annoyance as he took the canteen away. "She'll be better by tomorrow."

And he was right. As she woke up the next morning, she found that she could wiggle her toes and stretch her limbs out, and she could also find that everything seemed...brighter; more focused. She felt alive.

"Mmn," Kylo hummed from beside her in the barely lit train cart, his body side by side with hers in the small bed. He barely fit on it. "Go back to sleep."

"But everything is so vivid," Rey whispered as she outstretched her hand in the dark. She was surprised to see that she could see it as perfectly clear as she could in the daylight. She wiggled her fingers as she let out a giggle, bringing her hand back before turning over to face her lover.

"But it's early," Kylo mumbled with his eyes still closed and Rey pouted. "The sun ain't even up yet. If the sky ain't awake, we shouldn't be awake. Simple as that."

"But _I'm_ awake," Rey huffed quietly as she pouted and Kylo cracked open one eye before slowly opening the other to fully look at her. He shifted to cup her cheek, his thumb stroking her cheekbone as he let out a quiet chuckle.

"Is there any way I could perhaps, I don't know, bribe or lull you back to dreamland?" He asked and Rey bit her lower lip with a smile.

"No." Rey giggled again and Kylo groaned quietly before swinging his arm over her and pulling her directly into his chest which made her laugh loudly as he yanked the covers over her head.

"See? Look at that, it must be so dark under there," Kylo chortled lowly as he closed his eyes once more. "Darkness means sleep, and since it's so dark under there, it means you gotta go back to sleep."

"But I can see under here!" Rey laughed loudly from beneath the sheets and he reopened his eyes. He knew that once she was awake, she'd be more energetic than a rabbit in the springtime and he knew that letting her run around would be the only way to get her to simmer down. Problem was, though, they were on a train in a small train cart with no way for her to run around like an excited puppy.

"We'll get off at the next stop so you can get all your new energy out, okay? But until then you gotta relax. Take a deep breath, just enjoy the calm while we get it."

"It's hot," Rey huffed and she suddenly rolled onto the floor, her new golden eyes staring up at him as she grinned. "I really wanna wrestle you for some reason. Can we play?"

Her instincts really had just kicked in full force, hadn't they? She probably didn't even realize that that was what was going on.

"No, we ca--"

"Because Alpha is tired," Rey sighed almost sadly before the both of them froze. After a moment Kylo bolted up into a sitting position with wide eyes as he looked at her.

"I-I don't know where that came from--"

"Say it again." Kylo growled in a low tone and Rey's cheeks turned crimson.

"B-because...Alpha is tired?" Rey squeaked out and Kylo growled louder as his pupils nearly engulfed his irises. He yanked her back up onto the bed, pulling her into his lap as he growled yet again and tore her jacket off.

"Again."

"Alpha..." Rey whined and Kylo snarled before smashing his lips against hers in an aggressive manner.

As she kissed him back just as fiercely, she remembered that she was supposed to remember something. What was it that she was supposed to remember again? Kylo was too busy distracting her for her to currently remember anything.

His hands tore at her clothes frantically as she did the same to him, only for her to pause as she felt woozy.

"Kylo, hang on--"

"What is it?" He asked as he nipped her neck which elected a small moan from her. This man would be the absolute death of her.

"Dizzy--"

"Ah, shit," Kylo sighed as he immediately stilled his actions. "Hang on. I'll go get you water, okay? Stay here." He smiled as she got off of him and laid down. Rey closed her eyes as he got out of bed after grabbing the canteen on the floor and hurried to the bathroom that lay within the sleeper cart. She could hear the sink running and she snuggled into the bed, a soft, pleased growl emitting from her throat as she breathed in the scent on his pillow. He smelled even better now.

"I'm sorry," Kylo sighed once more as he came out from the bathroom, Rey opening her eyes and sitting up as he sat down and handed her the canteen as he continued, "I should've guessed that that much action would've rattled you. You didn't exactly take that well to the fever. I think you're still healin' but your instincts are ignorin' that."

"But I'm here, aren't I?" Rey smiled before chugging the canteen fully and lowering it once she was done. "I survived."

"Oh, it is never a doubt in my mind that you were goin' to survive, darlin'," Kylo stretched with a yawn before he laid down beside her. "Everyone else was questionin' it, but not me. Finn even tried to pick a fight with me in wolf form when he saw the fever on you."

"Did he win?" Rey chuckled and Kylo snorted out a laugh as he rolled over on his side to face her.

"I refused to fight him out of courtesy to you," he traced the small, quickly fading scratch on his abdomen. "But he got me. Only once, though, because Hux jumped on him and held him down. You should be thankin' me for not tearin' off his head."

"Oh, he scratched you?" She frowned as she placed her hand over the mark. "It doesn't look too deep..."

"He held back," Kylo hummed as he closed his eyes at her touch. "He held back because he knew he'd die if he didn't."

"Well," she smacked her lips. "Fuck. I'm glad you didn't, he happens to be one of my best friends."

"That's exactly why I had to force myself to hold back."

"Well, I'm glad you did," she laid down and snuggled up close to him before pausing and furrowing her brows.

"What is it?"

"There's something I'm supposed to remember," she murmured as she rested her head against his chest. "Something really important...but I can't for the life of me remember what it was. I really can't. It's, like, this huge blur."

"It'll come to you," he took a strand of her hair and twirled it around his finger. "Don't worry a hole into the ground about it."

They lay in the silence after that, the both of them growling happily under their breath as she moved to lay on top of him. He wrapped his arms around her and gave her body a small squeeze as she gave him a chaste kiss on the lips.

"Hey," Rey purred out more than happily. "I love you."

"I love you, too, darlin'," Kylo smiled sleepily as she rested her head back on his shoulder.

She was still for a moment before rolling her hips against his experimentally and he instantly gave a hitched breath in return.

"Luna," his voice was that dangerous low that she so desperately loved, "What are you doin'?"

"Al-pha," she enunciated the word on purpose in a needy tone and his hands instantly slid down to her ass as he grinded back against her. She let out a soft whine as her movements became more needy and frantic, only for Kylo to still her body which nearly made her scream in frustration.

"You're still healin'--"

"I'm fine," Rey grinded down onto him and he let out a quiet groan.

"Get on your side and take the rest of your clothes off," he ordered and Rey instantly obeyed as the both of them yanked the rest of their clothes off and she laid on her side with her back to him.

He grabbed her leg and raised it before thrusting up into her without warning from behind. She cried out only for him to put his hand over her mouth as he thrusted up into her once more while placing an open mouthed kiss on her pulse point.

"You're fuckin' perfect," Kylo growled in her ear as he continued to hold her leg up so he could thrust into her deliciously deep from behind. She moved onto her back a smidge and he uncovered her mouth as his thrusts became rougher. "Touch yourself, Luna."

Rey whimpered loudly as she began to rub furious circles into her clit as her body trembled violently. She could already feel her orgasm building up and his teeth nipping and biting at her neck were soon to send her over edge.

"You're gonna give me pups?" He growled much louder than before as he fucked into her brutally.

"Y-yes! Yes, yes, yes, I-I'm going to give Alpha-- _pups_!" Rey cried out as she came and she was suddenly fully on her back with him between her thighs. He re-entered her with one swift thrust and if his thrusting was brutal before, it was borderline violent now.

"God," Kylo groaned out as he clenched the sheets tightly in his fists. He was panting, his hips going at even faster rate as he leaned down and nipped her neck harshly to the point where he almost broke skin. She _loved_ it.

"I'm gonna fill you up," he was babbling now, the entire bed shaking as she let out loud, high pitched cry after cry. "You're so fuckin' good for me. Fuckin' perfect. You're finer than goddamn imported Chinaware when you lay there and take my cock like the good little girl you are. Fuckin'--fuckin' _stunning_ \--"

"K-Kylo, fill me," Rey whine at the top of her lungs and he snarled as he kissed her roughly before moving up on his knees and grabbing her thighs.

Her new instincts were screaming for him to breed her, her mind reeling for him to fill her and mark her and have his scent linger inside of and on her for weeks. She could feel herself getting wetter and wetter with each second, the cart filling with obscene noises as they both got closer and closer to their release.

For the first time, both of their minds were screaming, " _Bite, breed, pups._ "

His hips suddenly slammed into her full force as he spent himself inside of her and Rey instantaneously came at the feeling of his hot seed filling her up to the very brim. Her body spasmed as she did so, her hips jerking up to push him in further as the both of them moaned their ecstasy out into the small cart. They couldn't care less if the entire train could hear because they were finally, _finally_ the same and they were celebrating it in the way they do best.

"Goddamn," Kylo breathed out shakily as he screwed his eyes shut, his body shaking ever so slightly as he forced himself to stay up on his knees. " _Yes._ "

"K-Kylo," Rey whimpered softly and Kylo instantly leaned down to pepper her jaw and neck with kisses before kissing her sweetly with a smile.

She wasn't sure when she fell back asleep after he pulled out and laid down beside her, but she bolted up two hours later as the train slowly stopped with a loud, frightened gasp.

Silver werewolf. That's what she was supposed to remember.

...It hadn't of been a repressed memory after all.

Snoke had killed Reverend Kenobi all those years ago.


End file.
